Louie Bluie (1985)

Howard Armstrong: Self

Quotes 

• Howard Armstrong : He was so greedy after women, he was like a one eyed cat watchin' two rat holes.

• Howard Armstrong : I met this young lady in 1932 who was an undertaker's daughter. So, she invite me to see her father's undertaker shop. Then, she begin to explain to me about all the different coffins, a half coach or a full, coach. All that I didn't like anyway; because, I wasn't interested in death nor dying. So, one night she came to a party where we were playing. At that time, my group was called the Four Keys. And, so, she was a little tipsy so she walked over to each member and she walked over to Mr. Martin, she says, "I know who you are. You are Duke Ellington." And so she came to Bogan, the guitar player, and says, "You are Ted Lewis." Then, she started over to me and she says, "You are Armstrong. I know you are Armstrong, but, you are not Louis Armstrong. That Louis. You're just plain old Louie Bluie. That's what you are." And so, I use the name to record under later.

• Howard Armstrong : I've been exposed to music all my life. The town that I grew up in was called LaFollette, Tennessee. There were 11 of us in the family. All those older than me could play some instrument. So, I started off playin' music by listenin' to my dad and he gave me some instructions on the mandolin and whatnot. Because, after he got into the preachin' business, they decided, he and his church members that that was the devil's instrument. It wasn't becoming for a minister to play string music, so, he threw his old mandolin in my lap.

• [first lines] 

  Howard Armstrong : I don't know whether its a liability or an asset; because, sometimes I feel like I'm three or four different people. I want to paint awhile and I just burn with that - just to paint, paint, paint, paint. Then, that cools off and then I wanna play by music, you know. That cool off, I wanna write poetry, I wanna do this, I wanna do something else. Actually, I feel sometimes like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

• Howard Armstrong : Women fell for the dude head over hills. We used to call him Mr. Black Gable.

• Howard Armstrong : There was different ethnic groups here in this part of Tennessee where I was. And they had, of course, Jim Crow discriminatory practices and what not. We weren't supposed to cross over the line; but, bein' little kids then, we did. I played with the little Italians, the little Hungarians, the little Polish kids, you know. Well, I was a speakin' better Italian, grammatically, than I was English. And so, when I first came to Chicago in the 30s, it served me in good stead. Mine was the only black group that go among these different ethnic groups, because, I could make out in speakin' the language and also playin' the type of music most them liked.

• Howard Armstrong : I cried and screamed like a wallow cat. Mama had to drag me to the woodshed and lambasted me.

• Howard Armstrong : During that time there was a whole lot of black fiddlers who could really play. But, they couldn't get in to compete with the white fiddle players. Never could. Never let me get in on a fiddlers contest. And they were guys in fiddlin' and scrapin' - couldn't play a damn enough music to keep the flies off a dog dick.

• Howard Armstrong : They called on me. They gonna have a recitation by Master William Howard Armstrong. You know what I mean? That was me! Mama just looked back and smiled so pretty, you know. It was like: You tell 'em, Tiger. You know, all the kids were very happy because they know they were gonna hear somethin' unusual, at least, different, you know. I got out with my little Boy Scout shoes on, you know. And got the right stance, like I was Abraham Lincoln, you know. And I even addressed the faculty, student body, and friends. I says, "I'm gonna talk about a bird, but, its a different bird. Its not gonna be a sandpiper. One that you all familiar with." Mama nodded, "You tell 'em, son." I reared back, that old woman was just beamin' with pride. I said, "The woodpecker flew to the school house yard, He wanted to peck because his pecker was hard, The woodpecker flew to the school house door, He pecked so long tell his pecker got sore." Then, they were gettin' up. I saw 'em gettin' up. "The woodpecker he pecked so all night to the break of day, When the sun rose up he flew away." About that time they had me by the ear, by the feet, even old man Parks had me. They all up like to beat all the hide off of me, man. That was the last time, I think, appearin' on Sunday school.

