The Mary Tyler Moore Show (TV Series)

Mary's Delinquent (1975)

Gavin MacLeod: Murray Slaughter

Quotes 

• Murray Slaughter : So: how did things work out at the Big Sisters?

  Mary Richards : Terrific! They put you through a kind of screening process, and, uh, I guess I passed, 'cos I've got a little sister!

  Murray Slaughter : Ah - what's she like?

  Mary Richards : Well we were just sort of introduced, so, we didn't get a chance to talk, but, she's 15, bright, cute as a button, and out on probation for shoplifting.

  Sue Ann Nivens : What was the name of this group, Mary?

  Mary Richards : The Big Sisters.

  Sue Ann Nivens : The big sisters that would be the perfect thing for me to clinch the award and I'd be wonderful at it, because, I had an ideal relationship with my own sister. And it wasn't easy; naturally, she resented being the ugly one.

  Mary Richards : I had to mention the Big Sisters, didn't I? Now, because of me, some poor underprivileged kid is going to be forced to learn how to cook a quiche

• Ted Baxter : Hey Murray. Murray; where's my money?

  Murray Slaughter : Uh, in my top left-hand drawer, Ted.

  Ted Baxter : Is that camera left, or 'real' left?

  Murray Slaughter : Left, Ted.

  Ted Baxter : It's not here, Murray.

  Murray Slaughter : What do you mean it's not there?

  [growing concerned] 

  Murray Slaughter : It's got to be there - I just put it there, before lunch!

  [after Murray rummages though the drawer] 

  Murray Slaughter : It's not there!

  Ted Baxter : Somebody stole my money!

  Mary Richards : Oh, Ted, that's ridiculous. Oh, oh, I know what you're thinking, well, you're just wrong! Francine doesn't steal money from desks! She happens to be a shoplifter!