- Samantha: You men have no idea what we're dealing with down there. Teeth placement, and jaw stress, and suction, and gag reflex, and all the while bobbing up and down, moaning and trying to breathe through our noses. Easy? Honey, they don't call it a job for nothin'.
- Charlotte: What am I going to tell my kids? "Well, Mommy really wanted to get married so she asked Daddy and Daddy said "All righty.""
- Samantha: I'm sorry, but who else can I talk to about this?
- Carrie: Might I suggest no one?
- Samantha: You're my girlfriends. Help me! Have you ever had this problem?
- Miranda: Not really, but then I have to admit it's never exactly been a trip to Baskin Robbins.
- Samantha: Well, this guy is very sour, like... asparagus gone bad, or something.
- Carrie: [to waitress] Can I cancel my rice pudding? Thanks.
- Samantha: Beautiful guy. Great in bed. It's so disappointing. It's like getting a bad bottle of Beaujolais Nouveaux the first day of season.
- Miranda: It has a lot to do with nutrition. I once dated a smoker, and it affected how his tasted.
- Carrie: They should say that on the side of packs if they want to cut back sales.
- Samantha: Maybe there's something he could eat to make it sweeter!
- Carrie: Maybe you should write to Martha Stewart.
- Miranda: Dear Martha, funky spunk. Help!
- Carrie: Dear Funky Spunk, try a hint of mint!
- Samantha: It's not just asparagus, it's something else. I know. Clorox!
- Miranda: Well, at least it gets your whites whiter.
- Samantha: This is serious. I almost gagged.
- Carrie: Oh, well that is serious.
- Samantha: So what I do?
- Miranda: Just don't give him head again!
- Samantha: Hmm. I never even thought of that.
- Carrie: So what, casual head is back now?
- Samantha: It's fine, he's healthy, and I don't swallow.
- Carrie: Well, as long as you and the Center for Disease Control are fine with it...
- Miranda: You know, if the whole cum situation were reversed, do you think men would get anywhere near the stuff?
- Samantha: Well, maybe. If it tasted like beer!
- [they all laugh]
- Charlotte: I proposed to myself.
- Carrie: What?
- Charlotte: Yes. I suggested he have a tomato salad, then I suggested we get married.
- Carrie: Wait. What exactly did he say?
- Charlotte: All righty.
- Carrie: All righty? He said all righty? Now I'm thinking the upsetting thing isn't that you proposed, it's that you proposed to a guy that says "all righty".
- Charlotte: Oh, Carrie, stop.
- Carrie: All righty.