- Oglethorpe: Get the Universal Remonster. He knows how to do it.
- Frylock: He's dead.
- Oglethorpe: Impossible! The Remonster can only be killed by stabbing him in the heart with the ancient bone saber of Zumacalis!
- Emory: Or maybe his head and lungs too. Just stab him wherever.
- Oglethorpe: And the saber probably doesn't have to be bone.
- Emory: Yeah, just anything sharp lying around the house.
- Oglethorpe: You could poke him with a pillow and kill him.
- [Frylock puts the TV in the crawlspace]
- Frylock: You know, I think I've finally found a good use for the TV.
- Master Shake: You put that right back upstairs!
- Frylock: No.
- Master Shake: Well, then, you help me move down my chair down here so I can watch it. HERE!
- Frylock: No, I won't.
- Master Shake: Uh... well... I will pee all over my pants, and THEN who's gonna end up looking bad? Huh?
- Frylock: You just stay down here with your TV and f*cking shove it.
- Master Shake: [calls after Frylock] ... Well, maybe I WILL!
- Oglethorpe: [Emory keeps calling saying "Stargate"] IT IS A FARGATE! From the makers of Findependence Day! We will give it a mohawk and wheelchair if you need help.
- Frylock: Shake, did you hear those chains rattling?
- Master Shake: Oh, did that frighten YOU? Hey, check this out!
- [the Universal Remonster throws a chain into Meatwad's room]
- Meatwad: AHHHHHHHH! no, the chains! FROM MY DREAMS!
- Meatwad: [after being terrorized by Shake using the Remonster to thrash all his stuff around] Hey, did y'all see a ghost pass through here? 'Cause I been hoping like hell that he's gone...
- Master Shake: He probably went to the store to get some more food for his demons.
- Meatwad: Ohh, are you serious?
- Master Shake: You DO know where the demon food store is, right?
- Meatwad: What are you talking about?
- Master Shake: It's right BEHIND YOU!
- Meatwad: [horrified] OHHHHH NOOO!
- Master Shake: You're IN IT!
- Meatwad: I'M IN THE STORE?
- Master Shake: You're in the demon produce aisle!
- [Meatwad runs screaming from the house]
- [Oglethorpe hits Emory with a lamp]
- Emory: Ow! Damn! You hit me in the chin!
- Oglethorpe: Oh, sorry, I thought you were a ghoul.
- Emory: Well, I'm not.
- Oglethorpe: Well, it was your own damn fault for making noises like a ghoul.
- Emory: Dude, I was flushing the toilet!
- Oglethorpe: Ghouls do that.
- [pause]
- Oglethorpe: When they're making brownies.
- Emory: Well, uh...
- Oglethorpe: Shh! Did you hear that? He's in the attic now. He'll kill us. Get the kitchen knife!
- Emory: Uh, the kitchen is *in* the attic.
- Oglethorpe: Well, great, then he has the knife now!
- Frylock: Does either one of you know the penalty for stealing cable?
- Oglethorpe: Ca-ble? Pfffft. We have technology light years beyond your comprehension. Observe... the light stick!
- [shakes a broken lamp around]
- Oglethorpe: It's not working, Emory! I don't know what's wrong with it.
- Emory: You broke it on my head, dude.
- Emory: I figure, maybe we should call him the Universal Remobot, because?
- Oglethorpe: No! The T-Shirts already say Universal Remonster! Not, Universal Re-Piece-of-Crap, like you would!
- Emory: [indicating Universal Remonster T-shirt] Is that, like, a Powerpuff Girl, or something?
- Oglethorpe: No! Can you not see she has a pink mohawk and a wheelchair? We're not getting sued.