The Simpsons (TV Series)

How I Spent My Strummer Vacation (2002)

Tom Petty: Tom Petty

Quotes 

• Tom Petty : Lyrics are the hardest part of songwriting. But when you come up with something meaningful and heartfelt...

  Homer : Boring!

  Tom Petty : Will you stop saying that?

  Homer : But rock stars are supposed to be about drinking and getting drunk and boozing it up.

  Apu Nahasapeemapetilon : And girls that have legs and know how to use them.

  Otto : A-And why I can't drive 55.

  Tom Petty : You just want mindless generic rock?

  Homer : Precisely.

• Keith Richards : [as Homer improvises a rock song]  What's all this, then?

  Tom Petty : He's stealing the show from us.

  Mick Jagger : Not on my shift.

  [it's revealed he's on top of the Satan head prop] 

  Mick Jagger : Let's rock and roll.

• Mick Jagger : There's no excuse for our horrible behavior tonight, Homer.

  Elvis Costello : We acted like a bunch of angry young men.

  Lenny Kravitz : Yeah, rock 'n' roll is supposed to be about peace and love.

  Brian Setzer : I hope you won't judge the entire Brian Setzer Orchestra by my actions.

  Tom Petty : [with his foot bandaged]  What we're trying to say, Homer, is we're sorry. By the way, I don't suppose any of you have seen my, um...

  Lisa : No. Sorry.

• Homer : Evening, fellow rockers.

  Elvis Costello : There you are. We thought we were gonna have to go on without you.

  Homer : I'm ready. Just give me a guitar. How many solos should I do? Four?

  [blank stares] 

  Homer : I'll do four.

  Tom Petty : Uh, Homer, you didn't think you were gonna be playing with...

  Homer : [gasping]  My official tour jacket! Lookit...

  [seeing "honorary roadie" on the back] 

  Homer : Wait. You misspelled "guitar hero".

  Mick Jagger : Look, sorry if there's been a misunderstanding, Homer. We really just need you to tap the mics and say "Test. Test."

  Homer : Can't you do it?

  [as Keith opens his mouth in shock, his cigarette falls out, and Mick folds his arms over his chest] 

  Homer : [sadly]  Oh. Okay. So I'll, uh... okay.

• Marge : That was great, Homie.

  Homer : What the hell are you doing here?

  Mick Jagger : Camp is over, Homer.

  Homer : It's been a week already?

  Marge : I'm glad you had fun, but it's time to come home.

  Tom Petty : Your mother's right, Homer.

  [Marge scowls] 

  Tom Petty : Gotta get back to the real world.

  Mick Jagger : Yeah, we've all gotta get home. My lawn's not gonna mow itself.

  Keith Richards : And I've gotta put up the storm windows. Winter's coming.

  Homer : Wait. Don't go. I wanna keep on rocking.

  [to his fellow campers] 

  Homer : Come on, guys. A-one, a-two...

  Elvis Costello : [pulling up on his motorcycle]  I'll take that.

  Homer : [Elvis takes his guitar and leaves]  No!

  Elvis Costello : [coming back]  It came with a pick.