- Willona Woods: I put my bills into three piles. You know, 30 days overdue, 60 days overdue, and, "Willona Woods? Honey, she don't live here no more."
- Michael Evans: Well, you know, there's gotta be something we can do, and the only thing we can do without is the telephone.
- Thelma Evans: Hey, hey. Maybe you can do without the telephone, but not me. None of my boyfriends can reach me.
- Michael Evans: Thelma, I seen them creatures you call your boyfriends, and you should be begging to have that phone yanked out of here!
- Florida Evans: Ain't this a shame?
- Willona Woods: What?
- Florida Evans: Here I am working steady, it's bill paying time, and I'm almost $50 short.
- Willona Woods: Whoo, child. I'd lend you everything I got, but that would make you $80 short.
- Willona Woods: Flo, I have just solved your problems financially. Come on over here, everybody. Take a look.
- Florida Evans: Oh, great.
- Thelma Evans: Oh, let's see this!
- Willona Woods: You are about to get a crash course in the Willona Woods School of Home Economics.
- Florida Evans: All right.
- Willona Woods: Now, these are your bills, right?
- Florida Evans: Right.
- Willona Woods: All you got to do is put a $5 payment on each bill. That's all.
- Florida Evans: [Points to a bill with no payment] Well, that's great, Willona, but there's nothing on this one, which means they just repossessed the refrigerator!
- Willona Woods: Oh, just hold on, honey. That's the beauty of the system.
- [Places a payment from one bill to the other]
- Willona Woods: Look at that. Now your refrigerator is back on and you can eat again.
- Florida Evans: On the floor? They just took the furniture.
- Willona Woods: I ain't never told nobody the system was perfect, did I?