Waiting... (I) (2005)

Alanna Ubach: Naomi

Photos 

Quotes 

• Naomi : Like that bitch needs to be eating dessert anyway.

  Bishop : Naomi... You know, if you ever want counseling in anger management or... alcoholism, I'd be more than glad to do it for you.

  Naomi : You'd do that for me? Thank you, I appreciate that. But I think I'd rather you just wash the fucking dishes and and shut the fuck up! Fucking psychobabble-bullshit asshole!

• Naomi : I hate this fucking place sometimes, you know. Why the fuck do we need four more people on at this time of day, man? Look at this place, it's fucking dead! I swear, Dan needs to clean the *shit* out of his fucking brain sometimes, man. Fucking asshole. What are you looking at, fuck-wad?

• Naomi : You really want to know why?

  Monty : Yes I really do.

  Naomi : Ok Ill tell you why. Its because of THIS!

  [jumps on the barstool and lifts her skirt] 

  Calvin , Mitch , Monty : OH! MY GOD!

  Naomi : Yea! Bang! Pow! Pow! Pow!

  Monty : Its so angry!

  Naomi : [screeches and hisses like cat] 

  Calvin : Oh GOD does that thing have its shots? Put it away! Just put iy away!

  Naomi : Dinner is served!

  Calvin : Well its official, my penis is now just for show.

  Monty : Mitch you picked a FUCKED up night to start working here.

• Naomi : I FUCKING HATE FOREIGNERS!

• Natasha : Dean.

  Dean : What?

  Natasha : The old lady at Table 37 wants you to sing the birthday song for her grandson. His name is Timmy, and he's eight years old.

  Dean : [tosses a cake with Happy Birthday onto the counter from the box]  I need birthday singers!

  Monty : Come on, people! We need birthday singers!

  Naomi : Fuck.

  Dean : [the gang walk toward Table 37, clapping and cheering. Dean holds out the cake and brings it to the table, spotting Timmy]  There he is. There's the big winner.

  [sets the cake onto the table where Timmy is] 

  Monty : [excitedly]  Yeah!

  Dean : All right. Attention, guests! Today's a very special occasion. It's Timmy's eighth birthday! Big round of applause.

  [the guests cheer and applaud] 

  Dean : He's earned it. He's got his whole life ahead of him. The sky's the limit.

  Dean : [singing]  I don't know but I've been told.

  Monty , Amy , Naomi , Serena , Calvin : [singing]  Someone here is getting old!

  Dean : [singing, Timmy looks frightened]  Good news is dessert is free.

  Monty , Amy , Naomi , Serena , Calvin : [singing]  Bad news is we sing off-key!

  Dean : [singing]  Happy birthday...

  Dean , Monty , Amy , Naomi , Serena , Calvin : [point to Timmy, in unison]  TO YOU!

  [Timmy starts crying in embarrassment, the waiters applaud and cheer. One of them holds up Timmy's arm and waves it in the air] 

  Natasha : Look at the camera!

  [holding a camera] 

  Dean : Picture time.

  [the camera snaps and we're revealed the photograph of all the waiters and Timmy posed for the picture, Timmy still cries in the background as this happens] 

  Dean : All right. All right. Cry it off.

• Naomi : Ok I'll tell you why. It's because of THIS!

  [jumps on the barstool and lifts her skirt]