- McCaleb: Heh, see that chess game over there? When I was four years old, I played ten people, all at once, blindfolded. I lost every game.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: [trying to open a door] Who's in there?
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: It's China Doll, the gal that drives men mad.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: What the devil are you doing aboard?
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Nothing laddie. Just showering dewdrops off the body beautiful.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: I'll be over as soon as I get through. Anything you want?
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Anything I... ? Toots, I got everything.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: But you taught me something I didn't even know myself. When a woman can love a man right down to her fingernails, she can hate him the same way.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: [to chief officer] It's bad enough to have a ship that looks like this and a captain who looks like me without having a chief officer who looks like you.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Say, there ain't enough dough in all Asia to make me change the way I feel about one guy.
- Jamesy MacArdle: Still crazy about that Gaskell, huh? Well, whenever you get tired of running around with an Airedale and you want to run around with a St. Bernard, why you let me know.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Sure. Whenever I get lost in the Alps, I'll whistle for you.
- Jamesy MacArdle: All right, I'll come running.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Now wait a minute, Dolly. You and I are friends. We've had a lot of fun together and as far as I'm concerned, you're a number one girl in the archipelago. But, I don't remember making any vows to you, nor do I recall asking for any.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Don't you get polite at me! When you start talkin' with your high hat on I - I know you mean it and - and it scares me. Say, who do you think you are anyway? If I had a nickels worth of pride, I'd...
- Captain Alan Gaskell: If that 's the way you feel about it, I'm not standing in your way.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: That's just the soup I'm in, I don't feel that way at all. You - you dog!
- [Smiles and give Gaskell a kiss]
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Now, that's more like it.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Did you ever see an English river, Dolly?
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: No, I'm dumb with geography, just like I am with everything else.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Well, it's cool and clear and clean. Put a stream like that alongside any river out here - dirty, yellow, muddy - you'll see the difference.
- Sir Guy: [the police superintendent has just taken Dolly to court] What about a nip to cool that aching brow ?
- Captain Alan Gaskell: No, no, fix one for yourself. I gotta get around to court. Somebody'll have to protect that judge.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Well, I-I understand congratulations are in order. I'd like to be the first to wish you the best. You'll need it.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Someday you'll say something nice and never forgive yourself.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: What have you got in your mouth?
- Dawson: Chewing tobacco, sir.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Its bad enough to have a ship that looks like this and a Captain that looks like me, without having a Chief Officer who looks like you!
- Captain Alan Gaskell: How many hours do we have to spend saying goodbye to each other, before it takes?
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: That's just the trouble, toots, it took too good! Gee, you were sweet to me.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: All right, come on now, this is it, go ashore
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: But, lookie, what am I gonna do with my ticket? It's all paid for and everything.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: I knew you had something up your sleeve. All right, come on, we'll get your money back.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: No, but I got a job in Singapore and honestly I...
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Oh, yes, yes, I know, I suppose they've elected you mayor!
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: No, but, it's on the level, toots, Hoffman sent me a contract for the rest of the season.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: All right, toots, you - you win. I hope you have a good trip. Goodbye.
- [Gives Gaskell a nice, long kiss]
- Captain Alan Gaskell: All right. All right. If you've got your ticket and a job, I don't suppose I can...
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Blimey!
- [Jumps into Gaskell's arms]
- Captain Alan Gaskell: So, you just came down to say goodbye? You brought enough of your cigarettes to last a voyage to New York.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Well, I'll smoke a lot more cigarettes than that, toots, before we ever really say goodbye.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: They got big feet for Sing-Song Girls, don't they?
- Jamesy MacArdle: Well, they, they don't bandage the feet nowadays. These are enlightened days.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Those feet are big even for enlightened days.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Okay, toots. I know you ain't got much time to fool around with passengers.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: It's your own fault. You wanted to be one.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Except, maybe, that English dame?
- Captain Alan Gaskell: You're becoming very observant.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: I saw her when she came aboard. She looked like she was smellin' a dead fish or somethin'.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Isabel? Isabel McCarthy?
- Isabel McCarthy, Dolly's Maid: Yes 'em.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Would you say that I look like a lady.
- Isabel McCarthy, Dolly's Maid: No, sir, Miss Dolly. I been with you all too long to insult you that way.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: What's that snooty English dame got that I ain't?
- Isabel McCarthy, Dolly's Maid: She's more refined, like. She would never wear that dress with all them shiny beads you got. That dress is more my type.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: You been hintin' for that dress for more than a month. Go on and take it.
- Isabel McCarthy, Dolly's Maid: You shore is got the right instincts, no matter what they all say.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: What do they say?
- Isabel McCarthy, Dolly's Maid: Oh, its just the minor talk. They say you's got yourself so hooked on to that Captain Gaskell, that he's shakin' himself like a wet hound dog and can't get you loose, no how. Yes, Miss, they do, like a wet hound dog.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Say, speakin' of meetings, Jamesy, do you remember that night in that putang joint in Saigon when you and me met up with a certain party?
- Jamesy MacArdle: Oh, do I!
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: There wasn't any moon, but, he had a shiner on his left eye that lit up the whole street!
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: What are you grinning at?
- Sybil: You must be very fond of him.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: What makes you think so?
