The Legend of Lylah Clare (1968)

Kim Novak: Lylah Clare, Elsa Brinkmann, Elsa Campbell

Photos 

Quotes 

• Elsa Brinkmann : Barney, darling, you're so much smarter when you don't try to think.

• Elsa Brinkmann : Do you really believe that you have a licence to ask any dirty question that slimes into that snake's nest between your ears?

  Lewis Zarken : Elsa, be careful, don't...

  Rossella : Brava.

  Elsa Brinkmann : And nobody challenges you. Why? Because they are gentleman?

  [guttural laugh] 

  Elsa Brinkmann : I'll tell you why. Molly Luther's magic wand.

  [twirls Molly Luther's cane] 

  Elsa Brinkmann : It keeps keeps her safe from

  [two thumps against Molly Luther's leg brace] 

  Elsa Brinkmann : dragons!

• Lewis Zarken : [Talking about choosing a stage name for Elsa]  Elsa Brinkmann. "John Foster Brinksmanship." It's horrible. We'll have to change your name.

  Elsa Brinkmann : Thank you, but I'm happy with the name I have.

  Lewis Zarken : Well, I'm not! And neither will the public be! Anyway, what's in a name? Why are you so sensitive? If it's any consolation to you, I rejoiced in the name of "Flack." Louie Flack, F-L-A-C-K, Flack. How does *that* grab you? Then one day I saw this magician: "Zarkan the Magnificent." He was a terrible act. I think he finished up cutting his throat in a Hungarian boarding house. Anyway, I lifted his name. Sounds a bit like a Transylvanian pox doctor, but it serves to impress the natives. We'll do the same for you.

• Bart Langner : Here's a picture she liked very much, a wardrobe still from The Love That Flamed. They were rehearsing for it when they got married.

  Becky Langner : The worst thing he ever did, believe me.

  Elsa Brinkmann : What, not making the picture?

  Becky Langner : No, marrying Lylah. Lewis Zarken is no Boy Scout, but *that* girl - *whew* - tramp, degenerate; there's no other word for her!

• Elsa Brinkmann : Now, you get your ass out there - and tell 'em Lylah's coming as soon as she gets her harness on. And when she whistles, they squat! All of the them! Every damn last one!

• Elsa Brinkmann : Hear me, Barney? Squat and wait! Ha! Just wait for Lylah!

  [guttural laugh] 

  Elsa Brinkmann : Wardrobe!

• [first lines] 

  Bart Langner : [showing Elsa Brinkmann old studio photos of the late movie star Lylah Clare]  Oh, this lousy projector - I hope it still works. There, I think I've got it. This is the only picture I have of Lylah in color. Despite what you may have heard, this is the only time she ever posed in the nude. You can't imagine what a really big star she was, I mean really big! Everybody loved her, worshipped her.

  Elsa Brinkmann : She had a strange kind of appeal, didn't she.

• Elsa Brinkmann : She's dead. I'm alive. You just got to have to get used to me.

  Rossella : I think that could be arranged.

• Lewis Zarken : Without a Director, you're just a vulgar little exhibitionist. You haven't the remotest idea what you're doing.

  Elsa Brinkmann : You really believe that, don't you, little man? Alright, little man, I'll show you. We'll see who's number one.

• Reporter with thick glasses : What do you know about Stanislavsky?

  Elsa Brinkmann : [giving a previously rehearsed answer]  Didn't he used to play second base for the Dodgers?

• Bart Langner : You said you were interested in acting.

  Elsa Brinkmann : But as myself. As me. I'm all wrong for her. Wrong. I just wouldn't want to - I couldn't be like her.

  Bart Langner : You don't have to *be* like her, just act like her.

  Becky Langner : God forbid.

• Lewis Zarken : How much can you see without those glasses you keep trying to hide? Never mind. Hair, teeth, that's easy. Wardrobe, we can fix that. I've had your clothes moved. You'll live here.

  Elsa Brinkmann : You've done what?

  Lewis Zarken : You'll live here!

  Elsa Brinkmann : Look, I decide where I live. My things belong to me!

  Lewis Zarken : If you're not interested, there ae the stairs.

  Elsa Brinkmann : I'm wrong. You don't want *me*.

