The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)

The Creepy Candy Coating Corollary (2009)

Johnny Galecki: Leonard Hofstadter

Photos 

Quotes 

• Penny : I just told her you're an aerospace engineer and you speak five languages.

  Howard Wolowitz : Six, if you count Klingon.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Girls don't count Klingon, Howard. Right?

  Penny : Right.

• Penny : [after sex]  Wow. You really are a genius.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Not really. I Googled how to do that.

• Leonard Hofstadter : Still can't believe she's going out with me.

  Raj Koothrappali : Nobody can.

• Leonard Hofstadter : You know that deep down inside, Howard's a really nice guy.

  Penny : The problem isn't what's on the inside. It's the creepy candy coating.

• Leonard Hofstadter : Sheldon has kind of a photographic memory.

  Sheldon Cooper : Photographic is a misnomer; I have an eidetic memory, as I've told you many times, most recently last year during lunch on the afternoon of May 7th. You had turkey and complained it was dry.

• [Leonard is asking Penny to set Howard up with one of her friends] 

  Penny : You mean you thought a good time to bring this up would be right after sex?

  Leonard Hofstadter : Well... I sure as hell wasn't gonna bring it up *before* sex. *During*, I was trying to remember what I read on Google.

• Penny : OK, I gotta go.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Why?

  Penny : Because last time I didn't go, I ended up playing Mystic Warlords of Ka.

  Howard Wolowitz : Not Ka, *Ka'a*.

  Penny : Buh-aye.

• Leonard Hofstadter : How about that? Albert Einstein was wrong.

  Penny : What?

  Leonard Hofstadter : Approaching the speed of light doesn't slow down time.

  Leonard Hofstadter : [Points at Howard and Bernadette]  Approaching them does.

• [first lines] 

  Howard Wolowitz : All right, Raj has played his Phantom Warlord card. And I am going to back him up with my Strangling Vines.

  [in Jar Jar Binks accent] 

  Howard Wolowitz : Choke on that, Sucka!

  Leonard Hofstadter : Okay. Well then, I'll just *cut* your Vines with my Ruby Sword. That's right, I did it, I cut 'em.

  Penny : Um... I have a question.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Warlord beats Troll; Troll beats Elf; Elf beats Water Sprite, and basically everything beats Enchanted Bunny.

  Howard Wolowitz : Unless you have the Carrot of Power.

  Penny : Okay, I've got another question. When does this get fun?

  Howard Wolowitz : Are we going to talk or are we going to play Mystic Warlords of Ka'a?

• Howard Wolowitz : Leonard, a pact is a pact. You have to get Penny to fix me up.

  Leonard Hofstadter : It's not that simple. What am I supposed to say, "Penny, do you have any friends you'd like to never hear from again?"

• Howard Wolowitz : You and I made a pact that if either of us ever got a hot girlfriend, that person would have his girlfriend hook the other guy up with one of her girlfriends.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Yeah, I don't remember that.

  Sheldon Cooper : June 30th, 2004.