The Pink Panther Strikes Again (1976)

Herbert Lom: Charles Dreyfus

Photos 

Quotes 

• Clouseau : [after Dreyfus is knocked into the river for a second and third time and Clouseau thinks he is trying to hide that he's upset]  I'm afraid today is just not your day, my friend.

  Dreyfus : [quickly stands up]  Oh, but it is! It is, my "friend" after three, long terrible years it is AT LAST my day! I will not permit, "repeat," not permit anything..."repeat" anything to spoil it. Now, I will walk you to the gate, to the car which should rightfully be mine. And then I will kiss you goodbye!

  [kisses Clouseau's cheeks] 

  Dreyfus : And then I will have my meeting with the sanity commission, and they will set me free! And then...

  [gets hit in the head with an arrow and turns to Clouseau] 

  Dreyfus : I will kill you!

  [starts choking him] 

  Clouseau : [running away]  Francois! Start the car!

  Dreyfus : [chasing close behind]  KILL YOU! KILL YOU!

• [Clouseau has dressed himself as a local doctor/dentist in order to gain access to the gothic castle that is Dreyfus' headquarters; he is now examining Dreyfus for a bad tooth, but accidentally puts his thumb in Dreyfus' eye instead] 

  Dreyfus : OW! My eye!

  Clouseau : Your eye? I thought it was your tooth.

  Dreyfus : Hmm? It IS my tooth!

  Clouseau : I wish you'd make your mind up; I don't normally make castle-calls in the middle of the night yeu kneuw!

• Dreyfus : Every day and in every way, I am getting better, and better.

• Dreyfus : Now this is my plan. Step number one: I will recruit the world's greatest criminal mind. Step number two: I will build an organization so sinister, so powerful, that by comparison La Cosa Nostra will seem like the Vienna Boys' Choir!

• Margo Fassbender : What are you going to do?

  Dreyfus : Something so very, very painful, so hideous, your father will have no choice but to cooperate.

  [puts on a glove, with very sharp claws attached to the finger sockets, and walks to the blackboard] 

  Margo Fassbender : No!

  [Dreyfus nods, and scrapes his clawed glove down the blackbird, making a hideous screeching noise] 

• Clouseau : You have received a beump on the head.

  Dreyfus : Beump?

  Clouseau : What?

  Dreyfus : You said beump.

  Clouseau : Yes, I know that. It is a large beump. You could receive the concussion from such a beump.

• [Refering to the aftermath of the Doomsday device] 

  Dreyfus : What do you suppose they will call the crater, huh? The Dreyfus Ditch?

  Dr. Fassbender : There shall be no crater.

  Dreyfus : No crater? But I want a crater! I want wreckage, twisted metal. Something the world will not forget!

  Dr. Fassbender : They won't forget today.

  Dreyfus : They won't? Wonderful. I have to tinkle again. Don't do anything till I get back.

• Dreyfus : He has pulled the wrong tooth! There's only one man who would pull the wrong tooth. It's Clouseau! Kill him! Kill him!

• Marty the Mugger : You have several of the world's greatest criminal minds right here, in this very room.

  Bruce the Knife : Yeah, why don't we take care of it ourselves?

  Dreyfus : Because you wouldn't stand a chance.

  [Crims murmur disbelief] 

  Dreyfus : You don't know Clouseau.

  Tournier (a.k.a. Tony the bank robber) : He can't be that good.

  Dreyfus : Good? Ha, he's not good, he's terrible; he's the worst. There's not another man like him anywhere in the world. Compared to Clouseau this doomsday machine, it's just a mere water pistol.

• Dr. Fassbender : When can my daughter and I leave?

  Dreyfus : When Clouseau is no more, perhaps.

  Dr. Fassbender : I have done everything you asked.

  Dreyfus : You've done everything I asked so far, but I have not asked everything.

  Dr. Fassbender : What you mean is that you have no intention of letting us go. You plan to continue your reign of terror whether Clouseau is eliminated or not.

  Dreyfus : I must admit the thought had occurred to me.

• Dreyfus : Now we'll see who has the last laugh. They've all betrayed me, and now they will have to pay. What shall I destroy? Buckingham Palace? Too small. How about London? Not big enough. England! Yes, England.

• Clouseau : Allow me to assist you.

  Dreyfus : No! I'm fine. Never better. Just a little... a little shaky. Probably the shock of... I mean, the surprise of seeing you here again today.

• Dreyfus : Compared to Clouseau, this doomsday machine is just a water pistol.

• Psychiatrist : CLOUSEAU!

  Dreyfus : Now Doctor, there are some who would find your methods rather unorthodox.

  Psychiatrist : Just seeing if I am a better Doctor than you are a Detective.

• Dreyfus : Seven. Six. Five. Four. Three. Two. One. Ignition!

  [fires a laser which disintegrates the United Nations building] 

• Dreyfus : No crater? But, I want a crater. I want wreckage! Twisted metal. Something the world will not forget.

  Dr. Fassbender : They will not forget today.

  Dreyfus : They won't? Wonderful! I have to tinkle again. Don't do anything till I get back.

  Dr. Fassbender : Too late. The countdown started. One minute!

• Dr. Fassbender : You are mad.

  Dreyfus : And you are redundant, Professor. Redundant and fallacious!