- Sybil: To humiliate yourself like this.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: How's it, toots? Well, come on and play dumb it you want. I just came in to tell you, I'm not gonna come around and pester you anymore. Look, I'm takin' all my cigarettes. You know, its moonlight outside. Gee, it's pretty. Ain't it funny we always fight when its moonlight and make up when its rainin'? Its about time for the rainy season, ain't it, toots? Aw, come on out of the trenches. I'm not gonna throw any bombs. I'm harmless.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Yes, of course, you're as harmless as a revolutionary.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Well, anyway, it won't be so lonely while Jamesy is aboard.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: I hate to hear you talk like that Dolly.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Well, a gal's got to do the best she can with what's around.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: You owe yourself more than that.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: The trouble is boyfriend, there ain't any male Mrs. Barclays. So charming. So refined.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Well, the real trouble is, there aren't enough female Mrs. Barclays.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Look, toots, I, ah, gee, I don't blame you for bein' sore. I know I've done a lot of stupid gabbing. But, this is on the level. I wish you all the luck. And that's one baby you'll never have to be ashamed of. She's a real McCoy and she'll make a - a marvelous wife for ya.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: I wish you meant that.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Now, lets quit good friends instead of like a couple of cab drivers after a drunken brawl.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Yeah, I guess that's the way it ought to be done. But, I ain't been brought up to do the right thing, like that English dame. All I can say is what's down inside of me. And I don't care how long you been carryin' the torch for her - you can't quit me any more than I can quit you! And you can kiss a stack of cookbooks on that!
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Toots, you've got to listen to me. I only came here for one thing.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: I'm quite aware of that! You're always waiting for a sailor to comfort him, as only a woman like you can comfort a man whose too tired or too drunk to care who he is.
- Isabel McCarthy, Dolly's Maid: Lordy, lordy! Now I've got enough clothes to last me a million years.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Well, I hope you have better luck in 'em than I did.
- Isabel McCarthy, Dolly's Maid: Don't you worry, Miss Dolly. I got me a conjure: the left hind leg of a black cat who's been killed by a snake bite. Nothing go out and touch me! No matter what they does to you.
- Jamesy MacArdle: [to an unconcious Gaskell] There can't be any gold. You would have talked. Nobody can be that tough.
- Jamesy MacArdle: Lovin' you is the only decent thing I ever did in my entire life. And even that was a mistake.
- Sir Guy: I've had my eye on you for some time.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Well take it off... I'm quitting the China seas as soon as we dock.
- Sir Guy: Aw, there you are.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Good morning, Mrs. Higgins.
- Mrs. Higgins: We were just talking about you, Captain.
- Sir Guy: Mrs. Higgins tells me you've been sensationally blotto ever since you went ashore.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: You don't like my behavior ashore or aboard ship, you can get a new boy. In fact, I wish you would!
- Sir Guy: Ha! You wouldn't go if you could.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Wouldn't I? I'm so close to being back to England now, I can hear Big Ben chiming.
- Sir Guy: I've heard that from men for 50 years. It's only the weak ones that sneak out of the China Seas. It's the bullheads like you that stay on.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Get on your horse, we're shoving off.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Say, why are you so anxious to get me out of your sight? Is that hunk of caviar makin' the round trip?
- Captain Alan Gaskell: What hunk of caviar?
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: That redhead Russian princess that was on board from Singapore.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: She isn't a Russian and she isn't a princess and I have my doubts about her hair color.
- Davids: I'm not a coward!
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Steward Davids, you let pirates come to your ship, you lost every white man on board, except yourself!
- Captain Alan Gaskell: If I'd had a more definite tie, I might have behaved a bit more decently.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Say, if you ain't decent, boyfriend, you'll do until somethin' decent comes along.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: Out here maybe. But, anywhere else in the world, we'd both be a little bit soiled.
- Paul: Better take care of these pearls, in case of piracy
- Mrs. Timmons: Why, they're artificial. They're not worth anything.
- Timmons: Twelve and a half bucks.
- Paul: Well, a bargain, I say. Where did you get them Mr. Timmons?
- Timmons: She picked them up.
- Mrs. Timmons: I bought them myself, in Tokyo.
- Paul: Well, you know, its not always easy to tell the real from - I'm sure you didn't pay too much for them.
- Timmons: Bet your sweet life she didn't. That little woman gets her monies worth every time. Huh, boopsie?
- Jamesy MacArdle: Twenty years on the China Seas and she never lost a spangle.
- McCaleb: I had a spangle once. It was a cocka spangle. She had a liter of field mice.
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Where is the big guy?
- Chief Steward Ted Gary: You mean the Captain, Miss? He went, eh, that is maybe he's escorting Mrs. Barclay,
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Well, why doesn't she put a ring in his nose so she can lead him around easier?
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: [Cabin boy Ah Sing, pouring a double shot of scotch] Get on the belt line and keep 'em coming.
- Captain Alan Gaskell: You've never seen a moon until you've watched the one over the China Seas. It'll be full by the time we get to Singapore.
- Sybil: Oh, glorious!
- Dolly 'China Doll' Portland: Jeez, too amazing for words! There I was with a cinder in me eye, as large as a paving block, with the grand duke on one side of me and the marquis on the other. Both trying to pull my top lid over my bottom!