Monster-in-Law (2005)

Jane Fonda: Viola Fields

Photos 

Quotes 

• Viola Fields : [Leaning on car]  That little bitch. Come on, Ruby. Let's go to the beach and drink wine.

  Ruby : [Grunts while putting in luggage] 

  Viola Fields : What's wrong, Ruby?

  Ruby : You know exactly what!

  [Picks up luggage] 

  Ruby : Move.

  Viola Fields : Ruby, what's wrong?

  Ruby : I am sick! I am sick, sick, sick of your shit! And when I'm not sick, I'm tired! I am sick and tired!

  Viola Fields : What are you trying to say?

  Ruby : [closes trunk]  Damn you and your luggage!

  [rushes to car] 

  Viola Fields : [rushes to car]  Ruby? Ruby? Ruby, you're not going to leave me like everyone else, are you?

  Ruby : Of course not! You old slut!

• Viola Fields : I cannot believe she compared me to Gertrude!

  Ruby : I know. Now, that's just wrong.

  Viola Fields : Thank you.

  Ruby : You are far worse. I don't recall Gertrude ever trying to poison you. And I'm pretty sure she wore black to your wedding.

  Viola Fields : Black. Yeah, she said she was in mourning. I just want my son to be happy.

  Ruby : Whatever made you think he wasn't?

• Viola Fields : That slut is practically throwing herself on him!

  Ruby : I don't blame her, that boy's one fine piece of ass!

• Charlotte 'Charlie' Cantilini : And about the holidays...

  Viola Fields : Are you gonna keep me away?

  Charlotte 'Charlie' Cantilini : You must be present for every Christmas, Thanksgiving, birthday, school play, clarinet recital, and soccer game in our kids' lives. I want you to love them, and spoil them and teach them things that Kevin and I can't. Like how to throw a right hook for example. I want you there, Viola. I do, up front and center. From this point i will not negotiate.

  Ruby : Damn, that girl can give a nice little speech!

• Viola Fields : [Ruby and Viola arguing at the car]  What's wrong with you?

  Ruby : I am sick. I am sick, sick, sick of your shit. And when I'm not sick, I'm tired. I am sick and tired!

• Viola Fields : What do you do for fun?

  Pop Star : I love watching really old movies. They're my favorite.

  Viola Fields : Really? Really? Which ones?

  Pop Star : Well, "Grease" and "Grease II." Um, "Benji." I love "Benji." "Free Willy," um..."Legally Blonde," "The Little Mermaid."

• Viola Fields : I thought you were dead, but evil doesn't die so easily.

• Viola Fields : Let's go someplace near the ocean and drink lunch.

• Viola Fields : [after asking the question about what the pop star likes to do for fun]  Do you ever read a newspaper?

  Ruby : [in control room]  Newspaper? Viola, the girl got stars on her nipples.

  Pop Star : [laughs while talking]  I dont have much time for that.

  Viola Fields : So what you're saying is that you dont know what's going on in the world. And yet you've sold over

  [looks down at card] 

  Viola Fields : 39 million albums. CDs. And millions of kids listen to your lyrics. "If you wanna know me, look inside my make-up bag". You're influencing an entire population of kids who won't know how to think straight. Or how to vote for a president. Or understand the significance of Roe vs Wade.

  Pop Star : Oh!

  [laughs] 

  Pop Star : I don't support boxing as a sport. I think it's too violent.

  Ruby : Y'all better get that little girl outta there.

  Viola Fields : AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

  [Throws herself on pop star] 

• Viola Fields : [Walks out of institution]  Ruby, oh, my dearest friend. I've missed you so much.

  Ruby : Well, good. They still got you medicated.

• Viola Fields : [blows airhorn]  I'm sorry! I thought it was air freshener!

• Viola Fields : Marriage is a sacred union which must only be entered with the utmost care.

  Charlotte 'Charlie' Cantilini : Weren't you married four times?

• Ruby : Charlie's face will blow up like a balloon!

  Viola Fields : Good, then it will match the rest of her body.

• Charlotte 'Charlie' Cantilini : Where's your bridesmaid dress?

  Viola Fields : Oh, I gave it to Ruby's daughter, she works at Hooters, she was thrilled.

  Ruby : [listening from outside door]  I have a daughter?

• Viola Fields : [noticing Charlie's necklace]  why the question mark?

  Charlotte 'Charlie' Cantilini : Oh, 'cause I just don't know.

• Viola Fields : The flower girls are drunk again!

• Viola Fields : Ruby, Ruby. Everybody knows that when a woman marries a man she marries his mother, too. What if I drive her crazy?

  Ruby : Ok, now you're foaming at the mouth.