My Ranking of TV Shows
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- CreatorRobert D. CardonaDavid MittonStarsPatrick AllenSimon NashShaun PrendergastTugs follows the adventures and mishaps of two rival tugboat fleets: the Star Tugs and the Z-Stacks.10/10
Best quote: "The tugboat, for it's size, is the most powerful craft afloat. And the Star Tugs are the power behind the docks and waterways that make up the Bigg City Port. ...This... is TUGS." - CreatorVince GilliganStarsBryan CranstonAaron PaulAnna GunnA chemistry teacher diagnosed with inoperable lung cancer turns to manufacturing and selling methamphetamine with a former student in order to secure his family's future.10/10
Best quote: "B*tch!" - CreatorGerry AndersonSylvia AndersonStarsSylvia AndersonPeter DyneleyDavid GrahamIn the year 2065, the Tracy family run International Rescue - a top-secret organization whose ongoing mission is to rescue people trapped in extraordinarily dangerous situations using their advanced Thunderbirds machines.10/10
Best quote: "5! 4! 3! 2! 1! Thunderbirds are GO!" - CreatorGraham ChapmanEric IdleTerry JonesStarsGraham ChapmanJohn CleeseTerry GilliamThe original surreal sketch comedy showcase for the Monty Python troupe.10/10
Best quotes: “It’s…”
“Spam!” - CreatorVince GilliganPeter GouldStarsBob OdenkirkRhea SeehornJonathan BanksThe trials and tribulations of criminal lawyer Jimmy McGill in the years leading up to his fateful run-in with Walter White and Jesse Pinkman.10/10
Best quotes: “I AM NOT CRAZY! I am not crazy! I know he swapped those numbers! I knew it was 1216! One after Magna Carta. As if I could ever make such a mistake, never, never! I just- I just couldn’t prove it. He covered his tracks, he got that idiot at the copy shop to lie for him. You think this is something? You think this is bad? This? This chicanery? He’s done worse! That billboard! Are you telling me that a man just happens to fall like that? No! He orchestrated it! Jimmy! He defecated through a sunroof! And I saved him! And I shouldn’t have. I took him into my own firm! What was I thinking? He’ll never change. He’ll never change, ever since he was 9, always the same! Couldn’t keep his hands out of the cash drawer! “But not our Jimmy! Couldn’t be precious Jimmy!” Stealing them blind! And he gets to be a lawyer?! What a sick joke! I should’ve stopped him when I had the chance! And you, you have to stop him! You-”
“It’s all good, man.”
“Sir, can you tell me what you see here?” “Man… f*ckin’ a horse!”
“Jimmy, I’m sorry you’re in pain.” “You’re sorry. You’re sorry? You killed my brother and you say you’re sorry? Let me tell you something. The job offer, it didn’t upset me. It amused me. Big job at the illustrious HHM. A chance to play at the palace! Ooh, little old me?” “I was trying-” “You have no idea what’s going on! You’re a teensy tiny man in a teensy-weensy little bubble!” “Oh, Jimmy.” “Oh, don’t you F*CKING “Oh, Jimmy” me! You look down on me? You pity me? Walk away; that’s right, Howard! You know why I didn’t take the job? Because it’s TOO SMALL!! I don’t care about it! It’s nothing to me! It’s a bacterium, I travel in worlds you can’t even imagine! You can’t conceive of what I’m capable of! I’m so far beyond you! I’m like a god in human clothing! LIGHTING BOLTS SHOOT FROM MY FINGERTIPS!!!”
“Alvarez has been paying me for years. Years. But you know what? I would’ve done it for free, because I hate every last one of you psycho sacks of sh*t. I opened Lalo’s gate, and I would do it again, and I’m glad what they did to him. He’s a soulless pig and I wish I’d killed him with my own hands. And you know what else, Hector? I put you in that chair. Oh, yeah. Your heart meds? I switched them for sugar pills. You were dead and buried, and I had to watch this *sshole bring you back. So, when you’re sitting in your sh*tty nursing home and you’re sucking down on your Jell-O night after night for the rest of your life, you think of me! You twisted f*ck!”
“There’s really no need to-”
“Okay. Let’s talk.”
“So, you’ve always been like this.”
“Mr. Goodman, sit down and stay seated.” “The name’s McGill. I’m James McGill.”
“Fact is, Walter White couldn’t have done it without me.”
“Better Call Saul!” - CreatorMike JudgeStarsMike JudgeKristofor BrownDale RevoAnimated MTV series about two teenage heavy-metal music fans who occasionally do idiotic things because they're bored. For them, everything is "cool" or "sucks."10/10
Best quotes: “Now, boys, I know this will be very hard to get used to, but you have to understand that being in a psychiatric ward is what’s best for you.” “Uh-huh-huh-huh. She said “hard.”
