Faerie Tale Theatre (TV Series)

Aladdin and His Wonderful Lamp (1986)

Robert Carradine: Aladdin

Quotes 

• Aladdin : Where do you come from?

  Genie : Originally?

  [Aladdin nods] 

  Genie : I was born from the thundering wind, that blew from the mouth of the Great White Bear, who came from the fiery yellow Sun, who is the eye of the all-powerful being whose name I am forbidden to speak! And you are?

  Aladdin : Aladdin. I... was born from Mustafa the tailor. And that's my mother there, passed out from fright.

  Genie : [laughs]  Amusing!

• Aladdin : If you can't build what I want...

  Genie : You dare insult me? Why? I can build the finest palace in the whole of the universe!

  Aladdin : Great! Have it done tomorrow.

  Genie : Tomorrow? Tomorrow? Monday?

  Aladdin : Uh, yes, that's right.

  Genie : Why, I should take your miserable little head and crush it in my hand like an insect, and spread it on the sand it does not deserve to return to!

  Aladdin : What'd I say?

  Genie : MONDAY! It is a day of rest for all genies! We neither work, nor sleep, nor play; we simply rest!

  Aladdin : Tuesday will be fine.

  Genie : [laughs]  As you wish.

• Genie : Now, what is it you request, O Aladdin of humble birth?

  Aladdin : Well, I'm very hungry.

  Genie : Food? You ask for food from me, who can create mountains from valleys and oceans from deserts?

  Aladdin : I'm sorry, all I can think of is food.

  Genie : [laughs]  Your wish is my command.

• Genie : What do you need?

  Aladdin : I need a gift for the Sultan.

  Genie : Gold! In the twinkling of an eye, I shall fill the palace with a mountain of gold.

  Aladdin : No, no, it must be something that's more...

  Genie : Jewels! With the snap of my tremendous fingers, I shall create a diamond the size of the moon.

  Aladdin : No, it must be something that he...

  Genie : Silver! Easily done!

  Aladdin : Will you listen?

  Genie : Don't you dare speak to me in that tone of voice!

• Aladdin : Could you return to your lamp, so that I might revive my mother, who's frightened of your presence?

  Genie : What if I refuse? What if I choose instead to rearrange the features of your young face?

• The Evil Moroccan Magician : When I heard of my brother's death, I came as quickly as possible.

  Aladdin : My father's been dead a long time.

  The Evil Moroccan Magician : I was very, very far away.

• Aladdin : The Grand Vizier is gonna marry Princess Sabrina, and I want...

  Genie : And you want to give them a beautiful wedding gift! Very well!

  Aladdin : No, no! I wanted to marry her, and something went wrong...

  Genie : I see! You want me to kill you, and put you out of your misery! As you wish!

  Aladdin : No! Please listen!

  Genie : [laughs]  Your wish is my command.

• The Evil Moroccan Magician : You must do exactly as I say! Drop into this hole into the cave below. You'll go through a long, narrow passageway. Do not touch the walls! If you do, you'll die instantly! At the end of the passageway, you'll come to a large, shadowy room with two large fruit trees. Continue beyond those trees; on top of a gargoyle pedestal, you'll find a lamp. You bring this lamp to me, my friend, and we'll be rich beyond our wildest dreams!

  Aladdin : Listen, you know exactly where it is, why don't you go? I'll wait here, I promise.

  The Evil Moroccan Magician : You idiot! I'm your uncle! Now go!

• Aladdin : I'm in a hurry. I need an imaginative gadget.

  Genie : Such as?

  Aladdin : Well, you're the genie. You must have an idea. Think of something!

  Genie : Nope. I have great powers, but very little imagination.

• The Evil Moroccan Magician : [seeing Aladdin's mother]  Oh! You must be--oh, what an honor! And so beautiful!

  Aladdin's Mother : Aladdin, who is your friend?

  Aladdin : He's my long-lost uncle, Mother.

  The Evil Moroccan Magician : And this must be the place where my dear departed brother reclined. I must sit in it. No--it's a hallowed spot. Such a tragedy that he's gone!

  [weeps] 

  Aladdin's Mother : In all the years I was married to Mustafa, he never mentioned a brother.

  The Evil Moroccan Magician : I'm not surprised; we didn't get along.

