M*A*S*H (TV Series)

Welcome to Korea (1975)

Tom Dever: M.P. Lieutenant

Quotes 

• M.P. Lieutenant : Sir, this jeep is the property of Major General Cornell Dickering.

  Maj. Frank Marion 'Ferret Face' Burns : I don't know what you're talking about!

  M.P. Lieutenant : You'll have to come with me, sir.

  Maj. Frank Marion 'Ferret Face' Burns : What?

  Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce : I'd vouch for this man's character, Lieutenant, but he doesn't have any.

  Maj. Frank Marion 'Ferret Face' Burns : Snot! Snot! Snot!

  Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce : [lieutenant looks suspicious]  Have I ever lied to you?

• M.P. Lieutenant : Different.

  Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce : Huh?

  M.P. Lieutenant : The jeep is different!

  Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce : Yes, good eye. This different jeep is definitely different. We picked this one up in Seoul. It was stolen from our CO.

  M.P. Lieutenant : What's his name?

  Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce : Major Burns. Major Frank Burns. Or Ferret Face. He answers to both.