“Would you like any fries with that?” “Uh… did I ask for fries …dumbass?” - CreatorJim HensonJack BurnsStarsJim HensonFrank OzRichard HuntKermit the Frog and his fellow Muppets put on a vaudeville show at their theatre, bringing in a famous celebrity to help out for each episode.10/10
Best quotes: “Just when you think this show is terrible, something wonderful happens.” “What?” “It ends.”
“This show is awful!” “Terrible!” “Disgusting!” “See you next week?” “Of course.”
“I liked that last number.” “What did you like about it?” “It was the last number.”
“How do they do it?” “How do we watch it?” “Why do we watch it?” “Why do you watch it?” - CreatorArmando IannucciStarsChris AddisonJames SmithPeter CapaldiThe Minister for Social Affairs is continually harassed by Number 10's policy enforcer and dependent on his not-so-reliable team of civil servants.10/10
Best quotes: “Hey, could you stop swearing, please?” “Oh, I’m really sorry, you won’t be hearing anymore swearing from us YA MASSIVE GAY SH*TE! F*CK OFF!”
“Come the f*ck in or f*ck the f*ck off.”
“Oi, Yoko Ono and the two remaining Beatles, piss off.” - CreatorRob McElhenneyGlenn HowertonStarsCharlie DayGlenn HowertonRob McElhenneyFive friends with big egos and small brains are the proprietors of an Irish pub in Philadelphia.10/10
Best quote: "You got to pay the troll toll if you want to get into this boy's hole!" - StarsWilliam ShatnerDavid TeschendorfDick WarlockWilliam Shatner hosts this television show, featuring dramatic reenactments of situations leading to emergency calls to 9-1-1.10/10
Best quote: "I'm William Shatner. Join us again next week for true stories... on Rescue 911." - CreatorAlex HirschStarsJason RitterAlex HirschKristen SchaalTwin siblings Dipper and Mabel Pines spend the summer at their great-uncle's tourist trap in the enigmatic Gravity Falls, Oregon.10/10
Best quote: “Hot Belgian waffles! Wait. I’m alone. I can swear for real! SON OF A-” - CreatorGerry AndersonSylvia AndersonStarsKeith AlexanderSylvia AndersonRupert DaviesThe adventures of nine-year-old Joe McClaine, who can have the expert skills, knowledge, and experiences of top experts downloaded into his brain by his scientist father, enabling him to become a secret agent code-named "Joe 90".10/10
Best quote: "Don't come crying to me if you get hurt." - CreatorGerry AndersonSylvia AndersonStarsEd BishopDonald GrayFrancis MatthewsIn 2068, the indestructible Captain Scarlet leads the agents of Spectrum in a war of nerves against the Mysterons from Mars.10/10
Best quotes: “The Mysterons, sworn enemies of Earth, possessing the ability to recreate an exact likeness of an object or person, but first they must destroy. Leading the fight, one man fate has made indestructible. His name… Captain Scarlet.”
“This is the voice of the Mysterons. We know you can hear us, Earthmen.” - CreatorDavid ChaseStarsJames GandolfiniLorraine BraccoEdie FalcoNew Jersey mob boss Tony Soprano deals with personal and professional issues in his home and business life that affect his mental state, leading him to seek professional psychiatric counseling.10/10
Best quotes: “The morning I got sick, I’d been thinking. It’s good to be in something from the ground floor. I came too late for that, I know. But lately, I’m getting the feeling that I came in at the end. The best is over.”
“Ma. I know what you did, Ma. Your only son. Your middle child.” “Look, she can’t answer you, her speech side has been affected.” “Yeah, my ass! I heard the tapes, Ma. The f*cking FBI tapes, don’t tell me you don’t know what I’m talking about!” “Sir!” “George Clooney, don’t get in the f*ckin’ middle of this!” “Alonzo, call security!” “Uncle June is in jail now. And I got one more little last detail I gotta take care of!” “Mr. Soprano!” “I gotta tell ya, I don’t die that f*ckin’ easy, Ma! I’m gonna live a nice, long, happy life, which is more than I can say for you!” “Alright, that’s enough!” “Yeah? I try to do the right thing by you and you try and have me WHACKED?” “She can’t understand you!” “SHE’S SMILING!! LOOK AT THE LOOK ON HER FACE!!! LOOK AT THE LOOK ON HER FACE! She’s smiling! Look at her face!”
“What’s the problem? What the hell’s the matter?” “No, please, go on. He can’t hurt you. Don’t be afraid. I understand. Yes. I feel your anger.” “Who the f*ck are you talking to?” “Charles. Yes, yes, you have a son.” “What the f*ck? I don’t got no kids!” “Oh, Sonny.” “Pagano?” “Kind spirit, is your name Sonny? Charles Pagano.” “How the f*ck do you know that?” “He says he was your first. But I feel many more.” “Hey!” “That one’s laughing. Poison ivy? He wants to know if it still itches.” “Don’t f*ck with me. Who ‘you been talking to?” “You’re gonna have to leave.” “Why? What the f*ck are they saying?” “Do you really want me to say it?” “F*ck you and this bullsh*t. Because that’s what this is, you know. Satanic black magic. Sick sh*t.” “I’m asking you to leave, sir.” “Yeah? *throws chair at ghosts* F*CKIN’ QUEERS!!”
