The Pink Panther Strikes Again (1976)

Peter Sellers: Chief Inspector Clouseau

Photos 

18 more photos

Quotes 

• Clouseau : Does your dog bite?

  Alpenros Hotel Clerk : No.

  Clouseau : [bowing down to pet the dog]  Nice doggie.

  [Dog barks and bites Clouseau in the hand] 

  Clouseau : I thought you said your dog did not bite!

  Alpenros Hotel Clerk : That is not my dog.

• Francois : Do you know what kind of a bomb it was?

  Clouseau : The exploding kind.

• Clouseau : Tell me do you have a reum?

  Munich Hotel Clerk : I do not know what a 'reum' is.

  Clouseau : [looks up the word 'room' in his German dictionary]  Zimmer.

  Munich Hotel Clerk : Ah, a 'room'.

  Clouseau : That is what I have been saying, you idiot. Reum. Zimmer.

• [after Clouseau accidentally reduces a piano to a pile of splinters] 

  Mrs. Leverlilly : You've ruined that piano!

  Clouseau : What is the price of one piano compared to the terrible crime that's been committed here?

  Mrs. Leverlilly : But that's a priceless Steinway!

  Clouseau : Not anymore!

• Clouseau : There is someone in this room who knows more about the murder than he is telling.

  Mrs. Japonica : Murder?

  Clouseau : What was that you said?

  Mrs. Japonica : I said "murder".

  Clouseau : What murder?

  Mrs. Japonica : I-I-I don't know, y-you said "murder".

  Clouseau : I said murder? *You* said murder!

  Mrs. Japonica : No, I said murder because *You* said murder.

  Clouseau : *I* said murder?

  Mr. Shork : You said there is someone in this room who knows more about the murder than he is telling.

• Clouseau : [after Dreyfus is knocked into the river for a second and third time and Clouseau thinks he is trying to hide that he's upset]  I'm afraid today is just not your day, my friend.

  Dreyfus : [quickly stands up]  Oh, but it is! It is, my "friend" after three, long terrible years it is AT LAST my day! I will not permit, "repeat," not permit anything..."repeat" anything to spoil it. Now, I will walk you to the gate, to the car which should rightfully be mine. And then I will kiss you goodbye!

  [kisses Clouseau's cheeks] 

  Dreyfus : And then I will have my meeting with the sanity commission, and they will set me free! And then...

  [gets hit in the head with an arrow and turns to Clouseau] 

  Dreyfus : I will kill you!

  [starts choking him] 

  Clouseau : [running away]  Francois! Start the car!

  Dreyfus : [chasing close behind]  KILL YOU! KILL YOU!

• Clouseau : Now then, what do we know? One, that Professor Fassbinder and his daughter have been kidnapped. Two, that someone has kidnapped them. Three, that my hand is on fire.

• [Clouseau has dressed himself as a local doctor/dentist in order to gain access to the gothic castle that is Dreyfus' headquarters; he is now examining Dreyfus for a bad tooth, but accidentally puts his thumb in Dreyfus' eye instead] 

  Dreyfus : OW! My eye!

  Clouseau : Your eye? I thought it was your tooth.

  Dreyfus : Hmm? It IS my tooth!

  Clouseau : I wish you'd make your mind up; I don't normally make castle-calls in the middle of the night yeu kneuw!

• Clouseau : Good evening commissioner. How are you, how is madame and all the little Commissioners?

• Clouseau : This reminds me of my younger days at the Surete police academy. The parallel bars - my speciality. I was something of an athlete, you know. Yes, yes. I was known as the Pavlova of the parallels. Oh, yes.

  [starts swinging on the parallel bars] 

  Clouseau : Yes, it's all coming back now.

  [sings] 

  Clouseau : Ah yes, I remember it...

  [loses grip and falls down the stairs] 

  Clouseau : Aagh! Well, that felt good.

• [Exits a closet after mistaking it for the door out of the room] 

  Clouseau : Most ingenious. The old closet ploy. I really must congratulate you. If there's one thing I do enjoy, it's a good closet ploy.

• Clouseau : Look, there is no need for you to speak unless I ask you a question. What is your name?

  Mr. Shork : I'm Shork, the gardener.

  Clouseau : What is it you do?

  Mr. Shork : I'm the gardener.

  Clouseau : Then why didn't you say that to me in the first place?

  Mr. Shork : I did.

  Clouseau : Don't try to be funny with me, monsieur!

• Clouseau : [on the phone]  Hello, this is Chief Inspector Clouseau. There is a beautiful woman in my bed and a dead man in my bath.

• Clouseau : What did you say your name was?

