- Chuck Taylor: Don't hurt me, man.
- Horny the Clown: Hurt you? I'm not gonna hurt you. I'm just gonna bash your brains in. I'm gonna bash 'em right the fuck in!
- Mackenzie Carpenter: How many times do I have to tell you? I was being chased by a seven foot tall Horny the Clown with a meat cleaver!
- Robbie, The Hella-Burger Manager: You better control your friends or they're gonna end up in the hoosgow!
- Carrie: [puzzled] The what?
- Radio Announcer: Hella Burger is Hella Good!