“You’re not gonna believe this. The guy killed sixteen Czechoslovakians. He was an interior director!” “His house looked like sh*t.”
“This is like a f*ckin’ ad for a weight loss center. Before and WAY before!” - CreatorRod SerlingStarsRod SerlingRobert McCordJay OverholtsOrdinary people find themselves in extraordinarily astounding situations, which they each try to solve in a remarkable manner.10/10
Best quote: “You unlock this door with the key of imagination. Beyond it is another dimension - a dimension of sound, a dimension of sight, a dimension of mind. You’re moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas. You’ve just crossed over into the Twilight Zone.” - CreatorLarry DavidJerry SeinfeldStarsJerry SeinfeldJulia Louis-DreyfusMichael RichardsThe continuing misadventures of neurotic New York City stand-up comedian Jerry Seinfeld and his equally neurotic New York City friends.10/10
Best quotes: “Hello, Jerry.” “Hello, Newman.”
“I have a bad feeling that whenever a lesbian looks at me, they think “That’s why I’m not a heterosexual.”
“You’re wasting your life.” “I am not. What you call wasting, I call living. I’m living my life.” “Okay, like what? No, tell me. Do you have a job?” “No.” “You got money?” “No.” “Do you have a woman?” “No.” “Do you have any prospects?” “No.” “You got anything on the horizon?” “No.” “Do you have any action at all?” “No.” Do you have any conceivable reason for even getting up in the morning?” “I like to get the Daily News.”
“Hi, would you be interested in switching over to TMI long-distance service?” “Oh, gee, I can’t talk right now. Why don’t you give me your home number and I’ll call you later?” “Uh, well, I’m sorry, we’re not allowed to do that.” “Oh, I guess you don’t want people calling you at home.” “No.” “Well, now you know how I feel.” - CreatorMichael Dante DiMartinoBryan KonietzkoStarsDee Bradley BakerZach Tyler EisenMae WhitmanIn a war-torn world of elemental powers, a young boy reawakens to undertake a dangerous mystic quest to fulfill his destiny as the Avatar, and bring peace to the world.10/10
Best quotes: “Water. Earth. Fire. Air. Long ago, the four nations lived in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Fire Nation attacked. Only the Avatar, master of all four elements, could stop them. But when the world needed him most, he vanished. A hundred years passed and my brother and I discovered the new Avatar, an airbender named Aang. And although his airbending skills are great, he still has a lot to learn before he’s ready to save anyone. But I believe Aang can save the world.”
“My cabbages!” - StarsMartin LandauBarbara BainNick TateThe crew of Moonbase Alpha must struggle to survive when a massive explosion throws the Moon from Earths orbit and into deep space.10/10
Best quotes: “We’re all aliens until we get to know each other.”
“You mean people killed people just because they were different from each other? That’s disgusting.”
“We are mankind. We came from planet Earth and we built this base called Alpha to learn more about space. But human error blasted this moon out of the Earth’s orbit. And so, we have traveled the universe searching for a place to live. Now, we can no longer live here, and we go to face an uncertain future on the planet that nearly destroyed us. You, whoever you are, who find this empty vessel of Alpha, come and seek us out, if we still exist. Come and teach us all you know. Because we have learned many things, but most of all, we have learned we still have much to learn.” - CreatorBritt AllcroftPhilip D. FehrleRoss HastingsStarsMichael AngelisKeith WickhamMichael BrandonThis series follows the adventures of Thomas the Tank Engine and all of his engine friends on the Island of Sodor.9/10
- CreatorGerry AndersonSylvia AndersonStarsRay BarrettDavid GrahamRobert EastonFollows the adventures of the World Aquanaut Security Patrol, particularly the crew of its most advanced combat submarine called Stingray.9/10
- CreatorBill NyeJames McKennaErren GottliebStarsBill NyePat CashmanMichaela Leslie-RuleScientist/comedian Bill Nye explores various aspects of science for young viewers.9/10
- CreatorEric KripkeStarsKarl UrbanJack QuaidAntony StarrA group of vigilantes set out to take down corrupt superheroes who abuse their superpowers.9/10
Best quote: “Well, well, well, if ain’t the invisible c*nt.” - CreatorDavid FineAlison SnowdenRichard StarzakStarsJustin FletcherJohn SparkesRichard WebberShaun The Sheep is a cheeky and mischievous sheep at Mossy Bottom farm who's the leader of the flock and always plays slapstick jokes, pranks and causes trouble especially on Farmer X and his grumpy guide dog, Bitzer.9/10
- StarsDerek JacobiGeoffrey WawroJames HollandA series of colorized archive footage of important events during World War II.9/10
