The Pharmacist (1933)

W.C. Fields: Mr. Dilweg

Photos 

Quotes 

• [a customer has just bought one postage stamp] 

  Customer : You got change for a hundred?

  Mr. Dilweg : No, no, but thanks for the compliment.

• Mr. Dilweg : [pulling down the dress hem on a woman who has fainted]  She's liable to get diptheria.

• His daughter : You don't love me, anymore!

  Mr. Dilweg : [Raises stick threateningly]  Of course I love ya.

  Mrs. Dilweg : Don't you strike that child!

  Mr. Dilweg : She's not gonna tell ME I don't love her.

• Dyspeptic customer : A person hasn't got any rights in this country anymore! The government even tells you what color stamps you gotta buy!

  Mr. Dilweg : Yes, it's pretty tough. That's the Democratic Party for you. I've written to Washington about it.

  Dyspeptic customer : What do you want to write to Washington for? He's dead!