• Genie : At last! Fresh air!

  Aladdin : Who are you?

  Genie : Who am I? You ask WHO AM I? I am the genie of the lamp! And being bottled up for thousands of years has made me extremely short-tempered. So I ask you, how do you wish to die?

  Aladdin : I don't wish to die!

  Genie : [laughs]  Good answer. Not to worry! I cannot kill you! You are now my master, and I am here to grant you any wish that you may desire.

• Aladdin : What are you doing out of your lamp?

  Genie : Relaxing! Stretching! Breathing the fresh air!

• Aladdin : I want you to go to the palace tomorrow, and tell the Sultan I wish to marry his daughter, Mother.

  Aladdin's Mother : Oh, I think I prefer to stay alive instead, Aladdin.

• Aladdin : I thought genies were just...

  Genie : Imaginary? Sometimes, but I am very real.

• Genie : What is it you desire?

  Aladdin : I'm not sure.

  Genie : Those who are not sure are surely nothing at all.

• Genie : What's wrong with this house?

  Aladdin : Everything! It's small, it's cramped, it's shabby!

  Genie : It's a palace compared to a lamp!

• Aladdin : I'm starving. Can I have something to eat, please?

  Aladdin's Mother : Of course. I have a bean and a fig. Which would you prefer?

• Aladdin : Now if you'd be so kind, I'd like you to...

  Genie : Transport you and your palace back to where it belongs, of course!

  Aladdin : You still haven't learned to listen, have you?

  [the genie laughs] 

  Aladdin : You can take the palace back, but the Princess and I, we'd like to take the carpet, if you don't mind.

  Genie : I don't mind!

• Genie : My little master! What took you so long? Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get so emotional. How may I serve you?

  Aladdin : Well, you can start by disposing of that.

  The Evil Moroccan Magician : I wouldn't be in too much of a hurry...

• Aladdin : Do you mind if I ask you a question? Do you believe in love at first sight?

  Princess Sabrina : Well, I believe in love. Now can I ask you a question? Where am I?

  Aladdin : Oh, you're in my room.

  Princess Sabrina : How did I get here?

  Aladdin : In a stream of pink smoke. Just call it magic.

  Princess Sabrina : Oh, you're a magician?

  Aladdin : Me? No, I have a friend who's a magician. Uh, he's not exactly a magician; he's real similar.

• Aladdin : Mother, mother, mother! I'm in love and I want to get married.

  Aladdin's Mother : Praise be to Allah! My son's become a man! And who is the fortunate young maiden?

  Aladdin : She's the most beautiful woman in the world! Princess Sabrina, daughter of the Sultan.

  Aladdin's Mother : Oh son, dear son. She's royalty; you're... not. The two shall never entwine.

• Sultan : Oh, Aladdin! How was your journey? You were missed, my son.

  Aladdin : Speaking of missing, have you seen my palace?

  Sultan : [laughs]  Oh, how you amuse me! Your palace is where it has always been, right over there.

  [looks] 

  Sultan : Well, it was there this morning. What have you done with your palace, Aladdin?

• Aladdin : Would you care to join me?

  Genie : Oh, I am flattered, my tiny master, but genies do not eat. Never have, never will!

• Aladdin's Mother : No, no, no. I don't want it around the house. Get rid of it!

  Aladdin : But Mother, it's a magic lamp with a real genie inside.

  Aladdin's Mother : Genie! Looks like a nightmare to me.

  Aladdin : Please, can't I keep it?

  Aladdin's Mother : No!

  Aladdin : But I'll take care of it, I promise!

  Aladdin's Mother : Oh, very well.

  Aladdin : Thanks mom!

  Aladdin's Mother : Keep it out of my sight!

• Aladdin : I want you to get the princess, and bring her here, so that I may speak with her.

  Genie : [chuckles]  I'm listening.

  Aladdin : And then I want you to take the Grand Vizier to... someplace else, and keep him there till morning.

  Genie : May I scare him?

  Aladdin : Just don't kill him.

  Genie : [laughs] 

• Princess Sabrina : No boy has ever really looked at me before.

  Aladdin : Well, what do you expect? It's punishable by death to see the princess in daylight.

  Princess Sabrina : It is? Oh, well that explains it.