Box Office B.S.
by RatedRGoddess | created - 25 Jul 2011 | updated - 26 Jul 2011 | PublicMovies that should have been better
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1. Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009)
PG-13 | 149 min | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi
Sam Witwicky leaves the Autobots behind for a normal life. But when his mind is filled with cryptic symbols, the Decepticons target him and he is dragged back into the Transformers' war.
Director: Michael Bay | Stars: Shia LaBeouf, Megan Fox, Josh Duhamel, Tyrese Gibson
Votes: 428,328 | Gross: $402.11M
face palm. I went to see this on my birthday. My gut told me not to, but I didn't listen. I have seen some crappy films at the movies, including Cop and a Half and Hard Target, where Jean Claude Van Damme sucker punched a snake. Yet, this film shall remain the WORST I have ever seen in a theater. An absolute abomination. Michael Bay and Shia LaBeouf owe me money.
2. Quantum of Solace (2008)
PG-13 | 106 min | Action, Adventure, Mystery
James Bond descends into mystery as he tries to stop a mysterious organisation from eliminating a country's most valuable resource.
Director: Marc Forster | Stars: Daniel Craig, Olga Kurylenko, Mathieu Amalric, Judi Dench
Votes: 470,662 | Gross: $168.37M
This angers me. What the hell was this? I don't remember the villain or the plot.
3. The Matrix Revolutions (2003)
R | 129 min | Action, Sci-Fi
The human city of Zion defends itself against the massive invasion of the machines as Neo fights to end the war at another front while also opposing the rogue Agent Smith.
Directors: Lana Wachowski, Lilly Wachowski | Stars: Keanu Reeves, Laurence Fishburne, Carrie-Anne Moss, Hugo Weaving
Votes: 543,270 | Gross: $139.31M
What is it about the third film in a trilogy where the writers and directors can't figure out what to do with themselves? This movie is a mess, punctuated by the showdown between Neo and Agent Smith. I sat gape mouthed in a theater watching massive water bubbles. LAME.
4. Miami Vice (2006)
R | 132 min | Action, Crime, Drama
Based on the 1980s TV action/drama, this update focuses on vice detectives Crockett and Tubbs as their respective personal and professional lives become dangerously intertwined.
Director: Michael Mann | Stars: Colin Farrell, Jamie Foxx, Gong Li, Naomie Harris
Votes: 123,694 | Gross: $63.45M
For shame. Bad casting, convoluted plot. How can you screw up Miami Vice? Especially the people that worked on the series?
5. Sphere (1998)
PG-13 | 134 min | Action, Mystery, Sci-Fi
A spaceship is discovered under three hundred years' worth of coral growth at the bottom of the ocean.
Director: Barry Levinson | Stars: Dustin Hoffman, Sharon Stone, Samuel L. Jackson, Peter Coyote
Votes: 112,485 | Gross: $37.02M
The very definition of box office b.s. this movie is so stupid, it'll make you feel stupid. It's mind boggling that this was put together.
6. Green Lantern (2011)
PG-13 | 114 min | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi
Reckless test pilot Hal Jordan is granted an alien ring that bestows him with otherworldly powers that inducts him into an intergalactic police force, the Green Lantern Corps.
Director: Martin Campbell | Stars: Ryan Reynolds, Blake Lively, Peter Sarsgaard, Mark Strong
Votes: 296,071 | Gross: $116.60M
I didn't want to do a list repeat, but I had to stick this on here. I hate this movie. I'm so disgusted by it. There was NO reason it should have been so stupid.
7. The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003)
PG-13 | 110 min | Action, Adventure, Fantasy
In an alternate Victorian Age world, a group of famous contemporary fantasy, science fiction, and adventure characters team up on a secret mission.
Director: Stephen Norrington | Stars: Sean Connery, Stuart Townsend, Peta Wilson, Jason Flemyng
Votes: 183,914 | Gross: $66.47M
Cheesy. Just cheesy and bad. Didn't Sean Connery quit acting after this?
8. Watchmen (2009)
R | 162 min | Action, Drama, Mystery
In a version of 1985 where superheroes exist, the murder of a colleague sends active vigilante Rorschach on the trail of a conspiracy that will change the course of history.
