That '70s Show (TV Series)
Over the Hills and Far Away (2002)
Kurtwood Smith: Red Forman
Photos
Quotes
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Kitty Forman : [Everybody is packed inside the car] Do you have to breathe so much? It's like a sauna in here!
Eric Forman : Alright, you heard the lady! No more breathing!
Kitty Forman : I didn't tell you not to breathe, I asked you not to breathe as much. There's a difference.
Fez : [to Red] For crazy people...
Reginald "Red" Forman : Hey, Ali Baba! Close sesame!
Steven Hyde : Red, you missed the exit.
Reginald "Red" Forman : Oh, damn! Eric, you're supposed to be watching the map! What are you doing?
Eric Forman : [Eric holds up the map, which he has folded into a crown] Making you a crown, because you're King of the Road!
Fez : I need to go to the bathroom.
Steven Hyde : Can you turn up the radio?
Michael Kelso : [Playing his video game] First down... Touchdown!
Kitty Forman : WILL YOU ALL JUST SHUT UP!
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Eric Forman : [as everyone is getting into the car] Mom seems to have cheered up.
Reginald "Red" Forman : Don't be fooled. At any minute it can strike.
Michael Kelso : Wait up!
Reginald "Red" Forman : What do you want?
Michael Kelso : The explanation is pinned to my lapel.
Reginald "Red" Forman : [Opens the envelope and reads the note, out loud] "Dear Mr. Forman: Mr. Kelso and I are unable to take Michael to UW. Here's thirty bucks so he can go with you.". Where's the thirty bucks?
Michael Kelso : I used it to pay for this electronic football game.
Reginald "Red" Forman : I swear to God, Kelso, you make Eric look like Einstein!
Eric Forman : Thank you, Daddy.
Michael Kelso : [to Eric] Thank you? Einstein was ugly!
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Reginald "Red" Forman : Before we hit the road, we need to talk about the horrible thing that has taken over your mother.
Eric Forman : Oh, you mean her "change of life"?
Steven Hyde : I thought we were calling it "the lady parts problem".
Reginald "Red" Forman : It goes by many names, it's a tricky enemy. I haven't been this frosty since Korea, and like a Commie, it can jump out at any moment and attack.
Kitty Forman : [off-screen] Red, honey?
Steven Hyde : Take cover!
Eric Forman : Retreat!
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Steven Hyde : Mrs. Forman, college isn't for me. I do my learning on the streets.
Reginald "Red" Forman : Steven, you're a smart kid. If you apply yourself, you can go to college, too.
Steven Hyde : You don't trust me alone around the house?
Reginald "Red" Forman : See how smart you are?
Kitty Forman : My baby boy is all grown up and off visiting college. I am *so* frickin old!
Eric Forman : And menopause makes another unwelcome appearance at the dinner table.
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Eric Forman : There's my favorite co-ed! You all ready to go?
Donna Pinciotti : I can't go. My Dad's making me go to Marquette. He says it's a better school. Oh, and because it sounds French.
Eric Forman : Well, if it's a better school, I should go, too. Right, Dad?
Reginald "Red" Forman : No. State schools are cheap. That's where you belong.
Eric Forman : Can't you take out a second mortgage on the house?
Reginald "Red" Forman : [Red and Hyde laugh] Not for you, dumbass!
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Reginald "Red" Forman : [Fez has just helped load the luggage into the back of the Vista Cruiser] Thanks for the help. You seem to have a natural talent for handling luggage.
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Reginald "Red" Forman : [reading the campus map] There's got to be at least one all-male dormitory on this campus. Here we go. Between the chapel and School of Interior Design.
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Donna Pinciotti : Donna
[on the phone]
Donna Pinciotti : Eric?
Eric Forman : You hate Marquette, so I think it's safe to cross it right off the list.
Donna Pinciotti : Actually I love it! There's this English professor, he wears a beret and a corduroy jacket, but he listens to Zeppelin!
Eric Forman : Well, UW has a vending machine.
[pauses]
Eric Forman : Donna, I love you.
Donna Pinciotti : I love you. 'Bye.
Reginald "Red" Forman : [to Eric] You gonna cry, too?
[Kitty's at the foot of the bed, watching TV and crying]
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Eric Forman : [Red and Eric talk while Kitty sits at the foot of the bed, crying]
[about Donna and Marquette]
Eric Forman : She loves it there.
Reginald "Red" Forman : We're *all* screwed! You think I want to be here, nursing my lunatic wife from the brink? And even if by some glimmer of hope you hang on to Donna, eventually she's going to turn into *that*, and then a few years later you die.
Eric Forman : [sarcastically] Thanks for the bedtime story.
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Kitty Forman : What a wonderful weekend! We should go away more often.
Reginald "Red" Forman : [to Hyde and Fez] They gotta make a pill for this.
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Reginald "Red" Forman : [about UW] What is this place? Barefoot hippies playing Frisbee, barefoot hippies singing to trees...
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Reginald "Red" Forman : What do you want?
Michael Kelso : Once again, the explanation is pinned to my lapel.
Reginald "Red" Forman : [opens the envelope, reads the note out loud] "Dear Mr. and Mrs. Forman: Please give Michael thirty dollars for the game you threw out the window and broke. Signed, my parents".
[Kitty laughs]
Reginald "Red" Forman : Well, you made her laugh. That's worth thirty bucks.