- Jon Arbuckle: Garfield's been a very bad dog lately. I'm gonna teach him a lesson she'll never forget.
- [Garfield has just unwrapped an impossibly huge picnic]
- Garfield: No, that's not a mistake. That's how much food I always pack.
- Garfield: Eating, the only thing preferable in this world to sleeping. Boy, if they could just come up with a way to eat and sleep at the same time, they'd really have something.
- Owl: Who... Who... Where... Where... When... When...
- Jon Arbuckle: [dazed and with a beard] No, ladies, I'm not Tom Selleck, but I can understand how you could make that mistake.