Director: Zack Snyder | Stars: Jackie Earle Haley, Patrick Wilson, Carla Gugino, Malin Akerman
Votes: 582,295 | Gross: $107.51M
Some people liked it, I get it. I didn't. Rorschach was cool, but this was just a bad film. The heroes didn't do anything.
9. Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (1997)
PG-13 | 95 min | Action, Adventure, Fantasy
A group of martial-arts warriors has only six days to save the Earth from an extra-dimensional invasion.
Director: John R. Leonetti | Stars: Robin Shou, Talisa Soto, James Remar, Sandra Hess
Votes: 58,118 | Gross: $35.93M
This was the first movie I watched that actually gave me a headache. The producers couldn't get a clue that except for Robin Shou NO ONE from the original movie came back. I'd rather watch Chuck Norris cut his toenails than sit through this again.
10. Van Helsing (2004)
PG-13 | 131 min | Action, Adventure, Fantasy
The famed monster hunter is sent to Transylvania to stop Count Dracula, who is using Dr. Frankenstein's research and a werewolf for nefarious purposes.
Director: Stephen Sommers | Stars: Hugh Jackman, Kate Beckinsale, Richard Roxburgh, Shuler Hensley
Votes: 284,440 | Gross: $120.18M
This was the second movie I ever saw that gave me a headache. I love Hugh Jackman. He and Kate Beckinsale did the best they could. But this movie is trash garbage rubbish.
11. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008)
PG-13 | 122 min | Action, Adventure
Indiana Jones becomes entangled in a Soviet plot to uncover the secret behind mysterious artifacts known as the Crystal Skulls.
Director: Steven Spielberg | Stars: Harrison Ford, Cate Blanchett, Shia LaBeouf, Karen Allen
Votes: 491,296 | Gross: $317.10M
Couldn't this have been made in the 90's when Harrison Ford was in between Clear and Present Patriot Games?!?! And why is Shia LaBeouf here? Is there some kind of quota? Indy deserved better. This movie is boring and unworthy of it's predecessors.
12. Grindhouse (2007)
R | 191 min | Action, Horror, Thriller
Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez's homage to exploitation double features in the '60s and '70s with two back-to-back cult films that include previews of coming attractions between them.
Directors: Robert Rodriguez, Eli Roth, Quentin Tarantino, Edgar Wright, Rob Zombie | Stars: Kurt Russell, Rose McGowan, Danny Trejo, Zoë Bell
Votes: 191,139 | Gross: $25.04M
For me, Death Proof is worse than Planet Terror, which had it's moments. Neither however, had the Tarantino/Rodriguez finesse. Disappointing.
13. Speed Racer (2008)
PG | 135 min | Action, Adventure, Comedy
Young driver, Speed Racer, aspires to be champion of the racing world with the help of his family and his high-tech Mach 5 automobile.
Directors: Lana Wachowski, Lilly Wachowski | Stars: Emile Hirsch, Matthew Fox, Christina Ricci, Nicholas Elia
Votes: 78,413 | Gross: $43.95M
I STILL don't know what the plot to this movie was. Why did they even have dialog. Its great to look at, but needed a story.
14. Resident Evil (2002)
R | 100 min | Action, Horror, Sci-Fi
A special military unit fights a powerful, out-of-control supercomputer and hundreds of scientists who have mutated into flesh-eating creatures after a laboratory accident.
Director: Paul W.S. Anderson | Stars: Milla Jovovich, Michelle Rodriguez, Ryan McCluskey, Oscar Pearce
Votes: 288,311 | Gross: $40.12M
I guess I was always resentful of this series for careening too far into an action film with horror elements, instead of the proper mix of both. (see Walking Dead)
15. Punisher: War Zone (2008)
R | 103 min | Action, Crime, Drama
Frank Castle, known as the Punisher, ruthlessly demolishes organized crime, but it starts an even bigger war.
