The Golden Girls (TV Series)
Twice in a Lifetime (1990)
Bea Arthur: Dorothy Zbornak
Quotes
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Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : Ma, we need to talk. I waited up for you until two in the morning, and you still weren't home.
Sophia Petrillo : Oh, yea, Gertie and I and some of the girls went to Wolfie's to pick up guys.
Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : I called Wolfie's at 11, you weren't there.
Sophia Petrillo : Guess who got lucky?
Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : Oh God!
Sophia Petrillo : What can I say? A couple of egg creams, the bright fluorescent lights, and a retired jeweler named Shlomo all conspired to make a night of enchantment.
Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : Not for me. I can't tell you the horrible thoughts I had about what might have happened to you, although none as horrible as what you just described.
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Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : [happily] Ma.
Blanche : Sophia, you're here. And you have your suitcases. Does that mean you're not leaving?
Sophia Petrillo : I don't get it. I'm only gone for a few days and the dumb one's in there acting like a slut while the slut's in here being stupid! Of, course I'm back!
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Sophia Petrillo : Pussycat, I'm goin' out with my friends. Can you give me some money?
Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : What happened to the money I gave you last night?
Sophia Petrillo : Let's see. Ten bucks went for cover charge, ten bucks went for a round of drinks, and the other ten went into the G-string of a very cute male dancer named Mr Big.
Blanche : I know that guy. That's just a stage name.
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Sophia Petrillo : [trying to explain her new group of friends] Look. The Senior Citizens Center is divided into three cliques: the hip group, the not-so-hip group, and the broken-hip group. Which group would you want to be in?
Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : Oh, Ma, when I was a kid, you always told me it wasn't important to be a member of a popular clique. You always said, 'Just be yourself.'
Sophia Petrillo : Sure, that was because no-one liked you.
Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : [to Blanche] This is why, when I was a kid, I had an imaginary mother.
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Sophia Petrillo : [Sophia is fed up with Dorothy's criticism of her lifestyle] Well, I'm leaving. I found a compatible roommate. Here's my new address and 'phone number.
Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : Oh, come on, Ma, you're joking.
Sophia Petrillo : It's no joke. Ciao. Auf Wiedersehen. Arrivederci, and Sayonara.
[she leaves]
Rose : Gee, she could have at least said, 'Goodbye'.
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Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : Rose, quite frankly, I don't get it. What is this hold that Buzz has over you?
Blanche : Oh, I know exactly what she's going through, Dorothy. First love can be very powerful. I felt the same way about Heywood Boyle, the star pitcher on our High School baseball team. Ah, an amazing athlete. That boy had exceptional control.
[she pauses in reverie, while Dorothy rolls her eyes]
Blanche : He was always up for extra innings.
[another pause]
Blanche : And his delivery...
Dorothy Petrillo Zbornak : [erupting] All right, Blanche, enough!
Rose : Yeah, we get it. So, what was he like in bed?