- CreatorEric AndréStarsEric AndréHannibal BuressRobert SmithEric Andre tries to host a talk show in a bizarre environment, where he is sometimes the player of pranks and sometimes the victim.9/10
- CreatorGerry AndersonSylvia AndersonStarsEd BishopDolores MantezMichael BillingtonThe missions of the Supreme Headquarters Alien Defence Organization (SHADO), which defends Earth from extra-terrestrial threats.9/10
- CreatorTrey ParkerMatt StoneBrian GradenStarsTrey ParkerMatt StoneIsaac HayesFollows the misadventures of four irreverent grade-schoolers in the quiet, dysfunctional town of South Park, Colorado.8/10
Best quote: “Oh my G**, they killed Kenny!” “You bastards!” - CreatorLarry DavidStarsLarry DavidCheryl HinesJeff GarlinLarry David stars as an over-the-top version of himself in this comedy series that shows how seemingly trivial details of day-to-day life can precipitate a catastrophic chain of events.9/10
Best quote: “Pretty good. Pretty pretty pretty good.” - CreatorGene RoddenberryStarsWilliam ShatnerLeonard NimoyDeForest KelleyIn the 23rd Century, Captain James T. Kirk and the crew of the U.S.S. Enterprise explore the galaxy and defend the United Federation of Planets.9/10
- StarsMatthew CorbettBrenda LongmanLarry DannMatthew Corbett runs a shop in Manchester with fun, mischievous puppets Sooty, Sweep, Soo and Little Cousin Scampi.9/10
- CreatorDavid CraneMarta KauffmanStarsJennifer AnistonCourteney CoxLisa KudrowFollows the personal and professional lives of six twenty to thirty year-old friends living in the Manhattan borough of New York City.9/10
- CreatorTom RueggerStarsRob PaulsenJess HarnellTress MacNeilleThe zany adventures of a trio of 1930s animated characters in the modern world.9/10
- CreatorJeff 'Swampy' MarshDan PovenmireStarsVincent MartellaDan PovenmireAshley TisdalePhineas and Ferb invent, scheme, and stay one step ahead of their bratty sister. Meanwhile, their pet platypus plots against evil Dr. Doofenshmirtz.9/10
- StarsJohnny CarsonEd McMahonDoc SeverinsenHost Johnny Carson performs comedy routines and chats with various celebrities.9/10
- CreatorGerry AndersonSylvia AndersonStarsStanley UnwinGary FilesJeremy WilkinThe adventures of an elderly vicar and his gardener, secret agents for B.I.S.H.O.P, who combat criminals and terrorists from overseas in the year 1969.8/10
- StarsMorwenna BanksBrian BowlesSimon GreenallA definitely-not-for-children animated series with each episode made up of an array of perverse skits.10/10 (#19)
- StarsFred RogersBetty AberlinDavid NewellFred Rogers explores various topics for young viewers through presentations and music, both in his world and in the Neighborhood of Make-Believe.8/10
- StarsDavid GrahamGraydon GouldSylvia AndersonThe adventures of the crew of Supercar, an amazing land, sea, and air vehicle, based at a secret laboratory in the Nevada Desert in 1961.8/10
- CreatorGerry AndersonSylvia AndersonStarsDavid GrahamSylvia AndersonPaul MaxwellThe interplanetary adventures of the crew of the World Space Patrol (W.S.P.) spacecraft Fireball XL5, patrolling Sector 25 of the galaxy in the year 2062.8/10
- CreatorMatt DufferRoss DufferStarsMillie Bobby BrownFinn WolfhardWinona RyderWhen a young boy vanishes, a small town uncovers a mystery involving secret experiments, terrifying supernatural forces and one strange little girl.9/10
- CreatorJoanna ColeBruce DegenKristin Laskas MartinStarsLily TomlinDaniel DeSantoLisa JaiAn eccentric teacher takes her class on wondrous educational field trips with the help of a magic school bus.8/10
- StarsGordon RamsayArthur SmithKim SeeleyGordon Ramsay visits struggling restaurants across America and spends one week trying to help them become successful.8/10
- StarsGordon RamsayJean Philippe SusilovicScott LeibfriedWorld renowned chef Gordon Ramsay puts aspiring young chefs through rigorous cooking challenges and dinner services at his restaurant in Hollywood, "Hell's Kitchen".8/10
- CreatorBritt AllcroftRick SiggelkowStarsDidi ConnBrian Edward O'ConnorAlan SemokAt seemingly a ordinary train station in a small American town, extraordinary things happen including a tiny man called "Mr. Conductor" who tells stories about Thomas the Tank Engine and his friends.8/10
- CreatorMatt MaiellaroDave WillisStarsDave WillisCarey MeansDana SnyderThe misadventures of a milkshake, an order of fries, a meatball, and their retired next door neighbor in the suburbs of New Jersey.8/10
- CreatorJames L. BrooksMatt GroeningSam SimonStarsDan CastellanetaNancy CartwrightHarry ShearerThe satiric adventures of a working-class family in the misfit city of Springfield.8/10
Best quotes: “D’oh!”
“Ay caramba!”
“Ha ha!”
“Why you little-!”