  Mr. Shork : Shork.

  Clouseau : The cook!

  Mr. Shork : Gardener.

  Clouseau : Ah, now we're getting somewhere!

  [points to the beekeeper] 

  Clouseau : You!

• Clouseau : Oh, yes. It is obvious to my trained eye, that there is much more going on here than meets the ear. Before you are dismissed, Mr. Stiffsticker, I suggest you count your bees. May find one of them is missing.

• Clouseau : You have received a beump on the head.

  Dreyfus : Beump?

  Clouseau : What?

  Dreyfus : You said beump.

  Clouseau : Yes, I know that. It is a large beump. You could receive the concussion from such a beump.

• Clouseau : [after knocking Cato unconscious, goes to answer the phone]  Relax. I'll get it.

• Bar Patron : Something wrong, Ainsley?

  Ainsley Jarvis : No of course not, Bruno. The Inspector here was just warning me that I had to watch my step. You see, back in France, he's known as King of the Tango.

  Clouseau : [shocked]  Tango?

  Ainsley Jarvis : Oh, I'd love to.

• Clouseau : This is a very serious matter, and everyone is this reum is under the suspicions.

  Mr. Bullock : Reum?

  Clouseau : What was that?

  Mr. Bullock : You said 'reum'?

  Clouseau : Yes, I know that!

• Clouseau : I have just received word that former Chief Inspector Dreyfus has escaped from the insane asylum. For some reason, the Deputy Commissioner thinks that he might try to kill me. Obviously, the poor man is crazier than anyone gives him the credits for.

• Clouseau : [chatting with Scotland Yard about sniffing out Dreyfus, who now has Europe's most infamous hitmen working for him]  Of course it won't be easy; nothing worthwhile ever is. That is why I have always failed where others have succeeded.

• Clouseau : A beekeeper who has lost his voice, a cook who thinks he's a gardener, and a witness to a murder.

• Clouseau : [disguised as Dr. Schirtz]  Hello... It's Dr. Schirtz from the village, you know.

• Clouseau : Are you alright, former chief inspector?

• Olga Bariosova : I gave Cato the night off.

  Clouseau : But what has happened to my reum?

• [last lines] 

  Clouseau : Cato! You imbecile, not now Cato!

• [Clouseau is walking through a pitch-black room with a match in his hand; calling out] 

  Clouseau : Is there anybody hiding there in the dark?

• Clouseau : Allow me to assist you.

  Dreyfus : No! I'm fine. Never better. Just a little... a little shaky. Probably the shock of... I mean, the surprise of seeing you here again today.

• Quinlan : You'll need help.

  Clouseau : I prefer to do this alone.

  Quinlan : Yes, but if Dreyfus is what we suspect, he probably has an army behind him.

  Clouseau : No, of course it won't be easy, but nothing worthwhile ever is. That is why I have always failed where others have succeeded.

• Clouseau : Cato my little yellow friend, I'm home!

• Clouseau : Well, until we meet again and the case is solv-ved.

• Olga Bariosova : If you're going to take a bath, I want to take one with you. Darling, it's freezing out here. Let me in.

  Clouseau : [opens the door to the bathroom, Olga kisses Clouseau]  Madame, I arrest you for the murder of the man in this bathtub.

  Olga Bariosova : What?

  Clouseau : And I must warn you that anything you say will be taken down and used in evidence against me. You.

• Clouseau : Well now, I expect you're all wondering why I asked you here

  [steps on Mrs. Japonica's foot. She screams] 

• Clouseau : Mark my words, François. Sinister forces are at work.

• Clouseau : For me, the greater the odds, the greater the shallenge. And, as always, I accept the shallenge. Well, I am off to Munich.

• Clouseau : Out with the bad air, in with the good. Out with the bad air, in with the good. Out, in.

• Mrs. Leverlilly : What is your name?

  Mrs. Leverlilly : Mrs. Leverlilly.

  Clouseau : Mrs. Loveliver.

• Clouseau : That was hell down there.

• Olga Bariosova : Come back to bed.

  Clouseau : Yes, yes, of course. Into the bed, you know.

  Olga Bariosova : And take off those so-silly pajamas.

  Clouseau : You may rest assured you will never see these so-silly pajamas again. That I can assure you.

• Clouseau : [in bed]  That was my voice singing a little song we used to sing in the Resistance to keep up the cou-rage.

  Olga Bariosova : Was it hard for you in the Resistance?

  Clouseau : Very hard, but not as hard as it is now.

  Olga Bariosova : Darling, relax. Resistance is over.

  Clouseau : My darling. Mmm. My beautiful darling.