- Capt. Barney Miller: Get this things. Have them analyzed and fast.
- [Harris takes a bite out of a brownie]
- Capt. Barney Miller: Not *that* way!
- Det. Ron Harris: I think they got hash in 'em, Barn.
- Capt. Barney Miller: *Hash?*
- Det. Ron Harris: I mean the way that I *feel*.
- Capt. Barney Miller: Stay home until you feel better.
- Det. Ron Harris: Okay Barn, I'll stay, but I ain't never gonna feel no better.
- Det. Sgt. Nick Yemana: [feeling effects of the brownies] Look. See you dunk 'em and they get nice and mooshy. Good word mooshy. Mooshy. Mooshy. Mooshy.
- Det. Sgt. Nick Yemana: [feeling the effects of the brownies] Barney, Barney, Barney... was your mother from Killarney?
- Det. Stan 'Wojo' Wojciehowicz: Want a home-made brownie?
- Det. Sgt. Nick Yemana: Did you make 'em?
- Det. Stan 'Wojo' Wojciehowicz: No.
- Det. Sgt. Nick Yemana: Okay.
- Det. Sgt. Nick Yemana: [feeling the effects of the brownies] Hey. What do you guys say we go down to the beach and shoot some clams?
- Det. Sgt. Nick Yemana: Have you seen my legs?
- [holds arms out]
- Det. Sgt. Nick Yemana: They're this long. They've got 10 toes, one of them's busted.