Fawlty Towers (TV Series)

Basil the Rat (1979)

David Neville: Ronald

Quotes 

• Ronald : [looking up at Basil who towers a foot above him]  You know something? You're getting my dander up, you grotty little man!

• Ronald : Look, I was just trying to give an order to your waiter and he walked away while I was doing it.

  Basil Fawlty : Hm?

  Ronald : Well, he wasn't paying attention at all.

  Basil Fawlty : I'm so sorry. What were you saying?

  Ronald : The waiter wasn't listening when I was giving him our order. He seemed more interested in my fiancée's legs.

  Basil Fawlty : Really? May I?

  [Basil and Manuel look intently under the table in the area of his fiancée's legs] 

• Ronald : Don't shush me!

  Basil Fawlty : Well, I'm sorry, but th-th-th-the veal is, in fact, off. Well, it was never really on, quite honestly - that's a misprint.

  Ronald : A misprint?

  Basil Fawlty : Yes, it should say um... eel.

  Ronald : Eel Escalope?

• Basil Fawlty : They're there.

  Ronald : What do you mean, 'They're there'?

  Basil Fawlty : It's all there. There, there, there, and there. All there for your enjoyment.

• Polly : I do remember a place where I had some really good veal once. Umm, only I... I just can't think of the name of it... It was, umm... Ooh! La-di-da. Did you see Annie Hall? La-di-da.

  Ronald : Annie who?

• Sybil Fawlty : Here's your veal, Mr. Carnegie. Sorry for the delay.

  Ronald : He's just been given veal!

  Basil Fawlty : Uh, no, no. That's, uh, veal substitute.

  Ronald : Veal substitute?

  Basil Fawlty : Yes, it's not very good. It got rather held up on the boat. On the way over from, uh...

  Polly : Japan.

  Basil Fawlty : Norway. It's a... it's sort of a... Japo-Scandinavian imitation veal substitute, and I'm afraid that's the last slice, anyway.