Revenge of the Nerds IV: Nerds in Love (1994 TV Movie)

James Cromwell: Mr. Skolnick

Photos 

Quotes 

• Mr. Skolnick : How's my unborn grandson?

  Lewis Skolnick : You mean you're unborn fetal son?

  [laughs] 

• Takashi : The bishop has a kidney stone, he no make it to wedding!

  Dudley Dawson : How am I supposed to get married without a clergyman?

  Mr. Skolnick : I could marry you.

  Dudley Dawson : But I don't love you.

• Lewis Skolnick : [Mr. Skolnick's car pulls into the driveway]  Dad!

  Dudley Dawson : U.N.!

  Mr. Skolnick : [Mr. Skolnick and U.N. get out of the car]  Hey, how are you?

  U. N. Jefferson : [Lewis hugs his dad, U.N. shakes hands with Booger]  Congratulations, Booger, congratulations!

  Dudley Dawson : Thank you.

  U. N. Jefferson : I wouldn't miss a nerd wedding for the world.

  U. N. Jefferson : [greets Lewis, Mr. Skolnick greets Booger]  How are you?

  Mr. Skolnick : How's my unborn grandson?

  Lewis Skolnick : You mean your unborn fetal son?

  [Lewis and his dad guffaw together] 

  Takashi : Emergency! Excuse please, the bishop has a kidney stone, he no make it to wedding!

  Dudley Dawson : What? How am I supposed to get married without a clergyman?

  Mr. Skolnick : I can marry you.

  Dudley Dawson : But I don't love you.

  Mr. Skolnick : Oh- No, no, I took a correspondence course, I'm a fully ordained Tilhoonian minister.

  U. N. Jefferson : You are?

  Mr. Skolnick : U.N.

  [Takashi, Booger, Lewis and his dad all guffaw together, while U.N. Jefferson stands quietly surprised, not getting the pun] 

• Betty Skolnick : [Betty has just given birth to her baby, and she cries tears of joy]  Oh, oh, it's so beautiful.

  Lewis Skolnick : [holds his newborn baby]  Our son is born. Kunta Skolnick!

  Mr. Skolnick : [holds his grandson for all to see]  Behold, the nerd child.

• Mr. Skolnick : I see before me two souls who desire to be joined together. There's no greater challenge in life, and also no greater reward.

  Mr. Skolnick : [Mr. Skolnick guffaws; U.N. Jefferson, Ogre, and Travis cry for joy]  Do you, Dudley Dawson, take this woman, Jean Lagarde Humphrey, to be your lawful wife?

  Dudley Dawson : [to Jean]  Before I answer that, I just want to say... this is the happiest moment of my life.

  Dudley Dawson : [faces Mr. Skolnick]  I do.

  Mr. Skolnick : And do you, Jean Lagarde Humphrey, take this man, Dudley Dawson, to be your lawfully wedded husband?

  Jeanie Humphrey : Excuse me.

  [Jeanie turns to Dudley] 

  Jeanie Humphrey : I'm going to love you till the end of time.

  [faces Mr. Skolnick] 

  Jeanie Humphrey : I do.

  Mr. Skolnick : Then, with the power invested in me by the Tilhoon Institute of Home Learning Church, I now pronounce you husband and wife.

  [Mr. Skolnick guffaws; the wedding guests applaud] 

  Mylan Whitfield : [Dudley and Jeanie have a celebratory kiss]  Nerds forever! Forever nerds!

  [Mylan stands up] 

  Mylan Whitfield : Nerds! Nerds!

  Mylan Whitfield , Everybody : Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds!