Roseanne (TV Series)

Don't Ask, Don't Tell (1994)

Roseanne Barr: Roseanne Conner

Photos 

Quotes 

• Roseanne : I haven't been dancing since... when was Dad's funeral?

• Nancy : [talking about her girlfriend Sharon]  Nothing personal, Roseanne, I just haven't introduced Sharon to any of my friends.

  Roseanne : Oh, you mean any of your straight friends, right? Because you've never been able to accept our alternate lifestyle. Well, it isn't a choice, you know.

• Sharon : I've been wanting to meet you for a while, but for some reason Nancy was scared to introduce her girlfriend to you guys.

  Roseanne : Why, you ain't one of them lesbians, are ya?

• Nancy : [about a bar she and girlfriend Sharon want to go to]  I don't think you'd have such a great time.

  Jackie : Sounds like fun.

  Nancy : It's a gay bar.

  Jackie : Okey-dokey.

  Roseanne : Well, Jackie, it doesn't bother us if it's gay.

  Nancy : Well, it might! Friday is convert-a-hetero night.

• Jackie : Well, I'm not going to feel comfortable there. What if everybody there thinks I'm gay?

  Roseanne : Well, then you could just think they're gay right back at them.

• Leon Carp : So, Friday night, I'll get my chance to see Rosanne out with my people, huh? That should prove quite entertaining.

  Roseanne : Why?

  Leon Carp : Well, how can I put this delicately? A gay bar is sort of like a size 12 dress. You just won't fit in.

• Roseanne : You'll just do something stupid that you're going to regret later.

  Dan Conner : I'm your husband. That's my right.