Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV Series)

Pangs (1999)

Sarah Michelle Gellar: Buffy Summers

Photos 

Quotes 

• Buffy Summers : Wil, you know how bad I feel about this. Okay? It's eating me up...

  [to Anya] 

  Buffy Summers : A quarter cup of brandy and let it simmer.

  [to Willow] 

  Buffy Summers : ... but even though it's hard, we have to end this. Yes, he's been wronged, and I personally would be ready to apologize, but I...

  Spike : Oh, someone put a stake in me.

  Xander Harris : You got a lot of volunteers in *here*.

  Spike : I just can't take all this namby-pamby boo-hooing about the bloody Indians.

  Willow Rosenberg : Uh, the preferred term is...

  Spike : You won. All right? You came in and you killed them, and you took their land. That's what conquering nations do. It's what Caesar did, and he's not goin' around saying, "I came, I conquered, I felt really bad about it." The history of the world is not people making friends. You had better weapons, and you massacred them. End of story.

  Buffy Summers : Well, I think the Spaniards actually did a lot of...

  [to Willow] 

  Buffy Summers : Not that I don't like Spaniards.

  Spike : Listen to you. How you gonna fight anyone with that attitude?

  Willow Rosenberg : We don't wanna fight anyone.

  Buffy Summers : I just wanna have Thanksgiving.

  Spike : [laughs]  Yeah... Good luck.

  Willow Rosenberg : Well, if we could talk to him...

  Spike : You exterminated his race. What could you possibly say that would make him feel better? It's kill or be killed here. Take your bloody pick.

  Xander Harris : Maybe it's the syphilis talking, but... some of that made sense.

• [Ghost Indian transforms into a large bear while fighting Buffy] 

  Spike : A bear! You made a bear!

  Buffy Summers : I didn't mean to.

  Spike : Undo it! Undo it!

• Buffy Summers : We don't say "Indian."

  Rupert Giles : Oh-oh, right! Yes, yes. Um, always behind on the terms. Still trying not to refer to you lot as "bloody colonials."

• Buffy Summers : With Mom at Aunt Darleene's this year, I'm not getting a Thanksgiving. Maybe it's just as well.

  Anya : Well, I think that's a shame. I love a ritual sacrifice.

  Buffy Summers : Not really a one of those.

  Anya : To commemorate a past event, you kill and eat an animal. It's a ritual sacrifice, with pie.

• [Spike asks Buffy to invite him into Giles house to get out of the sunlight] 

  Spike : Come on, I'm-I'm parboiling out here.

  [Giles hands Buffy a stake] 

  Buffy Summers : Want me to help make it quicker?

  Spike : [pitifully]  Invite me in.

  Buffy Summers : No.

  Rupert Giles : Fairly unlikely.

  [Spike tries running in and is knocked back] 

  Spike : Oh, damn it! Look, I'm safe. I can't bite anyone. Willow, tell 'em what I did.

  Willow Rosenberg : You-You said you were gonna kill me, then Buffy.

  Spike : Yes, bad, but let's skip that part and get to the part where I couldn't bite you.

  Willow Rosenberg : It's true... He had trouble performing.

• [watching Xander dig] 

  Anya : Soon he'll be sweating... I'm imagining having sex with him again.

  Buffy Summers : Imaginary Xander is quite the machine.

• Willow Rosenberg : But you have whipped cream. I saw it Giles' fridge.

  Buffy Summers : But that's whipped cream in a canister. Look, it's only right if you whip it yourself.

  Willow Rosenberg : Hey, and then later, we can churn our own butter and make sweaters out of sheep.

• Spike : Remember that conquering nation thing? Forget it. Apologize.

  Buffy Summers : Shut up, Spike.

  Spike : Fine, I'll do it myself.

  [to attacking Indians] 

  Spike : Hey, sorry! Sorry about that, Chief!

• [Buffy answers door to find Anya and a sick Xander] 

  Xander Harris : Happy Thanksgiving.

  Willow Rosenberg : Xander!

  Rupert Giles : You look like death.

  Willow Rosenberg : Are you okay?

  Buffy Summers : You didn't bring rolls?

• Willow Rosenberg : Buffy, earlier you agreed with me about Thanksgiving. It's a sham. It's all about death.

  Buffy Summers : It *is* a sham... but it's a sham with yams. It's a yam sham.

  Willow Rosenberg : You're not gonna jokey-rhyme your way out of this one.

• Buffy Summers : And the thing is, I like my evil like I like my men... Evil. You know, "straight up, black hat, tied to the train tracks, soon my electro-ray will destroy Metropolis" *bad*. Not all mixed up with guilt and the destruction of an indigenous culture.

• [thinking of possible murder scenarios] 

  Willow Rosenberg : Or... Or maybe an ear-harvesting demon that... It's, like, building another demon completely out of ears. Or... ooh. Thought. We're-We're just assuming someone else cut off the ear. What if it was self-inflicted, like van Gogh?

  Buffy Summers : So, she brutally stabbed herself, dumped the body, and then cut off her own ear?

  Willow Rosenberg : No. She cut off her ear, then killed herself, then dumped the body... I'm really off my game, aren't I?

• Buffy Summers : Sarcasm accomplishes nothing, Giles.

  Rupert Giles : It's sort of an end in itself.

• Xander Harris : I hate this guy.

  Buffy Summers : He's just doing what was done to him.

  Xander Harris : I didn't give him syphilis!

  Rupert Giles : No, but you freed his spirit, and after a century of unrest he saw you as one of his oppressors.

  Xander Harris : What, so he rises up and infects the first guy he sees? That's no fair.

  Buffy Summers : Like you've never woken up cranky.

• Buffy Summers : Wasn't exactly a perfect Thanksgiving.