Director: Lexi Alexander | Stars: Ray Stevenson, Dominic West, Julie Benz, Doug Hutchison
Votes: 67,150 | Gross: $8.05M
The guy that starred in this looked like a mix of Jon Hamm and Clive Owen to me, it was weird. I wanted this to be good so bad. But no, it just couldn't pull it together and falls into Batman and Robin cheese. Will they ever make a good Punisher movie?
16. The Last Airbender (2010)
PG | 103 min | Action, Adventure, Family
Aang, a young successor to a long line of Avatars, must master all four elements and stop the Fire Nation from enslaving the Water Tribes and the Earth Kingdom.
Director: M. Night Shyamalan | Stars: Noah Ringer, Nicola Peltz Beckham, Jackson Rathbone, Dev Patel
Votes: 174,837 | Gross: $131.56M
I haven't seen this for myself and never will. But I am familiar with M.Knight's work(see The Happening -- or wait, don't)
17. Charlie's Angels (2000)
PG-13 | 98 min | Action, Adventure, Comedy
Three women, detectives with a mysterious boss, retrieve stolen voice-ID software, using martial arts, tech skills, and sex appeal.
Director: McG | Stars: Cameron Diaz, Drew Barrymore, Lucy Liu, Bill Murray
Votes: 196,239 | Gross: $125.31M
Toss in the sequel too.
18. Death Race (2008)
R | 105 min | Action, Sci-Fi, Thriller
Ex-con Jensen Ames is forced by the warden of a notorious prison to compete in our post-industrial world's most popular sport: a car race in which inmates must brutalize and kill one another on the road to victory.
Director: Paul W.S. Anderson | Stars: Jason Statham, Joan Allen, Tyrese Gibson, Ian McShane
Votes: 218,862 | Gross: $36.32M
This movie was so dumb I don't know why Jean Claude Van Damme wasn't in it.
19. Alien vs. Predator (2004)
PG-13 | 101 min | Action, Adventure, Horror
During an archaeological expedition on Bouvetøya Island in Antarctica, a team of archaeologists and other scientists find themselves caught up in a battle between the two legends. Soon, the team realize that only one species can win.
Director: Paul W.S. Anderson | Stars: Sanaa Lathan, Lance Henriksen, Raoul Bova, Ewen Bremner
Votes: 212,155 | Gross: $80.28M
Two of the baddest killer creatures in cinema finally meet on film, and they flub it - they even go CW in the sequel. I can't understand it.
20. Alien: Resurrection (1997)
R | 109 min | Action, Horror, Sci-Fi
Two centuries after her death, a powerful human/alien hybrid clone of Ellen Ripley aids a crew of space pirates in stopping the aliens from reaching Earth.
Director: Jean-Pierre Jeunet | Stars: Sigourney Weaver, Winona Ryder, Dominique Pinon, Ron Perlman
Votes: 263,309 | Gross: $47.75M
Lord, they couldn't just let Ripley die. This is just -- such a waste.
21. Predators (2010)
R | 107 min | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi
A group of elite warriors parachute into an unfamiliar jungle and are hunted by members of a merciless alien race.
Director: Nimród Antal | Stars: Adrien Brody, Laurence Fishburne, Topher Grace, Alice Braga
Votes: 243,774 | Gross: $52.00M
Considering this was coming off two horrendous AVP films I had high hopes this would be good. It's not terrible, but it should have been better. They didn't really do anything new. And then they try to do a twist ending, not to mention ultimate crime of only using Larry Fishburne for a small portion of the story. It's just lame.
22. Angels & Demons (2009)
PG-13 | 138 min | Action, Mystery, Thriller
Harvard symbologist Robert Langdon works with a nuclear physicist to solve a murder and prevent a terrorist act against the Vatican during one of the significant events within the church.
Director: Ron Howard | Stars: Tom Hanks, Ewan McGregor, Ayelet Zurer, Stellan Skarsgård
Votes: 309,500 | Gross: $133.38M
Laughably bad - beyond Tom Hanks hair.
23. Alice in Wonderland (I) (2010)
PG | 108 min | Adventure, Family, Fantasy
Nineteen-year-old Alice returns to the magical world from her childhood adventure, where she reunites with her old friends and learns of her true destiny: to end the Red Queen's reign of terror.
