No Strings Attached (I) (2011)

Kevin Kline: Alvin

Photos 

Quotes 

• Alvin : We don't get to pick who we fall in love with, and it doesn't happen like it should.

• Adam : You're fucking my ex-girlfriend?

  Alvin : Well, yeah. But... She's just so hot.

  Adam : I know how hot she is.

  Vanessa : [peeking out into the hallway]  That's really sweet. Thanks, guys.

  Adam : Fuck you!

• Alvin : When you're married and you do blow, try to stay away from women who want to fuck you. Even ugly women. Blow is blind, Adam. Blow is blind.

  Adam : You're an asshole.

  Alvin : But you're not. You got a good heart, Adam. Try to keep it.

• Alvin : How long have you two been together?

  Emma : Oh, we're not.

  Adam : We're sex friends.

  Emma : Yes we are.

  Adam : Friends with benefits. Fuck buddies.

  Alvin : [surprised]  Great Scott!

• Alvin : Come on. Hit me!

  Adam : What? No. I'm not going to hit you. I don't want to hurt you.

  Alvin : You're not going to hurt me. Come on!

  [flexes] 

  Alvin : Come on, quick before I get a hernia!

• Alvin : Let's smoke some weed!

• Alvin : So... Are you having sex?

  [hands marijuana to Adam] 

  Adam : Yes. I'm having sex.

  Alvin : 'Cause if you want any pointers, you know... I can help you out. If there's one thing you learn after two failed marriages, it's how to eat kitty. Anyone special?

  Adam : No. I mean, not since Vanessa.

  Alvin : It's been a year. It's time to move on.

  Adam : It's been eight months, Dad.

• Vanessa : [to Adam]  I know this might be hard, but just because I'm your ex-girlfriend, doesn't mean that you can't look at me as... a kind of... mum?

  Emma : Oh, boy.

  Vanessa : Especially because, well... Alvin and I have been talking about...

  [reverently:] 

  Vanessa : creating new life... together.

  Alvin : You see, we were at... Burning Man.

  Vanessa : And we were dressed up.

  Alvin : Yeah. I was dressed as a... fire bird.

  Emma : [to Vanessa]  And what were you dressed as?

  Vanessa : I was naked. And we were just out there in the desert... and... and he was burying my bare body in the sand.

  Alvin : Yeah, and I was pecking at it... with my fire bird.