- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Casey, we need to talk. Why did you take my medal?
- [refering to his father's Purple Heart Casey lost]
- Casey Cooper McGillis: I don't know.
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Well, what were you thinking?
- Casey Cooper McGillis: I don't know.
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Didn't you know it was wrong?
- Casey Cooper McGillis: I don't know.
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Casey, sit down.
- [he lowers down on his haunches]
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: All right, look - suppose I took something of yours you really cared about. Suppose I took Wubby.
- [pointing to her stuffed animal]
- Casey Cooper McGillis: Why would you take Wubby?
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: I don't know.
- Casey Cooper McGillis: Do you like him?
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Doesn't matter. But suppose I took him to work, and I lost him. What would you do?
- Casey Cooper McGillis: I'd get him back.
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: How?
- Casey Cooper McGillis: I'd call him and he'd come.
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: No, he can't hear you, he's at the base.
- Casey Cooper McGillis: He can hear me anywhere!
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Somebody stuffed cotton in his ears.
- Casey Cooper McGillis: He can find his way home; he'd follow you car.
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: I drive through the motor range - he takes a direct hit!
- Casey Cooper McGillis: He wears a magic hat and nothing can hurt him.
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Casey!
- [angry]
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: I'll be right back.
- [goes back to the kitchen where Polly waits]
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: I can't whop her.
- Polly Cooper McGillis: That's wonderful!
- [hugs him]
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Not until I calm down.
- [he exist out the kitchen's back door; there is a loud smash from him hitting something. He walks back in]
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Okay.
- Polly Cooper McGillis: John, the punishment's already been meaded out; she's grounded and no TV for a month.
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: You call that punishment?
- Polly Cooper McGillis: I call that a very serious punishment.
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: I call that a chance to catch up on your reading.
- Polly Cooper McGillis: What did you have in mind?
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: I'd go spank her.
- [motions with a hand and starts moving toward the kitchen exit into the living room where Casey is awaiting punishment]
- Polly Cooper McGillis: I... wait, John - we don't spank here. We have our own method of discipline and the kids are turning out just fine.
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Oh, really? Where's my medal?
- [holds his empty right hand palm up]
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Probably stuck to the bottom of somebody's shoe.
- Polly Cooper McGillis: Wait, John! There has to be a better way to discipline someone than whaling the tar out of them.
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: No, Polly - I don't "whale". Now, Casey is about to recieve a very calm, a very rational whoppin'.
- Polly Cooper McGillis: Good, she'll appreciate the subtle distinction.
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: A good honest whoppin' helps a child remember what's right, and what's wrong. It also lets them know you mean what you say and you're willing to back it up.
- Polly Cooper McGillis: Where'd you get that? The Whopper's Handbook?
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Well, it's better than the Liberal's Guide to Child Pampering.
- [in a mocking tone]
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: If a child misbehaves, set it down, then frown for it, and say, "Do you see this face? This is my disappointed face."
- Polly Cooper McGillis: See? Not so hard.
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Well, what about the direct honest approach? You're mad at 'em. You tell 'em so and you whop 'em.
- Polly Cooper McGillis: What if Casey has already learned her lesson? That what she did was wrong and she'll never do it again.
- [blocking him from leaving the kitchen]
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Without a whoppin'?
- Polly Cooper McGillis: Oh, God - your'e itchin' to do it, aren't you? Whop! Whop! Whop!
- [like one of the Three Stoges]
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Temper, temper, temper.
- [pats her on the head]
- Polly Cooper McGillis: Okay. doesn't Casey at least deserve a chance to prove she doesn't need to be spanked?
- Maj. John D. 'Mac' McGillis: Okay, I'm willing to be fair. But the smart money's on whoppin'.
- [walks passed her out the kitchen]