Robot Chicken (TV Series)
That Hurts Me (2005)
Seth Green: Freddy Krueger, Roland Emmerich, Dr. Niko Tatopoulos, Doug Goldstein, Various
Quotes
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Doug Goldstein : [after dying and being reincarnated as Doug-a-Lot Bear] Holy fucking ass crackers!
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Boy Scout 1 : I feel sad.
Boy Scout 2 : Yeah, but at least were not gay.
Huggytime Bear : [Enter Huggytime Bears] Maybe we can help!
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[In Hell]
Satan : [torturing people] HA ha ha ha ha ha ha! That will teach ya for voting for Nader! Ha ha ha!
[Hell freezes over]
Satan : Huh? What the hell?
Nerd : [singing] I got laid! I got laid! I got laid! Logging onto messenger, gonna tell the internet! LAID! LAID! LAID! LAID! LAID! L! A! Y! E! D! LAID! LAID! LAID! LAID! LAID! LAID! LAID! LAID!
Woman : What can I say? Nerds are hot! Mmmm... Hot.
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Franklin D. Roosevelt : The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself!
Audience member 1 : And spiders!
Franklin D. Roosevelt : ...Well yes. And spiders. That goes without saying...
Audience member 2 : And snakes!
Franklin D. Roosevelt : Yes... snakes too.
Audience member 3 : And don't forget werewolves!
Franklin D. Roosevelt : There is no such thing!
[Everyone starts to argue]
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Doug Goldstein : [in purgatory] Huh? Where am I?
Buddha : You're in purgatory, Doug. Spin the wheel of reincarnation!
Doug Goldstein : [spots Keira Knightley's underwear on the wheel] Oh boy! I hope I land on Keira Knightley's underwear!
Buddha : [sigh] Everyone wishes for that one.
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Doug Goldstein : [Awakes from the Huggytime Bear nightmare] NO!
Keira Knightley : Oh my gosh, I shot you!
Doug Goldstein : Keira Knightley?
Keira Knightley : Shh... Don't worry about a thing. The paramedics will be here soon.
Doug Goldstein : [chuckles] I was almost your underwear, you know.
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Freddy Krueger : If Ghostface got voted out, take it from Freddy, that would be a dream come true! HAHAHAHA! You get it? HAHAHAHA! A Dream? HAHAHAHA! I kill people in their nightmares, man. That's what I do, it's my thing!
