Alfred Hitchcock Presents (TV Series)

The Diplomatic Corpse (1957)

Alfred Hitchcock: Self - Host

Quotes 

• [introduction] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : [Two men looking like Hitchcock in large sombreros covering their faces are sitting asleep and snoring away on opposite ends of a huge hardcover book with its text block facing the camera; the real Hitchcock on the left of the book wakes up and turns to the audience]  Good evening, senors and senoras, and members of our little "Book of the Week" club. Originally, I was to play a different role, but I proved to be a rather bulky bookmark.

  [gets up] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : Tonight's little volume takes us to exotic nearby Mexico, home of the tortilla, the bullfight, and the 40-hour coffee break. It is called, "The Diplomatic Corpse". Allow me.

  [goes to book and opens the cover, then looks back at the audience] 

• [afterword] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : [Hitchcock is now sitting on the right of the book with his sombrero off and the other fake Hitchcock sleeping on the other side]  Oh well, what can you expect from people who go out in the noonday sun? This of course was not the end of our travelogue. The Wallaces eventually recovered Mrs Tait's body, but this only led to another dilemma. Mrs Tait had always scorned the beauties of burial in Southern California, nor could they afford to ship her back to England. So they did the next best thing and had her buried at sea.

  [puts on sombrero preparing to continue his siesta] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : By the way, you probably think I'm Alfred Hitchcock.

  [points to other Hitchcock] 

  Alfred Hitchcock : He's Alfred. I am Omega. Good night.

  [goes to sleep]