Tyron Leitso: Eric Gotts

Quotes 

• Peter Johnson : Sorry I tried to steal your woman.

  Eric Gotts : Jaye's not my woman.

  Peter Johnson : She's not?

  Eric Gotts : Uh-uh.

  Peter Johnson : Oh. Think I still have a shot?

  Eric Gotts : Actually, by the time you're old enough to date, she might be ready to stop running, so maybe you do.

  Peter Johnson : What's she running from?

  Eric Gotts : I don't know. It'll take a smarter man than me to answer that.

  Peter Johnson : I'm smarter than you, and I can't solve the riddle that is Jaye.

  Eric Gotts : She is a riddle.

  Peter Johnson : She's the most mysterious girl I've ever known.

  Eric Gotts : She's an enigma.

  Peter Johnson : She's a conundrum.

  Eric Gotts : She's a 10-million-piece sky puzzle.

  Peter Johnson : She's a lifetime of New York Times Sunday crosswords.

  Eric Gotts : She's a Rubik's cube.

  Peter Johnson : [seeing her pull up]  She's here.

  Eric Gotts : In my car.

• Peter Johnson : I can't stop thinking about her.

  Eric Gotts : There's nothing wrong with that. It's normal.

  Peter Johnson : Really?

  Eric Gotts : Yeah.

  Peter Johnson : Why does it have to hurt so bad?

  Eric Gotts : Because you love her, but you know it's impossible to be with her.

  Peter Johnson : Think I'll ever forget her?

  Eric Gotts : She's your mother. She'll always be a part of you.

• Eric Gotts : Do you want me to kick your ass? 'Cause I can. I can do that if you'd like.

  Peter Johnson : Um, I'd rather this not spiral into a whole physical thing, so I'll respectfully decline your offer to kick my ass.

  [Eric takes his baseball bat away] 

  Peter Johnson : How long did you know?

  Eric Gotts : The whole time.

  Peter Johnson : Damn.

  Eric Gotts : Even if you got rid of me, you'd still be left with the biggest obstacle to Jaye's heart.

  Peter Johnson : What's that?

  Eric Gotts : Jaye.

• Jaye : [kissing Eric]  So, you know when you have, like, that first date and there's all that tension because you've never kissed before? Well, now we can just go out and it can be tension-free.

  Eric Gotts : I, uh... I still have tension.

  Peter Johnson : [approaching as they kiss again]  So, I guess you worked out your differences.

  Jaye : We didn't have any differences.

  Peter Johnson : Congratulations to the victor. I'm gracious enough to admit that the better man has won the girl. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine.

  [in the background, Eric's car bursts into flames] 

  Peter Johnson : You know, eventually. I may still have issues.

• Eric Gotts : So, you came to rescue me.

  Jaye : I guess I kinda did.

  Eric Gotts : Thanks, but he is only a kid.

  Jaye : Yeah. Well, I guess I was trying to rescue you from me. I'm the one who let him get away.

  Eric Gotts : I don't think I need to be rescued from you. In fact, I think that...

  Jaye : You know what, maybe this isn't really a conversation we should be having right now.

  Eric Gotts : Oh, this isn't gonna be a conversation. It's actually gonna be a speech by me. I had some time to think during my abduction, and here's the thing. I don't know what your issues are or what happened to you to make you the way you are, but you're clearly not ready for a relationship. Frankly, I think with you, any sort of human interaction is pretty iffy. And that's not a criticism, because God knows you saw what happened to me back in that chapel. I'm damaged, and it's gonna take me time to heal; probably longer than I can guess. Which is why I think... we should absolutely have a date.

  Jaye : What?

  Eric Gotts : You know, a date.

  Jaye : I know what a date is. You're not talking about the fruit, are you?

  Eric Gotts : I just feel like there's something here; a spark or chemistry or something. We should explore that.

  Jaye : But the issues and the damage, you weren't wrong about any of that. In fact, you don't even know the half of it. Forget about your damage. I'm quite possibly certifiable. Why would you wanna get involved with anything potentially as messy and complicated as, well... me?

  Eric Gotts : Because you make me happy.

• Jaye : I have a problem. Peter showed up at my house last night with a big black eye, and he says you did it.

  Eric Gotts : That's ridiculous.

  Jaye : Yeah, I know. I have a problem. Peter showed up at my house last night with a big black eye, and he says you did it.

  [he chuckles] 

  Jaye : What are you laughing at? It's not funny. Clearly, he did it to himself. The kid is disturbed. He thinks you're my boyfriend.

  Eric Gotts : Hey, you're the one that gave him a taste for it.

  Jaye : For what?

  Eric Gotts : Violence. I'm sure he fell in love with you the second you threw him up against that wall.

  Jaye : Uh, no. If I wanted him to fall in love with me, I would have given him a taste for fish Jell-O.

  Eric Gotts : What's that supposed to mean?

  Jaye : It's impossible you could have liked any of your three portions. It's fish Jell-O. You do realize that's Jell-O and fish?