  Lewis Zarken : No. I want someone that'll walk, talk, and go through the motions that I taught Lylah. It'll be a 24-hour job. I'll rummage through your soul like a pickpocket through a stolen purse. "Always Beloved," 1937.

• Lewis Zarken : A young lady like you, who wants to make a sale, the buyer has a right to examine the goods.

  Elsa Brinkmann : Let go of me!

  Lewis Zarken : Did you hear that, Bart? She has dramatic talent. She doesn't wanna be touched!

  Elsa Brinkmann : Keep your filthy hands off me!

  Rossella : Lylah.

  Elsa Brinkmann : I'm not her. I'm not.

  Lewis Zarken : No, you're not, are you. But, you'll do for now.

• Elsa Brinkmann : Considering the kinds of pictures the public wants, I think my best side is going to turn out to be horizontal.

• Elsa Brinkmann : Don't worry. I'll curtsy and say my peace.

  Lewis Zarken : Do and I'll kiss your hand.

  Elsa Brinkmann : As Lylah would say, it won't be my hand you can kiss.

  Lewis Zarken : Don't try to be funny! You haven't the brains for it!

• Molly Luther : You grubby little slut!

  Elsa Brinkmann : Molly Luther, the Wicked Witch of the West! You throw water on her and she shrivels. She melts!

  [guttural laugh] 

  Elsa Brinkmann : Imagine that! She really melts! And all that's left is a little phony flower and a dried up, disappointed freak!

• Molly Luther : I presume you know what kind of an establishment Lewis' last performer came from. Are we to take it that your background is equally unfortunate? Oh, come along, child, surely, you're not retarded. I'm asking you do you sleep with him?

  Elsa Brinkmann : Why, you miserable son of a bitch. What makes you think that because once, yes, Miss Luther, maybe just once you spent a cozy hour with Lewis Zarkan the you have a right to be jealous of him?

• Lewis Zarken : [walking int the garden with Elsa, wearing a bra - no shirt - and pants]  That kind of semipublic exposure never troubled Lylah.

  Elsa Brinkmann : You mean she was never ashamed of anything?

  Lewis Zarken : In the ancient tradition, she wasn't coy, no girdles, deodorants. Proud of what she was - a woman. Whatever a man needed of her, she gave.

  Elsa Brinkmann : Of course - the mermaid. Every man thinks he wants one of those.

• Elsa Brinkmann : Please, I'm only a woman.

• Elsa Brinkmann : I'm sure they all think I'm your mistress, hmm?

  Lewis Zarken : Don't flatter yourself. The ones that know me know that I never sleep with my leading ladies - at least until after the last day of shooting. It gives them too much power.

• Elsa Brinkmann : We're going to make a good picture, eh, liebling? We're going to have a good time.

• Lewis Zarken : It's a perfectly simple action. I don't see why you can't follow orders.

  Elsa Brinkmann : It's not simple! I don't know what I'm supposed to be - thinking. What am I feeling, out there, the day I've been married? Why? What am I supposed feel?

  Lewis Zarken : Feel? You stupid cow! All you got to do is do as I say and then our feeling will be up on the screen. All I need is your face! I don't want your good will or your understanding. Think of something! Uncle Bart dying of cancer. That's the expression I need on you.

• Lewis Zarken : Paolo, do you think you could be persuaded to resume your - hor-ticultural activities now?

  Elsa Brinkmann : [guttural laugh]  Why Lewis, that's rather funny.

  Paolo : You want I should go now?

• Elsa Brinkmann : Elsa? Who's that? Another of your girls? This is Lylah. Do you hear me, Lewis? This is Lylah!

• Lewis Zarken : Who are you?

  Elsa Brinkmann : I'm somebody that you wanted to make love to! Some people might think that had a certain amount of responsibility.

  Lewis Zarken : Oh, would they? You don't own me. You don't control me. On the contrary. You be on the set at 9 o'clock in the morning and do exactly as I say. Because, you're an illusion. Without me, you don't exist. You're nothing! Do you understand? Nothing!

• Elsa Brinkmann : My apologies for keeping you waiting, boys. Let's go.

• Elsa Brinkmann : I'm what you made me, Lewis. Look, look! Look. You're God. I'm created in your image!

• Elsa Brinkmann : One shot. Just me. So keep your cameras rolling, Mr. Zarkan. I'm on my mark. Let's go.