- The Angry Video Game Nerd: These are the games. Pretty elaborate, right? The titles are the best part. What kind of games did you grow up with? Maybe Wrecking Crew on the NES, or Afterburner on the Sega Master System, or how about Game #1 on the Odyssey?
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: This one is called "Analogic". Yeah, that one sounds fun. It's like the logic of your ass.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: I like how the instructions tell you that Alaska and Hawaii aren't really down there. Hey, Nerdy Turd! Did you know that Hawaii isn't really south of Texas?
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: A wheel and a ball is all you need to play Roulette, not a sheet of plastic with a glowing dot on your TV screen.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: Now all we need is someone to play with. Sorry, but these are 2-player games, so I don't really have much of a choice.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: People in 1972 must have been bored out of their minds. You really gotta use your imagination because the Odyssey doesn't have any sound. When you think about it, it doesn't have any graphics either.
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: Oh, look, he's got a nuclear boner! Nuclear boner! She's giving birth to a solar baby!
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: Primitive isn't even the word. It barely qualifies as a video game. Master Shake would say, "If I were to play Tetris, I'd just draw it on a flip book and animate it." You might as well be playing with rocks!
- The Angry Video Game Nerd: The Odyssey doesn't fuck around! This is what you call a gun! I mean look at it! It's a fucking rifle! You can never get away with something like this nowadays! It just blows my mind! I can't believe there exists a gun like this!... Let's try it out!