The Simpsons (TV Series)

Treehouse of Horror III (1992)

Dan Castellaneta: Homer Simpson, Grampa, Krusty the Klown Doll, Man Disposing of Nude Photos, Hold Music, Sailor #2, Charlie, King Homer, Barney Gumble, Pilot #1, Monkey, Wedding Photographer, Spirit #4, Zombie Groans, Groundskeeper Willie, Zombie #2, Krusty the Klown, Sideshow Mel, Zombie #3, Zombie #4, Zombie #5, KZNB Announcer, Kodos, Shakespeare, Returning Zombie #1, Mayor Quimby

Photos 

Quotes 

• Shopkeeper : [Homer has agreed to purchase a Krusty doll for Bart's birthday]  Take this object, but beware it carries a terrible curse!

  Homer : Ooh, that's bad.

  Shopkeeper : But it comes with a free frogurt!

  Homer : That's good.

  Shopkeeper : The frogurt is also cursed.

  Homer : That's bad.

  Shopkeeper : But you get your choice of toppings.

  Homer : That's good!

  Shopkeeper : The toppings contain potassium benzoate.

  [Homer looks puzzled] 

  Shopkeeper : ...That's bad.

  Homer : Can I go now?

• [Flanders, a zombie, approaches Homer] 

  Ned Flanders : Hey, Simpson. I'm feeling a mite peckish. Mind if I chew your ear?

  [Homer kills Flanders by blasting him apart with a shotgun as Marge gasps in shock] 

  Bart : Dad! You killed the zombie Flanders.

  Homer : He was a zombie?

• Lisa : Dad, we did something very bad!

  Homer : Did you wreck the car?

  Bart : No.

  Homer : Did you raise the dead?

  Lisa : Yes.

  Homer : But the car's okay?

  Lisa , Bart : Uh-huh.

  Homer : All right then.

• [Homer has given Bart a "cursed" Krusty doll] 

  Grampa : That doll is evil, I tells ya! Evil! EEEE-VIL!

  Marge : Grampa, you said that about all the presents.

  Grampa : I just want attention.

• Marge : Homer! Did you barricade the door?

  Homer : Why? Oh, the zombies! No.

  [zombies enter] 

• Homer Simpson : That doll tried to kill me!

  Bart Simpson : I'd say the pressure has finally gotten to Dad, but what pressure?

• Carl : Hey, I hear we're going to Ape Island.

  Lenny : Yeah, to capture a giant ape. I wish we were going to Candy Apple Island.

  Charlie : Candy Apple Island? What do they got there?

  Carl : Apes, but they're not so big.

• Marge : Well, I'm sure glad we didn't turn into mindless zombies.

  Bart : Shhh... TV.

  Homer : [thud sound on TV]  Man fall down... funny.

• Homer Simpson : The doll's trying to kill me and the toaster's been laughin' at me!

• Homer : [singing]  My baloney has a first name, it's H-O-M-E-R, my baloney has a second name, it's H-O-M-E-R.

• Barney : Wow! Look at the size of that platform!

• Homer : [a la Alfred Hitchcock]  Good eeevening.

  [normal voice] 

  Homer : I've been asked to tell you that the following show is very scary. You see, there are some crybabies out there - religious types, mostly - who might be offended. If you are one of them, I advise you to turn off your TV now. Come on, I dare you!

  [imitates chicken] 

  Homer : Buck-buck-buck-buck! Chicken!

  [screen winks out] 

• [while fighting zombies] 

  Barney : Wow, George Washington!

  Homer : Take that, Washington!

  [BLAM!] 

  Homer : Eat lead, Einstein!

  [BLAM!] 

  Homer : Show's over, Shakespeare!

  [clubs him to the ground] 

  Zombie Shakespeare : Is this the end of Zombie Shakespeare?

• Marge : Homer, did you call the audience "chicken"?

  Homer : No. I swear on this Bible.

  Marge : That's not a Bible. That's a book of carpet samples.

  Homer : Ooh... fuzzy.

• Homer : [cocks a shotgun]  To the book depository!

• [a headless zombie enters the Simpson home, groaning. All the party-goers scream... then Ned Flanders's head pops out of the zombie's neck] 

  Ned Flanders : Hi, fellow Halloweenies! Did I scarededly-dare you?

  Grampa : [gasping, clutching his heart]  Ah... gol-durn it!

  Bart : Nice try, Mr. Flanders, but I've got a story so scary, you'll wet your pants.

  Grampa : Too late.

• Marge : [to King Homer who is trying to climb the Empire State Building]  You know, you look a little flushed. Maybe you should eat more vegetables and less people.

  King Homer : Uh-huh.

• Grampa : [after Homer botches his story]  Homer! I've coughed up scarier stuff than that!

  Bart : Grampa, why don't you tell us a story? You've led an interesting life.

  Grampa : THAT'S A LIE, AND YOU KNOW IT!

  [scene fades to black and white] 

  Grampa : But I have seen a lot of movies...

  ["King Homer" title card] 

• Homer : Do you sell toys?

  Shopkeeper : We sell forbidden objects from places men fear to tread... we also sell frozen yogurt, which I call "frogurt"!

• Marge : Anybody know a ghost story?

  Lisa : I do! It's a story of a boy and his doll.

  Homer : That's not so scary.

  Lisa : A doll, from Hell.

  Homer : I'm gonna go to the store.

  [Lisa laughs evilly] 

• Bart Simpson : Hey Homer, where's your present?

  Homer Simpson : D'ohh! I mean... D'ohhn't worry son, I forgot to get you a present. But I swear on my father's grave...

  Grampa : Hey!

• Homer : [comes down the stairs in a toga]  Behold mighty Caesar!

  [his toga catches on a nail ripping it off and leaving him in his underwear] 

  Homer : in all his glory!

  [the kids laugh at him] 

  Homer : Do'h!