“Can we keep him, Dad? Please?” “But he’s a loser! He’s pathetic. He’s… a Simpson.”
“Take this object, but beware, it carries a terrible curse!” “Ooh, that’s bad.” “But it comes with a free frogurt!” “That’s good.” “The frogurt is also cursed.” “That’s bad.” “But you get your choice of toppings.” “That’s good.” “The toppings contain potassium benzoate. …That’s bad.” “Can I go now?”
“What do you think, Smithers?” “I think women and seamen don’t mix.” “We know what you think.”
“Dad! You killed the zombie Flanders!” “He was a zombie?”
“Simpson, Homer Simpson, he’s the greatest guy in history. From the town of Springfield, he’s about to hit a chestnut tree. AAH!”
“Homer, there’s a family of possums in here!” “I call the big one Bitey.”
“Are we gonna die, son?” “Yeah. But at least we’ll take a lot of innocent people with us.”
“Homer, there’s a man who thinks he can help you.” “Batman?” “No, he’s a scientist.” “Batman’s a scientist?”
“Donuts. Is there anything they can’t do?”
“My name is Hans. Drinking has ruined my life. I’m 31 years old!”
“What does this job pay?” “Nothing.” “D’oh!” “Unless you're crooked.” “Woohoo!”
“Uh oh. We’ve drawn Judge Snyder.” “Is that bad? “Well, he’s had it in for me ever since I kinda ran over his dog.” “You did?” “Well, replace the word “kinda” with “repeatedly” and the word “dog” with “son.”
“I am so smart! I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T- I mean, S-M-A-R-T!”
“Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It’s what separates us from the animals… except the weasel.”
“Aw, $20! I wanted a peanut!” “$20 can buy many peanuts!” “Explain how!” “Money can be exchanged for goods and services.” “Woohoo!”
“Give me 700 Krusty Burgers!”
“Well, I know it’s absurd, but I dreamed the boogeyman was after me, and he was hiding under-” “AAH! Boogeyman! You nail the windows shut, I’ll get the gun! Bart, I don’t to alarm you, but there may be a boogeyman or boogeymen in the house!” “Aaaaaaahh!”
“We’ll take the spruce moose! Hop in!” “But, sir, it’s just a mod-” “I said “Hop in.”
“Millions of girls will grow up thinking that this is the right way to act! That they can never be anything more than vacuous ninnies whose only goal is to look pretty, land a rich husband and spend all day on the phone with their equally vacuous friends talking about how damn terrific it is to look pretty and have a rich husband!” “Just what I was gonna say.”
“This is a cornfield, honey.” “Hmm.” “*plane dive bombs them*”
“That’s odd. Usually, the blood gets off at the second floor.”
“No TV and no beer make Homer something something.” “Go crazy?” “Don’t mind if I do!”
“Aw, it’s a boy! And what a boy!” “Uh, that’s the umbilical cord. It’s a girl.”
“Do it for her.”
“Wow, Lisa, looking at you makes me want to get married for a third time. I met a really nice exotic dancer at Hugh’s bachelor party.” “Hugh didn’t have a bachelor party!” “We had one in his honor. …I had one in his honor. …I went to a strip club.”
“Mom, I know your intentions are good, but aren’t the police the protective force that maintains the status quo for the wealthy elite? Don’t you think we ought to attack the roots of social problems instead of jamming people into overcrowded prisons?” “...Look, Lisa! It’s McGriff, the crime dog!”
“Dad, how can you work for a man like Mr. Burns?” “Well, he’s not all bad. He did send me this nice thank you card.” “Dad, this doesn’t have your name on it.” “Kids, would you step outside for a second? FU-”
“To alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life’s problems.”
“I live in a single room above a bowling alley and below another bowling alley.” “Wow.”
“What are you saying?” “I’m saying you’re what’s wrong with America, Simpson. You coast through life, you do as little as possible and you leech off of decent, hardworking people like me. Ha! If you lived in any other country in the world, you’d have starved to death long ago. “He’s got you there, Dad.”
“Ooh, I’ve wasted my life.” - CreatorAndrew CochranStarsDenny DohertyThe adventures of a young tugboat and his friends in the Big Harbour, with the Dispatcher and the Harbourmaster keeping ever-watchful eyes.8/10
- CreatorGreg DanielsMike JudgeStarsMike JudgeKathy NajimyPamela AdlonA straight-laced propane salesman in Arlen, Texas tries to deal with the wacky antics of his family and friends, while also trying to keep his son in line.9/10 (#30)
- CreatorTim HillStephen HillenburgNick JenningsStarsTom KennyRodger BumpassBill FagerbakkeThe misadventures of a talking sea sponge who works at a fast food restaurant, attends a boating school, and lives in an underwater pineapple.8/10
Best quotes: “Shut your mouth, you mediocre clarinet player.” “...Mediocre?”
“The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza for you and me!”
“My leg!”
“Hey, Squidward. Hey, Squidward. Hey, Squidward. Hey, Squidward.” “Okay, I’ll bite. What is it?” “Do you know what day it is?” “Annoy Squidward Day?” “No, silly! That’s on the 15th.”
“I love karate.” “I love kara-te.” “I love money-e.” “I hate all of you.”
“I DEFY YOU, HEART MAN!!”
“Patrick, you’re fired.” “But I don’t even work here.” “How’d you like a job, starting right now?” “Boy, would I.” “You’re fired.”
“Patrick, your genius is showing!” “Where?!”
“The hooks! They draw you in with their pleasing shapes and beguiling colors. But just when you think you’ve found the land of milk and honey, they grab you by the britches and haul you up higher, and higher, and higher, all the way up to the surface, flopping and gasping for air! And then, they cook ya, and then they eat ya, or worse!” “What could be worse than that?” “Gift shops.”
“Maybe a story will cheer you up. It’s called “The Ugly Barnacle”! Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.”
“Is this the Krusty Krab?” “No, this is Patrick.” “Is this the Krusty Krab?” “No, this is Patrick!” “Is this the Krusty Krab?” “NO! THIS IS PATRICK! I am not a Krusty Krab.” “Patrick, that’s the name of the restaurant.”
“He poisoned our water supply, burned our crops, and delivered a plague unto our houses!” “He did?” “No, but are we just gonna wait around until he does?”
“Oh, these aren’t homemade. They were made in a factory. A bomb factory. They’re bombs.”
“At least it’s warm around the fire.” “Hey, if we’re underwater, how can there be a-”
“FINLAND!”
“The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.”
“Have any of you played musical instruments before?” “Do instruments of torture count?” “No.” “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” “No, Patrick, mayonnaise is not an instrument. Horseradish is not an instrument either.”
“My name’s not Rick!”
“We should take Bikini Bottom and push it somewhere else!”
“GOOD GRIEF, HE’S NAKED!!”
“Hurry up! What do you think I’m paying you for?” “You don’t pay me. You don’t even exist. We’re just a clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought.” “One more crack like that and you’re out of here!” “No, please! I have three kids!”
“Don’t be intimidated. Picture him in his underwear. … Oh no, he’s hot!”
“Wait, Spongebob! We’re not cavemen! We have technology!”
“Sounds like a lot of-” “Hoopla!” “Sounds like a lot-” “Hoopla!” “Sounds like-” “Hoopla! Hoopla! *brick is thrown at him*” “Sounds like a lot of hoopla to make over a little Krabby Patty, right? Heh, heh, heh- WRONG!”
“This guy’s so rich he’s got a swimming pool in a swimming pool!” “This guy’s got shoes!”
“Remember, Patrick, flatter the customer.” “Hello?” “I love you.”
“24.” “Hey, Patrick. I just thought of something funnier than 24.” “Let me hear it.” “25.” - CreatorGreg DanielsRicky GervaisStephen MerchantStarsSteve CarellJenna FischerJohn KrasinskiA mockumentary on a group of typical office workers, where the workday consists of ego clashes, inappropriate behavior, and tedium.8/10
Best quote: “If I had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden, and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice.” - CreatorBob KaneEric RadomskiBruce TimmStarsKevin ConroyLoren LesterEfrem Zimbalist Jr.The Dark Knight battles crime in Gotham City with occasional help from Robin and Batgirl.8/10
- CreatorGene RoddenberryStarsPatrick StewartBrent SpinerJonathan FrakesSet almost 100 years after Captain Kirk's 5-year mission, a new generation of Starfleet officers sets off in the U.S.S. Enterprise-D on its own mission to go where no one has gone before.8/10
- CreatorCraig BartlettSteve VikstenJoe AnsolabehereStarsFrancesca Marie SmithJamil Walker SmithDan CastellanetaThe everyday life of Arnold, a fourth-grader in a nameless city that resembles Brooklyn, New York, who lives in a multi-racial boarding house with his grandparents and a motley assortment of friends and neighbors.8/10
- CreatorPhoebe Waller-BridgeStarsPhoebe Waller-BridgeSian CliffordOlivia ColmanSeries adapted from the award-winning play about a young woman trying to cope with life in London whilst coming to terms with a recent tragedy.8/10
- CreatorGerry AndersonStarsKate HarbourRob RackstrawDavid HoltLavender Castle is a place of mystery and legend, fabled throughout the universe, a floating city of light, a place of peace, harmony and all the things that have ever been dreamt of. It is the centre of the universe and the greatest source of power - should it be destroyed, the universe would be plunged into darkness forever. Evil scientist Dr Agon plans to do just that. A lonely meglomaniac with technology-assisted powers of transmutation, he yearns for darkness and has pledged to destroy Lavender Castle from his fortress spaceship, the Dark Station, the most awesome destructive power in the universe, crewed by unseen slaves working deep in the bowels. In order to prevent this, Captain Thrice has set out on a quest to find the elusive Lavender Castle before Dr Agon. A previous encounter with Lavender Castle gave life to Thrice's walking stick and left the Captain with a special knowledge of its power and abilities. Travelling in his cottage spaceship, the Paradox, Thrice assembles a crew of misfits to join him in his quest, combatting evil wherever they find it as they travel the universe searching for clues that will lead them to Lavender Castle. But Lavender Castle works in mysterious ways and lends its power to the Paradox crew to protect them when they most need help.8/10
