Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (1982 TV Movie)

Angela Lansbury: Mrs. Lovett

Quotes 

• Sweeney Todd : [singing]  What is that?

  Nellie Lovett : [singing]  It's priest. Have a little priest.

  Sweeney Todd : [singing]  Is it really good?

  Nellie Lovett : [singing]  Sir, it's too good, at least. Then again, they don't commit sins of the flesh, so it's pretty fresh.

  Sweeney Todd : [singing]  Awful lot of fat.

  Nellie Lovett : [singing]  Only where it sat.

  Sweeney Todd : [singing]  Haven't you got... poet, or something like that?

  Nellie Lovett : [singing]  No, you see the trouble with poet is how do you know it's deceased... try the priest!

• Nellie Lovett : Now then, this might be a bit stringy, but then of course it's a fiddle player!

  Sweeney Todd : No, no. This isn't fiddle player- it's PICCOLO player.

  Nellie Lovett : How can you tell?

  Sweeney Todd : It's PIPING hot.

  Nellie Lovett : Then BLOW on it first!

• Sweeney Todd : Later on, when it's dark, we'll take him to some secret place and bury him.

  Nellie Lovett : Well, of course, we could do that. I don't suppose there's any relatives going to come poking around looking for him.

  Nellie Lovett : [pause, as an idea strikes her] 

  Nellie Lovett : [singing]  But... You know me. Sometimes ideas just pop into me head and I keep thinking... Seems a downright shame...

  Sweeney Todd : Shame?

  Nellie Lovett : Seems an awful waste... Such a nice plump frame wot's-his-name has... had... Has... Nor it can't be traced. Business needs a lift - Debts to be erased - Think of it as thrift, as a gift... If you get my drift...

  [Todd stares blankly] 

  Nellie Lovett : No? Seems an awful waste. I mean, with the price of meat what it is, when you get it, IF you get it...

  Sweeney Todd : [Getting the idea]  Ha!

  Nellie Lovett : Good, you got it.

• Sweeney Todd : [singing]  For what's the sound of the world out there?

  Nellie Lovett : [singing]  What, Mr. Todd, what, Mr. Todd, what is that sound?

  Sweeney Todd : [singing]  Those crunching noises pervading the air?

  Nellie Lovett : [singing]  Yes, Mr. Todd, yes, Mr. Todd, yes, all around...

  Sweeney Todd : [singing]  It's man devouring man, my dear,

  Todd, Mrs. Lovett : [singing]  And who are we to deny it in here?

• Nellie Lovett : Since marine doesn't appeal to you, how about Rear Admiral?

  Sweeney Todd : No, no. It's too salty. I prefer... General.

  Nellie Lovett : With or without 'is privates? "With," is extra!

• Nellie Lovett : Lawyer's rather nice.

  Sweeney Todd : It is for a price.

  Nellie Lovett : Order something else, though, to follow since no one should swallow it twice.

  Sweeney Todd : Anything that's lean...

  Nellie Lovett : Well, then, if you're British and loyal, you might enjoy Royal Marine. Anyway, it's clean. Though, of course, it tastes of wherever it's been!

  Sweeney Todd : Is that squire on the fire?

  Nellie Lovett : Mercy, no sir, look closer, you'll notice it's grocer!

  Sweeney Todd : It looks thicker, more like vicar.

  Nellie Lovett : No, it has to be grocer - it's green!

• Nellie Lovett : It's fop. Finest in the shop. Or we have some shepherd's pie peppered with actual shepherd on top! And I've just begun - that's a politician so oily it's served with a doily, not one.

  Sweeney Todd : Put it on a bun. Well, you never know if it's going to run!

• Nellie Lovett : [singing]  Mrs Mooney has a pie shop. Does a business, but I notice something weird - lately all her neighbour's cats have disappeared.

• Nellie Lovett : [singing, after Sweeney Todd has bitten into one of Mrs Lovett's pies]  Is that just disgusting? You have to conceed it. It's nothing but crusting, here drink this - you'll need it.

• Sweeney Todd : [singing]  You there, my friend. Come, let me hold you. Now, with a sigh you grow warm in my hand, my friend, my clever friend. Rest now, my friends. Soon I'll unfold you. Soon you'll know splendors you never have dreamed all your days, my lucky friends. Till now your shine was merely silver. Friends you shall drip rubies...

  Nellie Lovett : [singing] 

  [simultaneously] 

  Nellie Lovett : I'm your friend too, Mr. Todd. If you only knew, Mr. Todd - Ooh, Mr. Todd, you're warm in my hand. You've come home. Always had a fondness for you, I did. Never you fear, Mr. Todd, you can move in here, Mr. Todd. Splendors you never have dreamed All your days will be yours. I'm your friend. Don't they shine beautiful? Silver's good enough for me, Mr. T.

  Sweeney Todd : [singing]  You'll soon drip precious rubies...

  Sweeney Todd : [holds up his razor] 

  Sweeney Todd : [singing]  At last, my right arm is complete again!

• Tobias Ragg : [singing]  No one's gonna hurt you, no one's gonna dare.

  Nellie Lovett : [singing]  I know what Toby deserves...

  Tobias Ragg : [singing]  Others can desert you... not to worry, whistle I'll be there.

  Nellie Lovett : [singing]  Here, have a nice bon-bon...

  Tobias Ragg : [singing]  Demons'll charm you with a smile, for a while, but in time... nothin' can harm you... not while I'm around.

• [last lines] 

  Sweeney Todd : [singing]  Attend the tale of Sweeney Todd...

  Company : [singing]  Attend the tale of Sweeney Todd...

  Sweeney Todd : [singing]  He served a dark and a hungry god...

  Company : [singing]  He served a dark and a hungry god...

  Sweeney Todd : [singing]  To seek revenge may lead to Hell...

  Nellie Lovett : [singing]  But everyone does it, and seldom as well as Sweeney...

  Company : [singing]  As Sweeney Todd...

  All : [singing]  The demon barber of Fleet... Street...

• Sweeney Todd : [singing]  Have charity towards the world, my pet.

  Nellie Lovett : [singing]  Yes, yes, I know, my love.

  Sweeney Todd : [singing]  We'll take the customers that we can get.

  Nellie Lovett : [singing]  High-born and and low, my love.

  Sweeney Todd : [singing]  We'll not discriminate great from small. No, we'll serve anyone...

  Sweeney Todd , Nellie Lovett : [singing together]  - meaning anyone, and to anyone, at all!

• Nellie Lovett : [singing "By the Sea"]  All alone in our nest we could share our kippers / With the odd paying guest from the weekend trippers / With a nice sunny suite for the guests to rest in / Now and then, you could do a guest in / By the seeeeeeea...

• Sweeney Todd : [during a sit-down in the parlor]  There must be a way to the judge.

  Nellie Lovett : Bloody ol' judge, always harpin' on the bloody ol' judge. 'ere we've got a nice respectable business goin'!

• Nellie Lovett : You got any money? Listen to me! You got any money?

  Sweeney Todd : No money.

  Nellie Lovett : Then how you going to live even?

  Sweeney Todd : I'll live. If I have to sweat in the sewers or in the plague hospital, I'll live - and I'll have them!