- Candy Smalls: Even penguins think I'm funny, and you know what a tough crowd those miserable motherfuckers are.
- Devin: Let's go over that joke again.
- Candy Smalls: A cucumber, a pickle and a penis sit down at a bar...
- Candy Smalls: My personal, very own imitation of Santa...
- [deep voice]
- Candy Smalls: Did I tell you I chose the first Black Successor? If you forget, I'll remind you until you die.