- CreatorDavid SlackBob HaneyBruno PremianiStarsHynden WalchGreg CipesScott MenvilleA team of five teenaged superheroes save the world from many villains around their city while experiencing things normal teens face today.8/10
- CreatorSherwood SchwartzStarsBob DenverAlan Hale Jr.Jim BackusFour men and three women are stranded on an uncharted island following a torrential storm.8/10
- CreatorDavid LevyStarsJohn AstinCarolyn JonesJackie CooganThe misadventures of a blissfully macabre but extremely loving family.8/10
- DirectorMark HallStarsRichard PearsonIan CarmichaelDavid JasonToad, Rat, Mole, and Badger follow animal etiquette in this version of Kenneth Grahame's classic, in stop-motion model animation.8/10
- CreatorJohn GriffinStarsHarold PerrineauCatalina Sandino MorenoEion BaileyUnravel the mystery of a city in middle U.S.A. that imprisons everyone who enters. As the residents struggle to maintain a sense of normality and seek a way out, they must also survive the threats of the surrounding forest.8/10
- CreatorLinwood BoomerMichael GloubermanGary MurphyStarsFrankie MunizBryan CranstonJustin BerfieldA gifted young teen tries to survive life with his dimwitted, dysfunctional family.8/10
- CreatorTommy BlachaBrendon SmallStarsBrendon SmallTommy BlachaMark HamillThe epic and over-the-top adventures of Dethklok, the world's most successful death metal band.8/10
- StarsLucille BallDesi ArnazVivian VanceThe wife of a band leader constantly tries to become a star - in spite of her having no talent, and gets herself (along with her best friend) into the funniest predicaments.8/10
- StarsShane RimmerAndrew ClementsConnor FlanaganA robot detective investigates numerous bizarre crimes in a futuristic city.8/10
- 201512 epsTV-MA7.0 (3.1K)TV Mini SeriesStarsYûsuke KobayashiJamie MarchiShizuka IshigamiTanukichi Okuma is roped into joining an obscene terrorist organization bent on the destruction of everything that his new school stands for, the most prestigious public morals school.8/10
- CreatorJoan Ganz CooneyLloyd Morrisett Jr.StarsJim HensonFrank OzCaroll SpinneyOn a special inner city street, the inhabitants, human and muppet, teach preschool subjects with comedy, cartoons, games, and songs.8/10
- CreatorNorman LearStarsCarroll O'ConnorJean StapletonRob ReinerA working class man constantly squabbles with his family over the important issues of the day.8/10
- CreatorRob RenzettiStarsJanice KawayeChad DoreckCandi MiloThe escapades of a super-powered robot who happens to resemble a teenage girl that tries to balance high school and teen problems while trying to save the world from danger.8/10
- StarsPeter DinklageBruce Bueno de MesquitaWaller NewellRuling with an iron fist requires an aspiring dictator to know the playbook for absolute power, as history's despots prove in this sardonic docuseries.8/10
- CreatorJoe RubyKen SpearsMitch WatsonStarsFrank WelkerMindy CohnGrey GriffinThis incarnation finds Scooby and the gang living in Crystal Cove, a small town with a long history of ghost sightings, monster tales and other mysteries ripe for the sleuths to solve once and for all.8/10
- CreatorAaron McGruderStarsRegina KingJohn WitherspoonGary Anthony WilliamsBrothers Huey and Riley Freeman experience a culture clash when they leave Chicago to move in with their grandfather in the suburbs.9/10
- CreatorMichael Dante DiMartinoBryan KonietzkoStarsJanet VarneyP.J. ByrneDavid FaustinoAvatar Korra fights to keep Republic City safe from the evil forces of both the physical and spiritual worlds.8/10
- StarsMaurice LaMarcheRob PaulsenTress MacNeillePinky and Brain are genetically enhanced laboratory mice who reside in the research facility. Brain is self-centered and scheming; Pinky is good-natured but feeble-minded. In each episode, Brain devises a new plan to take over the world.8/10
- StarsNam Joo-hyukKim Ji-yeonChoi Hyun-wookIn a time when dreams seem out of reach, a teen fencer pursues big ambitions and meets a hardworking young man who seeks to rebuild his life.8/10
- CreatorBob KushellBill PradyStarsDave GoelzEric JacobsonBill BarrettaJim Henson's lovable Muppets return to the small screen in this mockumentary-style series that follows their personal and professional lives.7/10
