- Neil: Vyvyan, will you shut up? You're giving me tunnel vision!
- Rick: STOP SHOUTING, NEIL!
- Neil: Stop shouting, yourself!
- Rick: I AM NOT SHOUTING!
- Neil: Yes you are!
- Rick: I BLOODY WELL AM NOT! If you want to hear shouting, Matey, this is it.
- [screams like a baby]
- Vyvyan: [lighting a Molotov cocktail] It's funny, but being ill makes me lose my usual tolerant, and easy going approach to communal living.
- [tosses the cocktail between Rick and Neil's rooms]
- Manure Salesman(Mick): We've come about the muck.
- Rick: Muck?
- Manure Salesman(Mick): You know manure.
- Rick: Yes.
- Manure Salesman(Mick): We've been told to drop a load in your garden.
- Rick: Now listen. Listen. Absolutely nobody, I don't care who they are, is doing a two ton poo outside my front door.
- Manure Salesman(Tezz): Suit yourself. Just though you might need it to cover up that dead hippie you just murdered.
- Neil: Do you think that you could get something while you're there to clean the toilet with?
- Rick, Vyvyan: What?
- Mike: I don't think I can, Neil.
- Vyvyan: You can't clean the toilet, Neil. It'll lose all its character.
- Rick: We NEVER clean the toilet, Neil. That's what being a student is all about. No way, Harpic. No way, Dot. All that Blue Loo scene is for squares. One thing's for sure, Neil. When Cliff Richard wrote "Wired for Sound", no way was he sitting on a clean lavatory. He was living on the limit, just like me. Where the only place to put bleach is in your hair.
- Vyvyan: Living on Limits? What, are you on a diet?
- Rick: No, I live on The Limit, Vyvyan. The Limit. Because I'm a Rider at the Gates of Dawn and I take no prisoners.
- Vyvyan: [all the guys in the house are sick - Vyvyan picks up a small mirror and stares into it] Feel better you bastard!
- Mrs Vyvyan: I heard you were ill so I brought you a present.
- Vyvyan: The last present you got me was a box of matches.
- Mrs Vyvyan: That was a joke.
- Vyvyan: I was only 8-weeks-old.
- Neil: [another Neil has appeared] Hello?
- Neil 2: Hello?
- Neil: Wow. Anybody watching must've thought this was a negative reality inversion.
- Kissing Woman: [couple kissing in bushes nearby suddenly break off and look over] Cor, that looked just like a negative reality inversion, didn't it?
- Kissing Man: Yes, it did a bit.
- Manure Salesman(Mick): Hello.
- Manure Salesman(Tezz): Hello.
- Rick: Hello!
- Manure Salesman(Mick): I'm Mick. This is Tezz.
- Manure Salesman(Tezz): Alright.
- Manure Salesman(Mick): We would've brought Harry, but... we don't know anyone called Harry.