Roseanne makes a birthday speech for Dan: "You are the ink in my pen. You are the paper on which I write. We've been married for 17 years. We've had many wonderful times. We've had many many bad times. Happy birthday honey. You know like that one time when we went to see Old Yeller, and you cried and cried and remember you made me promice that I'd never tell anybody you cried like that? And I never have in all these years, and I never will."