- Albert Quinn Ingalls: I'll raise you a cow you can be proud of.
- Charles Ingalls: First lesson, Albert. Male calves very rarely grow up to be cows.
- Albert Quinn Ingalls: Oh yeah. Then I won't expect it to give much milk.
- Laura Ingalls: Nobody cares about me! Nellie gets punished, everybody cares. Fagin gets sick, everybody cares.
- Caroline Ingalls: Laura, that's not true!
- Laura Ingalls: Yes it is. I know it's true. And Albert... I thought he liked me... But it wasn't me he wanted. It was Pa - MY Pa! He doesn't want to spend any time with me anymore. He's always with Albert and that stupid calf! And Albert... He calls him 'Pa.' But don't expect me to call him my brother, because he isn't!
- Nellie Oleson: Oh it's Pa now, is it?
- Laura Ingalls: Leave me alone.
- Nellie Oleson: Well, your father's always wanted a son. Guess he finally got one.
- Laura Ingalls: Shut up, Nellie!
- Nellie Oleson: What's a matter, Laura? Don't you like your new brother?
- [Giggles]
- Laura Ingalls: [PUNCH]