- CreatorGerry AndersonStarsJeremy HitchenDenise BryerAnne RidlerThe missions of a planetary defense organization dedicated to protecting Earth from a Martian menace.7/10
- CreatorGreg DanielsMichael SchurStarsAmy PoehlerJim O'HeirNick OffermanThe absurd antics of an Indiana town's public officials as they pursue sundry projects to make their city a better place.7/10
- CreatorRobert KirkmanRyan OttleyCory WalkerStarsSteven YeunJ.K. SimmonsSandra OhAn adult animated series based on the Skybound/Image comic about a teenager whose father is the most powerful superhero on the planet.7/10
- CreatorDavid X. CohenMatt GroeningStarsBilly WestJohn DiMaggioKatey SagalPhilip J. Fry, a pizza delivery boy, is accidentally frozen in 1999 and thawed out on New Year's Eve 2999.7/10
- StarsDanny WallaceDonald Ian BlackJennifer JulianUnwrap the real stories behind these iconic blockbusters, thanks to insider interviews and behind-the-scenes peeks.7/10
- CreatorNeal BrennanDave ChappelleStarsDave ChappelleDonnell RawlingsRudy RushComedian Dave Chappelle hosts this sketch-comedy show that parodies many of the nuances of race and culture.7/10
- CreatorRoberta LeighStarsNancy NevinsonDenise BryerThe adventures of a male doll who is able to extend his legs and arms.7/10
- CreatorGeorge LucasStarsTom KaneDee Bradley BakerMatt LanterJedi Knights lead the Grand Army of the Republic against the droid army of the Separatists.7/10
- CreatorDaniel ChongStarsEric EdelsteinDemetri MartinBobby MoynihanThree bear brothers do whatever they can to be a part of human society by doing what everyone around them does.7/10
- CreatorChris CarterStarsDavid DuchovnyGillian AndersonMitch PileggiTwo F.B.I. Agents, Fox Mulder the believer and Dana Scully the skeptic, investigate the strange and unexplained, while hidden forces work to impede their efforts.7/10
- StarsHan Hye-jinKim Seong-gyoonCho Seung-wooDriven by a personal tragedy, a pianist-turned-lawyer navigates the complex world of divorce - fighting for his clients to win by any means necessary.7/10
- CreatorRebecca SugarStarsZach CallisonDeedee MagnoMichaela DietzA team of intergalactic warriors fights to protect the Earth, but the combination of three highly trained beings and one quirky young boy leaves the team struggling to overcome the dangerous scenarios that are put in front of them.7/10
- CreatorCharlie BrookerStarsWunmi MosakuMonica DolanDaniel LapaineFeaturing stand-alone dramas -- sharp, suspenseful, satirical tales that explore techno-paranoia -- "Black Mirror" is a contemporary reworking of "The Twilight Zone" with stories that tap into the collective unease about the modern world.7/10
- CreatorIvan RaimiSam RaimiTom SpezialyStarsBruce CampbellRay SantiagoDana DeLorenzoAsh has spent the last thirty years avoiding responsibility, maturity, and the terrors of the Evil Dead until a Deadite plague threatens to destroy all of mankind and Ash becomes mankind's only hope.7/10
- CreatorSusan HarrisStarsBea ArthurBetty WhiteRue McClanahanFour previously married women live together in Miami, sharing their various experiences together and enjoying themselves despite hard times.7/10
- CreatorDavid SimonStarsDominic WestLance ReddickSonja SohnThe Baltimore drug scene, as seen through the eyes of drug dealers and law enforcement.6/10
- CreatorCraig McCrackenStarsCathy CavadiniElizabeth DailyTara StrongThree super-powered little girls constantly save the world (or at least the city of Townsville) from monsters, would-be conquerers and a few other gross things.7/10
- CreatorJerry SeinfeldStarsJerry SeinfeldMichael RichardsMario JoynerJerry Seinfeld is joined by friends for a cup of coffee and a drive in a classic car, sharing stories all along the way.7/10
- CreatorJohn CunliffeStarsKen BarrieCarole BoydMelissa SindenThis classic children's series follows the adventures of everyone's favourite postman as he carries out his mail rounds in the village of Greendale.7/10
- StarsSimon BirdJames BuckleyBlake HarrisonFollows four friends and their antics during their final years of school.7/10
- CreatorGlen A. LarsonStarsDavid HasselhoffEdward MulhareRichard BasehartA lone crimefighter battles the forces of evil with the help of a virtually indestructible and artificially intelligent supercar.7/10
- CreatorMike LazzoKhaki JonesStarsGeorge LoweC. Martin CrokerAndy MerrillSpace Ghost, a superhero from a 1960s Hanna-Barbera cartoon, hosts his own talk show.7/10
- CreatorGenndy TartakovskyStarsPhil LaMarrMakoKevin Michael RichardsonA samurai, sent through time, fights to return home and save the world.7/10
- CreatorGerry AndersonArthur ProvisStarsKenneth ConnorNicholas ParsonsDenise BryerSheriff Tex Tucker makes sure all is well in Four Feather Falls with the help of his dog Dusty and Rocky the horse. Done with puppets, even the animals talk and sing along with the humans as problems are quickly wrapped up.7/10