Bite Marks (2011)

Benjamin Lutz: Brewster

Photos 

Quotes 

• Cary : Where are the seat belts?

  Brewster : Seat belts are for pussies!

• Brewster : Crow in a blender!

• Brewster : I'm gonna fuck you, then I'm gonna drain your blood, then I'm gonna fuck ya again!

• Brewster : I'm gonna call a mechanic. I'll be right back. Don't jizz on anythin'.

• Brewster : Grab your wieners and pray for rain.

• Brewster : This wouldn't be a funeral home, would it?

  McDougall : No, we do Brazilian waxes.

• McDougall : What's the matter, son, you piss yourself?

  Brewster : Nah. Like if I were an avocado at a mosquito convention pissin' on a firecracker, how 'bout that?

• Brewster : Don't move! If you run, I'll find you and when I do, I'll make it hurt!

  Vogel : So what, you're evil now? I mean, you were a jerk before, but you weren't acting like some b-movie bad guy. Is that what dying does to you? Turn you into a twat?

• Waitress : Coffins? A coffin? Are you nuts? What would I do with a coffin?

  Brewster : Hey, we all need one eventually, darlin'.

  Waitress : Not me. I'm gonna be cremated and have my ashes mailed to Val Kilmer.

• McDougall : You want some coffee?

  Brewster : Yeah... and a bathroom. I've had to pee since dinner.

  McDougall : Well, you're in luck. Best thing about being a man is, whole world's your toilet. Why, out there, there're a hundred places you can drain the tank and look at metal twisted into shapes you never dreamed of. It's like... it's like pissin' in an art museum.

• [Brewster picks up his phone off the floor] 

  Brewster : Bitch! You drop these once, they're only good for butt-plugs!

• Brewster : Cary? Isn't that a girl's name?

  Cary : Different spelling.

  Brewster : Right! How often do you have to spell it?

  Cary : There are lots of guys named Cary.

  Brewster : Name one.

  Vogel : Cary Grant

  Brewster : Name another.

  Cary : Cary Elwes.

  Brewster : Who the fuck is Cary Elwes?

  Cary : Hello? Princess Bride!

• Brewster : Seriously though, Cary? Total girl's name!

• Waitress : Last time I saw you, I was still a virgin.

  Brewster : Last time I saw you was the last time you were!

• Waitress : What you carrying today, Brewster? Anything that nobody'd notice if one went missing?

  Brewster : Sure, darlin'. I'm sure there's one in the back that would fit you just fine.

  Waitress : Really? Would I get a lot of use from it?

  Brewster : Oh, yeah. You'd use it a long time.

  Waitress : Nice. What is it?

  Brewster : Coffins.

• Brewster : Hey! Cram it with walnuts, Cary!

• [Brewster looks under the truck] 

  Cary : What's the matter?

  Brewster : Hell if I know, Cary.

  Cary : Didn't your G.E.D. exam have a section on trucks?

• Brewster : What's happening?

  Vogel : Oh, not much. We're just trapped inside your truck with monster central outside. How are things with you, Mr. Seizure?

• [there are vampires outside the truck] 

  Cary : They might not be able to get in anyway, without being invited.

  Vogel : That didn't work in The Return of Count Yorga.

  Cary : Of course not, that was American International.

  Vogel : So?

  Cary : So each movie makes its own rules. None of it is grounded in reality.

  Vogel : I saw one get killed by a bolt of lightning in Scars of Dracula.

  Cary : Now, that is just stupid.

  Brewster : If either of you mentions Twilight, I'll throw ya out the cab!

• [Brewster talks into the C.B. microphone] 

  Brewster : Breaker, breaker, this is... This is red rocket. Anybody copy?

  Vogel : Red rocket?

  Brewster : Shut up.

• Brewster : I get it! This thing's been diddlin' with our mind-knobs!

• Brewster : Hey! Are you tryin' to bite my ass?