- If you know me you know how uncool I am. I stutter, wear bad clothes, make bad jokes, make conversation uncomfortable, the list goes on. Thank you for making me feel okay.
- You can live with me in this house I've built out of writers blocks.
- My parents treat me like I'm 14. They make me clean my room and stuff like that. They're always like "I don't care what MTV says you are.
- See, there's the bands that you say you like to sound smart, and there's the bands you say you like to get laid. And then there's the bands you really listen to. -Rolling Stone Interview
- We're sick of hearing people say "that band is so gay" or "those guys are fags". Gay is not a synonym for shitty. If you want to say something's shitty, say it's shitty. Stop being such homophobic assholes!
- I was isolating myself further and further, and the more I isolated myself, the more isolated I'd feel. I wasn't sleeping. I just wanted my head to shut off, like, I just wanted to completely stop thinking about anything at all. - Rolling Stone Magazine On Ativan O.D Incident
- Underwear. It's like a god damned leash. It also constantly reminds me of how funny I look naked.
- I guess we're just one of those bands that just polarizes people. Some people worship the ground we walk on, and some people say we're ruining music and should just shut out mouths. If you want to keep either of those opinions, you should try not to engage us in a real conversation. (On being voted worst band of 2005 by Spin magazine.)
- I obsessively wanted to be in bands. I was probably fourteen when I got my first bass it was my friend's brother's, and we stole it. I was really into the idea that we could just play basement shows. The name of the first band was First Born, and it was terrible. We played this hair-metal place in Iowa they gave you 150 tickets to sell, and you give them the money. We gave the tickets away, said we lost the money, and this old Italian guy almost beat the f**k out of us. But to me it was awesome.
- I can be unhappy and I can be happy, I am just one human being that thinks about my life and tries to figure myself out. When I write about feeling ****** it's not because I want to put on black nail varnish and when I write songs about being happy it's not because I sold a million records. It's because I am going through my life and figuring it out as I go along.
- It's important for girls to understand that they don't need to just be coat hangers for boys. It's not all about being groupies.
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