Director: Tim Burton | Stars: Mia Wasikowska, Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter, Anne Hathaway
Votes: 440,876 | Gross: $334.19M
What happened? This should have been a slam dunk. This movie is so bland and boring. Helena Bonham Cater was the only one having any fun. Can someone send Tim Burton a note saying he doesn't have to cast Johnny Depp in everything?
24. The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008)
PG-13 | 104 min | Adventure, Drama, Sci-Fi
A remake of the 1951 classic science fiction film about an alien visitor and his giant robot counterpart who visit Earth.
Director: Scott Derrickson | Stars: Keanu Reeves, Jennifer Connelly, Kathy Bates, Jaden Smith
Votes: 178,510 | Gross: $79.37M
One of the worst sci fi's I've seen since Sphere. Ugh it's so bad.
25. Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (2007)
PG-13 | 169 min | Action, Adventure, Fantasy
Captain Barbossa, Will Turner and Elizabeth Swann must sail off the edge of the map, navigate treachery and betrayal, find Jack Sparrow, and make their final alliances for one last decisive battle.
Director: Gore Verbinski | Stars: Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom, Keira Knightley, Geoffrey Rush
Votes: 693,189 | Gross: $309.42M
Bloated time, confusing plot - just plain weird. I wasn't entertained at all. Why do these movies keep making so much money?
26. Why Did I Get Married Too? (2010)
PG-13 | 121 min | Comedy, Drama, Romance
Four couples struggle to save their marriages once again on their annual marriage retreat, while each of them battle through financial, physical, mental, and emotional issues.
Director: Tyler Perry | Stars: Janet Jackson, Tyler Perry, Jill Scott, Sharon Leal
Votes: 10,301 | Gross: $60.10M
I liked the first one. But this one veers back into Perryland. It's very oddly paced and the ending is just - so off.
27. Legion (2010)
R | 100 min | Action, Fantasy, Horror
When a group of strangers at a dusty roadside diner come under attack by demonic forces, their only chance for survival lies with an archangel named Michael, who informs a pregnant waitress that her unborn child is humanity's last hope.
Director: Scott Stewart | Stars: Paul Bettany, Dennis Quaid, Charles S. Dutton, Lucas Black
Votes: 111,939 | Gross: $40.17M
I wish I could steamroll over these dvd's. No one should be subjected to this. Not only does it rip Terminator, but its also racist.
28. I Am Legend (2007)
PG-13 | 101 min | Action, Drama, Horror
Years after a plague kills most of humanity and transforms the rest into monsters, the sole survivor in New York City struggles valiantly to find a cure.
Director: Francis Lawrence | Stars: Will Smith, Alice Braga, Charlie Tahan, Salli Richardson-Whitfield
Votes: 813,799 | Gross: $256.39M
High hopes. Dashed quickly. I had more fun watching Vincent Price in the original.
29. 30 Days of Night (2007)
R | 113 min | Action, Horror, Thriller
After an Alaskan town is plunged into darkness for a month, it is attacked by a bloodthirsty gang of vampires.
Director: David Slade | Stars: Josh Hartnett, Melissa George, Danny Huston, Ben Foster
Votes: 189,328 | Gross: $39.57M
Tedious fact: I was very turned off that the lead vamp in this looked like an eastern European pimp. This movie was scattered, and I have little affection for computer generated gore. It was ok, but it should have been better. THE SEQUEL IS UNWATCHABLE.
30. The Runaways (2010)
R | 106 min | Biography, Drama, Music
A coming-of-age biographical film about the 1970s teenage all-girl rock band The Runaways. The relationship between band members Cherie Currie and Joan Jett is also explored.
Director: Floria Sigismondi | Stars: Kristen Stewart, Dakota Fanning, Michael Shannon, Stella Maeve
Votes: 50,934 | Gross: $3.57M
Kristen Stewart can't act, and if you thought she could outside of Twilight this is proof - no - she cannot. This movie wanted to be Almost Famous so bad. It brought the visuals but no emotion. Just like KStew in Joan Jett drag.
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