Conan O'Brien: Self - Host

Quotes 

• Conan O'Brien : [after a "Walker, Texas Ranger" clip]  That guy broke into a 7-11, took a lot of people hostage, just so he could get a partner to sing "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" with him. You know I would like to do, Mike? You should see if we can do this, Jeff: We should see if we can get the quick cut of the guy laughing maniacally and firing into the air and loop that. Just for my own viewing pleasure at home. I'll put it to an ABBA song, and it'll be crazy.

• Conan O'Brien : [after the monologue]  The show is broken and it has not begun. Not a very good sign.

  [a man from the audience yells "Pull the lever!"] 

  Conan O'Brien : No no. Pfft. You know...

  [audience cheers] 

  Conan O'Brien : You know sir... sir, taken out of context, shouting "pull the lever!" could upset a lot of viewers at home. "Pull the lever!", people all over the country are like, "Oh my God!"