Zack Ward: Dave Scouvel

Quotes 

• Dave Titus : I was supposed to kill myself an hour ago.

  Christopher Titus : Well, I just got your suicide note. Maybe next time you shouldn't *mail* it!

• Christopher Titus : I remember how Dave used to beg me. He'd get down on his knees

  [Dave gets down on one knees] 

  Christopher Titus : Both Knees!

  [Dave puts his other leg down] 

  Christopher Titus : And then he'd sing that "Titus is great" song!

  [turns to Dave] 

  Dave Titus : [singing]  Titus is great! He's really, really great! I can't believe how great he can be!

  [Calvin is seen swaying to the song in the back] 

• Sgt. Gordon : Glad you're aboard, son. You got ten minutes to say your goodbyes.

  Dave Titus : Sir, yes, sir! Sir, thank you, sir, sir!

  Ken Titus : Dave.

  Dave Titus : Dad, sir!

  Ken Titus : Son. I don't like goodbyes, so...

  [he leaves without another word]