• Howard Armstrong : My poor old mother was sittin' back there and some other parents and that old chicken-eatin' preacher, the Reverend Parks, I didn't like him very well.

• Howard Armstrong : A lot of people didn't care too much about Jesus cause he was too humble and meek. Who in the funk cares about somebody noddin' his damn head when a guy's gettin' ready to kick his ass.

• Howard Armstrong : [looking at the Chicago Picasso]  I'd hate to wake up anywhere and see that. You know, night time, day time, Summer time, Winter, any other time. You see, I'm a realist. If you are going to an artist, paint somethin' that looks like somethin' at least you can relate to. That - I don't know. It's just like somethin' that jumped out of the Twilight Zone. That's the way I feel about it. A whole lot of money, a big bunch of bull shit went down the drain. You know what I mean? You could pick that up most anywhere. You know, it may not be quite as big as that, just put it right together and pile it on deeper. I don't think the people who got it - they know what the hell they were doin' in the first place.

• Howard Armstrong : I'm not ashamed to tell anybody my age. I am 75 years - not old, but - 75 years young. Because I have most of the attributes that young men should have. I have interest in life and full of energy, full of pep, and most of all, I'm full of curiosity. Because, that is one thing that keeps you young.

• Howard Armstrong : Preachers are a regular legalized pimp. Start talkin' about hell and damnation and lookin' right dead in the sisters drawers.

• Howard Armstrong : [singing]  When skies are cloudy and gray, They only gray for a day, Wrap your troubles in dreams, Dream all your troubles away, Wait for that old sun to shine thru, you know, Nothing really more that you can do, Wrap your troubles in dreams, Dream your troubles away...

• Howard Armstrong : I'm doing with my life. Every morning that I get up, that is my life. And whatever activity for the day I want to get in, that's what I get into.

• Howard Armstrong : That what we call Seatopygic and thats what mean you have a lot of fat in your gluteus maximus, you know. You're buttock, you see. The women in this country, especially of African origin, they have a lot of fat behind, you know. Some of them stick out so damn far you can put a saddle on 'em and ride, you know. A guy told me he said a certain part of his anatomy, when he looked at one of those women stickin' out, he got harder than a Chinese arithmetic problem.

• Howard Armstrong : Now, that's the man there. He's the biggest pimp of all. That's the devil! I don't care how good you feel or what you're feelin' for, when he says 'checkmate' my man, its all over.

• Howard Armstrong : A lot of people think that pornography is somthin' vicious or ugly and all like that. But, it is a basic part of our life, believe it or not.

• Howard Armstrong : I organized a little string band. I played the fiddle and my brother Rowland played homemade bass my Dad made out of a goods box. My brother Ellsie played the guitar and Ephraim, the baby boy, six years old, he played the banjolele or ukulele. My band played all the same kinds of jobs as other black string bands did in those days. We would play for outings, picnics, fish fries. Our biggest plays were done for the elite of white people, you know, the upper crust, as we used to say.

• Howard Armstrong : The first string bands that I came in contact with were just local bands in the hills around LaFollette. And they were made up of fellas who even worked in the mine. Dell Cole worked at the Blast Furnace. Most of the string bands composed just whatever came to hand. They had mandolin, fiddles, guitar. Once in awhile, you would see a sax player. They didn't feel that they belonged in a string band. Black musicians play so many things, stove pipe, cue sticks, broom handles, jugs. I mean, could really blow a jug.

• Howard Armstrong : We couldn't play the blues, you know, for the white people. We learned how to play the pop songs, you know, like "Brown Eyes Why Are You Blue". If you came out there playin' some low-down blues, they'd pack up and leave, either, you'd have to pack up and run. Because, they put some heat on you that you couldn't stand.

• Howard Armstrong : I don't know what the heck is comin'. I just I must be gonna wind up in the Twilight Zone.