Johnny Carson: Self - Host

Quotes 

• Johnny Carson : [displaying an Arizona ad for a Christmas vasectomy discount]  Now, there's a perfect gift for the man who will - who will have nothing.

• Johnny Carson : [reading a letter from a viewer]  If a comedian tells a joke in the forest, and nobody laughs, is it still funny?

  Ed McMahon : ...That could apply also to a monologue.

  Johnny Carson : Or an announcer.

• Johnny Carson : The idea of this bit is...

  Ed McMahon : Do have a lot of faith in this bit?

  Johnny Carson : You must think positively.

  Ed McMahon : I mean, this is gonna be something hilarious, you're trying to tell us.

  Johnny Carson : No, we don't say that. We say this possibly could be - could be amusing.

  Ed McMahon : Could be funny... Amusing - alright.

  Johnny Carson : Could be amusing, and could be one of those... "that's interesting" type of things.