Sanford and Son (TV Series)

The Shootout (1972)

Demond Wilson: Lamont Sanford

Photos 

Quotes 

• Fred G. Sanford : Who don't know about guns?

  Lamont Sanford : You don't.

  Fred G. Sanford : Are you kiddin'? World War I, Fred B. Sanford...

  Lamont Sanford : "B. Sanford"? What's the "B" for?

  Fred G. Sanford : Bullseye. Machine gunner, World War I. Rifleman. Pistol expert. Now how 'bout that?

  Lamont Sanford : Well, that's not the way I heard it. It was World War II and it was Fred B. Sanford alright, but the "B" wasn't for "Bullseye."

• Fred G. Sanford : How many times you see pictures of Jesus and he's white?

  Lamont Sanford : What about it?

  Fred G. Sanford : That's wrong, too, 'cause you can't hang around Jerusalem no thirty-some years and don't wear no hat and stay white.

• Lamont Sanford : [Handing Fred an antique rifle]  That's an original Revolutionary War rifle. I picked it up at an auction for fifty bucks.

  Fred G. Sanford : You paid fifty bucks for this?

  Lamont Sanford : Pop, this is an original Revolutionary War rifle. It's called a "Brown Bess."

  Fred G. Sanford : And they sold it to a brown dummy.

• Fred Sanford : You remember that command they used to give? "Don't fire 'till you see the whites."

  Lamont Sanford : It was, "Don't fire 'till you see the whites of their eyes".

  Fred Sanford : Bufford never waited that long.

• Lamont Sanford : [phoning their neighbor, afraid they've accidently shot him]  You know, pop, the phone company says to always let the phone ring at least 10 times, because sometimes people be taking a shower or something.

  Fred Sanford : Yeah... and sometimes, they be dead!