Men in Black II (2002)

David Cross: Newton

Photos 

Quotes 

• Newton : A neuralize...

  Agent J : [neuralizes Newton]  Ok. First, get some contact lenses, 'cause those joints look like they could pick up cable. Second, take her to Cambodia, get her a lobster dinner. Pay more than a dollar. Third, the second y'all get back from Cambodia, move your bum ass outta your mom's house. Boy, you like 40 years old.

  Kevin Brown/K : Agent J?

  Agent J : All right, all right. Oh, and there ain't no such thing as aliens or Men in Black.

  [J leaves] 

  Newton : You wanna go to Cambodia?

  Hailey : Yeah.

  Newton : Hey, Mom?

  [picks up a shovel] 

• Newton : [to Hailey]  There's a huge rat in the toilet, it's all stopped up so you're gonna have to pee in the sink...

  [spots agents J & K] 

  Newton : Gentlemen! Seen any... aliens lately?

  Agent K : Son, you need professional help.

  Hailey : He's getting it, it's not working.

• Newton : Guys, before we start the tape, one more thing - what's up with anal probing? I mean, do they really come billions of light years just to...

  Agent J : Boy, MOVE!

• Newton's Mother : [from downstairs]  Newton! What are you doing up there?

  Newton : I'm up in my room with some friends, Mom!

  Hailey : I want to have your baby.

• Newton : You want some mini-pizzas? It's just... mini-bagels with pizza stuff on them. You want some cheese on them? She can put a little Fontina on it. She has Palsy and ends up putting a whole lot on...

  [J and K stare at Ben] 

  Newton : [calling to his mother]  No, thanks, we're cool!