Just Shoot Me! (TV Series)
An Axe to Grind (1999)
Enrico Colantoni: Elliot DiMauro
Quotes
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Elliot DiMauro : Poor Finch. He's delusional.
Nina Van Horn : Yes, and not the good kind of delusional, like when you convince yourself that one hand-rolled cigarette did not started that big wildfire.
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Jack Gallo : Larry King is an ass!
Nina Van Horn : And a lousy kisser.
Elliot DiMauro : What happened?
Jack Gallo : He bumped me off his show to talk with Alan Greenspan. Who wants to listen to Alan Greenspan? He's a bore!
Nina Van Horn : And a lousy kisser.
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Beth : Pay day! Pay day! Come beg for it!
Elliot DiMauro : She's like a walking advertisement for direct deposit.
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Elliot DiMauro : I don't mind, I have a million things to do.
Dennis Finch : Elliot, a sheep just pooped in your beret.
Elliot DiMauro : A million and one.
Dennis Finch : On the bright side, we found your class ring.
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Maya Gallo : The only way that makes sense is that Scott thinks you have feelings for me.
Elliot DiMauro : That's right.
Maya Gallo : Why would he think that?
Elliot DiMauro : Yesterday, he saw me over at the counter giving you a banana.
Maya Gallo : Yeah, so?
Elliot DiMauro : Maya, Scott's a strict Freudian. I gave you my *banana*.
Maya Gallo : Oh, I see. Scott's a Freudian lumberjack who saw you give me fruit.
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Maya Gallo : I can't believe you're out with Beth in a pathetic attempt to make Scott jealous. I mean, for God's sake, Beth?
Elliot DiMauro : She speaks very highly of you.
Maya Gallo : Maybe she had me confused with an appetizer.