Cosmopolis (2012)

Sarah Gadon: Elise Shifrin

Photos 

Quotes 

• Eric Packer : I like your mother. You have your mother's breasts.

  Elise Shifrin : Her breasts?

  Eric Packer : Great, standup tits.

• Elise Shifrin : I don't like saying this but... you smell of sex.

• Elise Shifrin : I like taxis. I was never good at geography, and I learn things by asking the drivers where they come from.

  Eric Packer : They come from horror and despair.

  Elise Shifrin : Yes, exactly. One learns about the countries where unrest is occurring by riding the taxis here.

• Elise Shifrin : I'll tell you what the problem is. I don't know how to be indifferent. I can't master this and it makes me susceptible to pain. In other words, it hurts.

• Elise Shifrin : [on meeting her husband]  You absolutely reek of sexual discharge.

• Elise Shifrin : Where were you going?

  Eric Packer : To get a haircut.

  Elise Shifrin : Do you need a haircut?

  Eric Packer : I need anything you can give me.

• Eric Packer : You smoke since when?

  Elise Shifrin : I took it up when I was 15. It's one of those things a girl picks up - tells her she's more than a skinny body that no one looks at. There's a certain drama in her life.

  Eric Packer : She notices herself, then other people notice her, and she marries one of them, and they go to dinner.

• Elise Shifrin : Where is your office? What do you do exactly? You know things, I think this is what you do. I think you acquire information and turn it into something awful.

• Elise Shifrin : You were just in Singapore.

  Eric Packer : What makes you say that?

  Elise Shifrin : I can smell it. Every country in the world has its own distinct odor and yours is of Singapore.

  Eric Packer : Then would you kindly relate to me just what Singapore is supposed to smell like?

  Elise Shifrin : Fish mostly, and sickeningly sweet air-freshener.

  Eric Packer : I was at a fish-market, the one located on 48th street, sandwiched between the used tissue dealership and the asbestos teddy-bear factory.

  Elise Shifrin : No, you weren't; you smell specifically of Singaporean fish. I know singaporean fish when I smell them... Dinosaurs.

  Eric Packer : They have blueberry pie in Singapore. A uniquely American dish. There's cream in blueberry pie, but it's more often referred to as slurry. Slurry is what cream is called when it's being harbored in pie-crust. I generally prefer to simply refer to it as pie-filling as I find words like slurry to be most unappetizing.

  Elise Shifrin : I need a haircut.

  Eric Packer : Rats have been used as currency ever since the extinction of the hamster. This is the only explanation for how Jerry Lewis became so well respected in France.

  Elise Shifrin : France smells of shower currents.

  Eric Packer : I didn't ask you what France smelled like.

  Elise Shifrin : Whether or not asked the question is irrelevant as I have already informed you of the answer. There is no way to reverse this. Your best hope for survival is to eliminate the future for only when the future has been eradicated we can ever hope to reincarnate the past as a means of elongating the present. Then, and only then can mankind have the ideal place in which to store his pet rock collection.

  Eric Packer : I used to love brown rice.

  Elise Shifrin : You have just reminded me; I've yet to start writing the speech I promised Sara Palin.

  Eric Packer : Since when were you ever a speech writer?

  Elise Shifrin : It started when I was a bluejay still attending kindergarten at Harvard. I tiptoed through the tulips exactly the way Tiny Tim instructed. Latter it would be my misfortune to find out that he never actually write those lyrics. The betrayal is too much to bear and yet I remain emotionless - Haircuts.

  Eric Packer : Fuck haircuts! It's the mighty pomegranate that contains much needed antioxidants... Potatoes!

• Eric Packer : You eat breakfast yet?

  Elise Shifrin : No.

  Eric Packer : Good, I'm hungry for something thick and chewy.