  Eric Gotts : I don't know why you're so bent out of shape. You made it perfectly clear that you weren't interested in me.

  Jaye : When did I make anything perfectly clear?

• Jaye : You're not my boyfriend! It's just a statement of fact. Doesn't mean I'm not interested.

  Eric Gotts : Are you?

  Jaye : If I were in a position to be interested in somebody, I think it could be safe to say it'd be someone very much... not unlike... you.

  Eric Gotts : Did you just come down here to deliver your mixed message in person?

  Jaye : I came here because I have a Peter problem. He invited me to the opera. Come on, you gotta help me out. I can't have a stalker whose voice hasn't changed yet.

  Eric Gotts : I don't know what you expect me to do about it.

  Jaye : Talk to him. Or smack him around for real. Whatever.

• Eric Gotts : I was just coming to see you.

  Jaye : You were?

  Eric Gotts : Yeah. I brought you donuts.

  Jaye : [seeing Katya eating them]  Those donuts?

  Katya : [with her mouth full]  Mm-hmm.

  Eric Gotts : She was starving.

  Jaye : But you were bringing me... and then she's here... and now they're all... and she is?

  Eric Gotts : Her name's Katya. From Russia. I was passing by and a little voice told me I should probably stop and check on her.

  Jaye : Voice? There was a voice?

  Eric Gotts : [meaning one's conscience]  Yeah. You know, that little voice inside?

  Jaye : Oh, right. The little voice inside.

• Eric Gotts : [installing a satellite dish for Jaye]  So, when do I get to come over and watch TV?

  Jaye : Oh. I don't know. I just have the one TV, and it's very small.

  Eric Gotts : Well, that's okay. We can sit close.

• Mahandra McGinty : [watching Eric install a satellite dish on Jaye's trailer]  How'd you get him to do that?

  Jaye : I asked.

  Mahandra McGinty : Very clever.

  Jaye : He was surprisingly eager.

  Mahandra McGinty : Eager's a good thing.

  Jaye : Uh-huh.

  Mahandra McGinty : You're staring.

  Jaye : Uh-huh. No, I'm not. I'm... supervising.

  Mahandra McGinty : [laughing]  I see what you're supervisin'.

  [checking out his butt] 

  Mahandra McGinty : It's like an apple. You bounce a quarter off that apple.

  Jaye : Apples are good for you.

  [in the heat, he takes his shirt off and uses it to wipe down sweat, then catches them staring] 

  Jaye , Mahandra McGinty : Hi.

  Eric Gotts : Sure is hot.

  Mahandra McGinty : [under her breath]  Sure is.

  Jaye : You want something to drink? I have bottled water.

  Eric Gotts : Bottled would be great.

  Mahandra McGinty : I'll get it. You stay and continue the mating ritual.

• Jaye : [Katya wails in despair after learning her groom-to-be is a 13-year-old]  Can't you get her to stop?

  Eric Gotts : She just found out the man she loves doesn't exist. Her heart's broken. This is what happens. People cry. I cried for three days.

  Jaye : Okay, you were right. I guess I've never been in love. Because the only time I made a noise like that, I'd had some bad fish.

  Eric Gotts : Well, love doesn't always sound like that. You have to be willing to risk the heartache if you want the good stuff. Right?

  Jaye : Uh, I'm pretty sure there's lots of good stuff you can get without all of that.

  Eric Gotts : Well, sure, but if you want to be close to somebody - really close - you have to open yourself up.

  Jaye : Like a wound?

  Eric Gotts : You have to drop the defenses.

  Jaye : I don't have defenses.

  Eric Gotts : No, you have offenses. Don't you ever wish you had someone you could just be yourself with?

  Jaye : I'm not sure who that is yet.

  Eric Gotts : Well, wouldn't it be interesting to find out?

• Eric Gotts : [after receiving a black eye while talking to Peter's dad]  I probably shouldn't have said that thing about his wife.

  Jaye : Well, whatever you said didn't give him any right to hit you.

  Eric Gotts : I kind of implied that Peter was taking his cue from the way his father treats his mother.

  Jaye : That doesn't sound so bad.

  Eric Gotts : Apparently, she's dead. She died a year ago.

  Jaye : Oh.

  Eric Gotts : And he didn't actually hit me, but it was his fault that I walked into the forklift.

• Jaye : She slept at the fountain?

  Katya : Fountain of love. I meet my Peter. I marry. But he no come.

  Jaye : Peter got a phone number?

  Katya : No. No phone. But he make me letter.

  Eric Gotts : [taking them]  These are all e-mail printouts. No last name. No physical address.

  Jaye : You think she's one of those Russian mail-order brides? You know, sex slave?

  Katya : No sex slave! I coming for love... and some sex. But no slave.

• Eric Gotts : I need to speak to you about your kid.

  Dick Johnson : What about my kid?

  Eric Gotts : [cut to Jaye's trailer park, where he shows up with a black eye]  Look what your boyfriend's father did to me.