The X-Files (TV Series)

Bad Blood (1998)

David Duchovny: Fox Mulder

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Quotes 

• Scully : First of all, if the family of Ronnie Strickland does indeed decide to sue the FBI for, I think the figure is $446 million, then you and I both will most certainly be co-defendants. And second of all... I don't even have a second of all, Mulder! $446 million! I'm in this as deep as you are, and I'm not even the one that overreacted! I didn't do the...

  [makes jabbing motion with fist] 

  Scully : with the thing!

  Mulder : I did not overreact, Ronnie Strickland was a vampire!

  Scully : Where's your proof?

  Mulder : You're my proof! You were there! Okay, now you're scaring me. I want to hear exactly what you're going to tell Skinner.

  Scully : Oh, you want our stories straight.

  Mulder : No, no, no, I didn't say that! I just want to hear it the way you saw it.

  Scully : I don't feel comfortable with that.

  Mulder : Prison, Scully! Your cellmate's nickname is going to be Large Marge. She's gonna read a lot of Gertrude Stein.

• Scully : [bewildered]  But... he was dead!

  Mulder : [bemused]  I noticed that.

  Scully : He had a stake through his heart!

  Mulder : I noticed that, too.

• Scully : [waiting to speak to Skinner about Mulder's "staking" a suspect]  Mulder, please just keep reminding him you were drugged.

  Mulder : [impatiently]  Would you stop that.

  Scully : It couldn't hurt.

  Mulder : [impatiently]  Stop it.

  Walter Skinner : [enters room]  Scully... Mulder...

  Mulder : [interrupting]  I was drugged!

• Mulder : [Investigating a body, in a triumphant voice]  Have you noticed that this man's shoes are untied?

  Scully : Mulder, what's your point?

  Mulder : This means something.

• Scully : Why would a real vampire need fake fangs? I mean, for the sake of argument.

  Mulder : Fangs are very rarely mentioned in the folklore. Real vampires aren't actually thought to have them. It's more an invention of Bram Stoker's. I think maybe you were right before when you said that this is just a guy who's watched too many Dracula movies. He just happens to be a real vampire.

• Mulder : Look at that. Huh? Huh?

  [Scully pulls out fake vampire teeth] 

  Mulder : Oh shi...

• Scully : But I just put money in the "magic fingers"!

  Mulder : [hops on bed]  I won't let it go to waste!

• Walter Skinner : Ronnie Strickland's body's disappeared from the morgue. Apparently in conjunction with this, the coroner's been attacked. His throat was bitten.

  Mulder : The coroner's dead?

  Walter Skinner : [uncomfortably]  No, his... throat was bitten. It was sort of... gnawed... on.

• Mulder : Historically, cemeteries were thought to be a haven for vampires, as are castles, catacombs and swamps, but unfortunately, you don't have any of those.

  Sheriff Hartwell : We used to have swamps, only the EPA made us take to calling 'em "wetlands".

• Scully : Mulder, are you okay?

  Mulder : [Mulder has been drugged]  Who's the black private dick who's a sex machine with all the chicks? Shaft. Can you dig it? They say this cat Shaft is a bad mother, shut your mouth. Talkin' 'bout Shaft.

• Mulder : So we're out here looking for any signs of vampire activity.

  Sheriff Hartwell : Which would be like, a...

  Mulder : Broken or shifted tombstones, the absence of birds singing.

  Sheriff Hartwell : There you go, 'cause I ain't - I aint hearin' any birds singin'. Right? 'Course it's winter and we ain't got no birds.