- The Angry Video Game Nerd: [after a chessy fight with a Klingon] Phew! Well, lesson learned. Don't say anything bad about Klingon's. Klingon's don't fuck around.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: "Shall I add the repellent to our inventory, Sir? Yes or No?" Well, yes! Why would I say "no"? It's like my crew is out of their fucking minds!
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: Here's the thing about the Vectrex. There was no color, but each game came with an overlay. You slide it over the screen, and there you go. I fail to see the point.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: One thing that's incredibly annoying is this loud buzzing sound. It reacts to the graphics. It's caused by a lack of shielding between the ray tube and the speaker wiring. It's penetrating my auditory nerves, I must deactivate this game's power supply.
- [turns the Vectrex off]
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: So you talk to some of the natives and they're like "Sure! We don't care, you crazy spacemen from the distant future who we've never seen before! Go ahead and raid our holy temple." In fact, they even offer to help make a repellent for the blood worms in the forest. It's like "Hey, you wanna rob my house? Here's the key!" Most illogical.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: First you gotta find a library card, then you gotta get back your lost communicator and you zap two guys find a diamond, you exchange it with the shop owner for a marked deck of cards, then you find a bone on the sidewalk and a gumball from some guy with a dog, then you find a hair pin, then you find a stick, you gotta put the gumball on the end of the stick, put it in the gutter and fish out some coins, then you talk to a bar tender and get Oxmyx's phone number, give him the diamond in exchange for some plates, you take the plates to the police, use the hairpin and the bone to open up the door, find counterfeit money, use the coins on the phone booth, give the operator the number, go in to talk to Oxymyx about the communicator, he tells you to go to Cracklin's place, he tells you Bonehead Malone has the communicator, you go to the casino, you give Bonehead the money, you give him your marked deck of cards and you get the communicator!
- [last lines]
- [while shooting the Metron in the face]
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: Mercy this, motherfucker!
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: What is it? You want Genesis?
- [holds up a Sega]
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: You can have Genesis.