  Xander Harris : I don't know. Seemed kinda right to me. A bunch of anticipation, a big fight, and now we're all sleepy.

• Buffy Summers : I still need to pick up a few things, so I'll check in. And keep your hands off the food.

  Rupert Giles : Oh, I'll try and restrain myself from eating uncooked potatoes and cranberries.

• Buffy Summers : Okay. You know what? We need to boil those and put them through the ricer.

  Rupert Giles : Well, uh, I don't think I have a ricer.

  Buffy Summers : You don't have a ricer? What do you mean? How could someone not have a ricer?

  Rupert Giles : Well, do you have one at home?

  Buffy Summers : I don't know. What's a ricer?

  Rupert Giles : We'll mash them with forks, much like the Pilgrims must have.

• Buffy Summers : First Thanksgiving on my own, and we all got through it.

  Xander Harris : And you know what? I think my syphilis is clearin' right up.

  Buffy Summers : And they say romance is dead. Or maybe they just wish it.

• Willow Rosenberg : The coroner's office said she was missing an ear. So I'm thinking, maybe we're looking for a witch. There's some *great* spells that work much better with an ear in the mix.

  Buffy Summers : That's one fun little hobby you've got there, Will.

• Willow Rosenberg : [about the old Sunnydale Mission that was found]  Doesn't it make you wonder what else is there, like, right under our feet?

  Buffy Summers : Mostly, I've just found sewers full of demons.

• Buffy Summers : Fine, okay? But someone still has to go warn the dean.

  Willow Rosenberg : I'll go. I need the air.

  Buffy Summers : Not alone.

  Anya : I'll go.

  Xander Harris : Me, too.

  Buffy Summers : You sure you're up to it?

  Spike : Oh, leave that one. He looks like he's ready to drop any minute, and I think I can eat someone if he's already dead.

  Xander Harris : I'm up to it.

• Spike : You know what happens to vampires who don't get to feed?

  Rupert Giles : I always wondered that.

  Buffy Summers : Giles, plates.

  Spike : Living skeletons, mate. Like famine pictures from those dusty countries... only not half as funny.

  Buffy Summers : You can have gravy. That has blood in it, right?

  Spike : Do you know what else has blood in it? Blood.

  Buffy Summers : Do I have to gag you?

• [Willow bought frozen peas instead of fresh ones] 

  Willow Rosenberg : They're gonna be mushy.

  Rupert Giles : They won't be mushy.

  Buffy Summers : I like mushy peas.

  Buffy Summers : You're the reason we had to have Pilgrims in the first place.

• Anya : [about Xander]  Look at him. Have you ever *seen* anything so masculine?

  Buffy Summers : Dean Guerrero or his wife?

  Willow Rosenberg : I think she means...

  [shows Xander in a sleeveless t-shirt as a construction worker] 

  Buffy Summers : Oh. Very manly. Not at all Village People.

• Hus : You can't stop me.

  Buffy Summers : You're very wrong about that.

  Hus : I am vengeance. I am my people's cry. They call for Hus. For the avenging spirit to *carve out* justice.

  Buffy Summers : They tell you to start an ear collection?

• Rupert Giles : Buffy, Xander is in real danger. Are you sure the solution is pie?

  Buffy Summers : Over bickering and confusion, I'll take pie.

  Rupert Giles : We will find a solution.

  Buffy Summers : And we will have a nice dinner, okay? Both. End of story. I'm going to have Thanksgiving, and it is going to be perfect.

• [first lines] 

  Jamie : [startled by Buffy]  Oh!

  Buffy Summers : Looking for me?

  Jamie : Holy... Wh-What do you want?

  [Buffy hits him] 

  Jamie : Uhh! Hey!

  [Jamie stands up as a vampire] 

  Buffy Summers : Look who's home.

  Jamie : [starts fighting]  Why don't you just go back where you came from? Things were great before you came.

  Buffy Summers : [as she stabs him]  And they say one person can't make a difference.

• Willow Rosenberg : Well, maybe there's a Wiccan spell that can cure it. You know, something regular medicine doesn't know. Ooh, there-there was a potion.

  [she looks through a book and pulls out a piece of paper and begins reading] 

  Willow Rosenberg : Sage, salt... onion?

  Buffy Summers : That's the stuffing

• Buffy Summers : Pretty darn scary. It was more like a riot than a Ralph's. I thought I was going to have to use Slayer moves on this one woman who was *completely* hoarding the pumpkin pie filling.

  Rupert Giles : And at some point you are going to tell me about the murder?

• Buffy Summers : Will, didn't you say the Chumash got all diseased when they were all holed up in the mission?

  Willow Rosenberg : Yeah. Uh, this has a better account of everything. It lists the various...

  Xander Harris : Various? As in...

  Willow Rosenberg : Well, the important thing is not to panic.

  Xander Harris : Wil, you just recited the mystical panic-causing incantation, so little hope there.

• Spike : What part of "Help me" do you not understand?

  Buffy Summers : The part where I help you.

• [Buffy is tying Spike to a chair] 

  Spike : Bloody Hell, woman. You're cuttin' off my circulation.

  Buffy Summers : You don't have any circulation.

  Spike : Well, it pinches.

• Anya : Uh, how much butter goes in with these?

  Buffy Summers : About half a stick and a quarter cup of brandy.

  [to Giles] 

  Buffy Summers : You do have brandy, don't you?

  Rupert Giles : [distracted]  What? Oh-Oh. Uh, uh, yes. Um, on the, uh, bookcase.

  Spike : I wouldn't say no to a brandy.

  Buffy Summers : [to Giles]  What's wrong?

  Rupert Giles : The victims. Apart from Xander, Hus has targeted authority figures. Father Gabriel, the curator of the cultural center. Who else fits this pattern?

  Spike : Just a small brandy.